


Reborn

by 1thousandminus7



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, M/M, Slash, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-03-19 01:25:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 25
Words: 70,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3591150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1thousandminus7/pseuds/1thousandminus7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"But Magnus, necromancy is not only illegal, but impossible! Isn't it?" "Not if you have the right connections, my dear." Magnus is left heartbroken following Alec's untimely death, and looks for any possible solution. But he might not get quite what he bargained for. Caution: Character death, angst and lemons.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cold

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic is a work in progress, so expect periodic updates. It's also up on fanfiction.net, so check that out. I also recently got asked if my fanfic could be used on a YouTube channel recommending good stories with little publicity, so go check that out if you're interested- channel name is laurenathalasa
> 
> I am well aware that elements of this fanfic are not accurate to the final book. That is because I started writing this before it had been published. However I will be including references to the final book in later chapters. So... Spoiler alert. 
> 
> If you're just here for smut, look to chapters 7,8, 13 and 22, my friend ;)

# Reborn

## Preface: Cold

Alec POV

People always say that death is cold. If that's true, does that mean I'm dead? It doesn't feel like it. After all, I can still hear. Still see. Even if all I do is stare at the sterile, white ceiling. Everything in here is sterile. The smell of chemicals and illness hangs in the air like a haze. I can almost taste the bleach. The cotton sheets are rough under my unmoving fingers, although I am almost numb to the texture. Every part of me - my hands, my feet, my heart - is cold. I have been cold for some time, but now that cold is sapping the strength from my limbs as if it is trying to trying to convert it into warmth and failing. I know I am injured. I know it's a deep wound. And yet the numb cold steals the heat of pain. I wish I could feel it again, the heat. Like fire straight through me. I remember it well, though the feeling escapes me.

I had been sent to kill a pack of hellhounds set loose in downtown Brooklyn. It seemed easy enough, as hellhounds are not the brightest of demons. I had grown reckless in my absence of emotion, and Jace and Izzy had specifically told me to be on defence. My speciality. I managed to do as I was told until there was only one left. Jace was occupied: apparently dying hellhounds make for interesting target practice for him, and Izzy and I were taking on the last one, me distracting its attention away from Izzy's whirling blade as she tried to land a fatal blow. I was ducking and dodging its massive jaws as Izzy went in for the kill. As she struck it, it whirled on her, but before it could attack, I had pulled the dagger from my belt and had sunk it into the creature's hindquarters. It let out a pained howl, black ichor spewing from the wound. I drove my blade in deeper, focusing on keeping it from attacking Izzy, when I heard Jace shout my name. Startled, I looked round, only to feel a sudden flame in my abdomen. Izzy screamed, but I barely registered the sound. Looking down in disbelief, I saw a bizarre protrusion from the front of my battle gear; a thick, bone-coloured spike, dripping gore. Unbeknownst to me, the demon's spiked tail had swung at me, hitting me in the back as I stabbed it. I stared at the thing, wondering at the tongues of flame that licked my insides with sharp pain, the only thing I had truly felt in days. Jace quickly beheaded the beast, and, as it folded in on itself, I collapsed, like it was the only thing holding me up. The flames slowly dissipated, and, as Izzy knelt beside me, eyes full of worry, my strength went with them, and I blacked out.

I can feel my sister's touch on my palm now. She clasps my still, frigid hand in her own, and although my eyes remain on the dirty-white ceiling, I hear her.

"Alec... Angel, Alec, I don't know if you can hear me, but please... Come back to us," she sounds close to tears, "Please Alec, I've already lost one brother. Don't make me lose you too." Her vicelike grip on my hand sends a dull pain down my arm, and her touch burns. Yes, she'd already lost one brother. Little Max, in his overlarge glasses, not even ten. The wide-eyed, inquisitive boy who'd always looked up to Jace rather than me. Sometimes it hurt when he went to Jace with scraped knees or broken toys rather than his real brother, but I loved him. And I miss him. All the times I'd carried him to bed after he'd fallen asleep on the sofa, all the times he'd watched, open-mouthed, as I trained with my bow, they all seem so distant, like a dream. I hope the angels are looking after him. Maybe I'll see him again one day. If I make it to the same place as him.

I doubt it.

Now I see a flash of gold against the monotonous pale grey of the ceiling - Jace. He waves a hand in front of my face.

"No change?"

"Nothing."

"Damn it." He curses. "It's been three days. Maybe we should call Bane." Part of me wanted to laugh out loud at this. He wouldn't help me. He hates me. His name suits him. He truly is the bane of my existence. Magnus Bane. The man I had risked everything for. The reason I'm going to hell. Because of him, I'm an outcast among my own people. A freak. The faggot who dated - Angel forbid - a _Downworlder_. A stupid, sparkly warlock. I can still remember the looks of horror on their faces on that night in the Accords hall when I'd taken him into my arms and kissed him in front of the whole Clave. In that moment, I hadn't cared about what they'd thought. All that mattered was Magnus. His touch had burned too, in a different way to Izzy's. Where hers was on the surface, his touch had burned under my skin, and I had loved it. I had loved him.

Since then, I haven't really had a civil conversation with my parents. Especially my dad. My dad, the Inquisitor. Apparently my sheer existence jeopardises his position. I'm a disappointment. They keep asking whether or not I'm over my 'phase'. They don't want to believe they have a gay son. They don't want me, but they're stuck with me. But hey, at least they're free of the warlock. I made sure of that. I betrayed his trust, and now he hates me.

I miss him.

The absence of him hurts. Not hot, burning pain, but a slow, draining ache in my heart. Just thinking about him intensifies the pain. I can see his face in my unconscious mind, a bright mix of colour and light against the monochrome, steel-grey ceiling. Bright yellow cat's eyes pierce my own, and a familiar blue fire sparks from long, thin fingers. My memory blurs and darkens the image, but those colours remain vivid. If I concentrate, I can hear his voice too, his sultry, velvet tones wash over my ears. It doesn't matter that I can't understand what he says, just that I can hear his voice. But I can't hold on to the image forever, and eventually it is drowned by the charcoal ceiling once more. Even as it vanishes, I can feel his touch, its burn, once more, ghostly and distant on my wrist, and his voice rises in volume.

"Alec! Stay with me! Come back, please!" I smile internally. Dream-Magnus would always want me, no matter what. I don't like that he sounds distressed though. I'm here, Magnus. I'm always here. Always yours. His tones send a note of sadness through me. All of a sudden, the beats of my sore heart are contrived, painful. I feel them heavy and laboured, and I can feel the heat of Magnus' hand on my bare chest. I want it to stop. It hurts.

And then it does stop, halted by a single, basic sensation. The familiar feeling of his lips on mine, pressing down roughly. My memory preserved that feeling perfectly. As he kisses me, I feel a flutter in my chest. He still elicits these reactions from me. But almost as soon as I feel it, it's gone again, and so is his mouth. I want to cry out, to tell him to come back, but it's no use. You can't talk to your imagination. The pain in my heart returns, thick, forced beats in my cold chest. One, two, three, four. And then he comes back, and I relish the feeling of his mouth against mine once more, and again the flutter, as if of a summer breeze, in my chest. It becomes a routine. Four beats. A kiss. Another four. Another kiss. I don't understand.

Eventually it stops, and the last sensations rush from my body as I succumb to numbness again. I barely feel it when the dead-black ceiling falls on me, erasing the last dregs of my conscious thought. But before my illusion disappears entirely, I hear that beautiful voice once more, although it sounds broken and muffled.

 _Ave atque vale_ , Alexander.

Hail and farewell.


	2. Broken

Magnus POV

"Alec! Stay with me! Come back, please!" I pressed my fingers to the inside of his wrist, desperate to feel that steady throb of life beneath them. Nothing. Still, his wide blue eyes stared straight upwards, only now they were unfocused, glassy. I felt sick. I was not going to let this happen. He would live, one way or another.

I pulled back the white sheets, exposing his torso. Coarse bandages encircled his stomach, a dark red stain tarnishing them. His skin around them was pale. Too pale. The black marks contrasted so much, making him look even whiter. When I pressed both my hands over his heart, the difference between my caramel skin and his made me wince. Feeling no beat beneath my palms, I began doing compressions. One, two, three, four. I pressed my lips to his, breathing air into him and feeling his chest rise in response. But once I had straightened up, it fell, and did not rise again. I repeated the process, focusing on nothing but bringing him back, making him live again. If I could have given him my own life I would have. As it was, all I could do was keep going. One, two, three, four, breathe one two three, four, breathe, over and over. I willed him to gasp in a breath, to sit up, to blink, anything. I felt weak. My mind was whirling, and all I could think was that this thing beneath my hands was not Alec, that it was a wax doll with Alec's face, and glass marbles for eyes. Alec was alive. Alec was warm. This thing was not. This thing was dead.

I don't know how long I'd been repeating the same pattern, but eventually I felt a hand on my shoulder. I tried to shrug it off, to continue, but it pulled me away from the Alec-doll, spinning me so I met burning golden eyes. Jace. I glowered at him, baring my teeth, but he didn't let go.

"Magnus. Stop." I blinked. "It's over. He's gone." No. No he wasn't. He couldn't be. Not yet. Not now. I pulled away, turning back to the figure that tied my whole world down. He was still in there. Somewhere. But before I could resume my actions, Jace had pulled me away again.

"Let me GO!" I roared at him, and tried to shove him away, but the angel boy was fast, and had dodged me before I could react. I felt his arms restrain mine, and I growled.

"There's no point Magnus! If he was going to come back he would have by now! He's gone! I know, because I can't feel him anymore," I narrowed my eyes at the wall, "There's nothing there. I'm his Parabatai. I should know." At his words, I felt the fight drain out of me, and all of a sudden I felt weaker than an autumn leaf, quivering at the end of a branch. He let go of my arms, and I fell to my knees, my will to stay up evaporating. I felt empty. Like a puppet whose strings had been cut. A high pitched scream pierced my ears, and I saw Isabelle run to Alec's side and scoop his body into her arms, hugging him tight. His head fell back limply as she lifted him off the pillow. Jace pulled me to my feet, and helped me over to his bedside. I saw Isabelle's tear-streaked face as she lay him down tenderly, brushing dark hair back from his face with quivering fingers. As I reached a hand out to touch his cheek, she drew back respectfully, giving me space. My fingertips ghosted over his eyelids, hiding the once-beautiful blue eyes which now just looked wrong. Tracing the contours of his face, I ran my thumb over his full lower lip. It felt soft and familiar, despite the lack of temperature. And then I leaned over and kissed him one last time, gently but desperately, as if my love could bring him back. He died thinking I hated him. Maybe if I proved otherwise he'd find the will to live again. My warm mouth moved over his cold one softly, trying to coax a response from him. Still nothing. I gasped suddenly and uncontrollably, and pulled back, confused until I saw a droplet of water fall to his waxen cheek and roll down his skin. I was crying, for the first time in decades. I stared for a moment as more tears splashed onto his white cheeks, and then I broke. Sobs racked my thin frame as I let my forehead fall to touch his. I clutched his body to mine like a scared toddler hugs their favourite toy, and I cried.

Somewhere in the midst of my grief, I heard Jace's voice as if from another room entirely.

"Someone should say the last rites." Choking on my sobs, and hearing neither Jace or Isabelle approach, I attempted to steady my breath, letting him go and wiping my tears off his face. When I finally managed to speak, I spoke with as much love and meaning as I could muster, trying to put all my emotion into three simple words, words I rarely, if ever, uttered.

"Ave atque vale, Alexander. Hail and farewell." Jace and Isabelle repeated my words respectfully. Placing one last kiss on his forehead, and committing his peaceful face to memory, I pulled up the sheet, and covered his body, steadying my shaking hands.

"Thank you, Magnus. Thank you for coming back. Thank you for trying." Isabelle's usually confident voice was quiet and measured. I couldn't meet her eyes.

"Trying isn't good enough." Before she could respond, I had stood up, and was walking out of the room and away from them. I had to leave. I didn't belong here, and they knew it. I had failed, and now I had to leave.

 

"Magnus?" I heard a knock on my door, and a female voice say my name. Clary.

"Go away." I hadn't spoken to anyone for a week, and I wasn't about to start now. The Chairman meowed pitifully at me, clawing the hem of my lilac, fluffy dressing gown. "Don't do that. You'll ruin it." The small ball of fluff huffed and stalked off to go find something more entertaining to play with, like a cardboard takeout container.

"Magnus, answer the door!" A male voice this time, strident, annoying and too familiar. Great. He wasn't going to leave me alone until I answered. I dragged myself out of the squashy armchair I had sunk myself in, added my empty coffee mug to the collection of dirty mugs already on the table, and yanked the door open, trying to look menacing and failing.

"And to what do I owe this pleasure?" I sneered. Jace rolled his eyes, but Clary was instantly sympathetic.

"Oh, Magnus, you look awful!"

"Thank you for reminding me, cupcake. Next time I need someone to tell me the obvious I'll be sure to ring you up." I did look terrible. I hadn't bothered with cosmetics or hair products in days, despite the shadows under my eyes and pinched cheeks that simply cried for attention. My hair was loose, a limp black sheet that I had let reach my shoulders, and I probably had zits due to the amount of junk food I'd eaten lately. Normally I would have preferred to be skinned alive than let myself look this dreadful, but I just didn't care anymore. "Now would someone please answer my question?"

"Well..." Clary was blushing slightly and picking at her coat sleeve. "If you want... I mean, if you feel like..."

"Oh for Raziel's sake. It's Alec's funeral tomorrow and we want to know if you'll be there." Hearing his name hit me like a punch in the gut, and for a moment I was silent. "You look like you could do with a bit of fresh air. Don't tell me you've been sat in there watching reruns of Project Runway all week."

"How I choose to pass my time is no concern of yours. Now go away."

"But what about tomorrow?" Clary looked up at me, worry evident in her eyes.

"...I'll be outside the Institute gates at nine AM." And I slammed the door in their faces.

Now to prepare myself for possibly the worst event I'd ever go to.


	3. Farewell

Magnus POV

I stared at my reflection in the full length mirror I'd conjured into my bedroom. I'd done my best to make myself look presentable. I must have used at least half of my concealer hiding the dark circles under my eyes and the blemishes on my skin, covered with a layer of powder to keep it looking natural. I'd tied my hair back, since I hadn't bothered to cut it yet, and it was slicked into place with the industrial-strength gel I usually used to style it into my classic spikes. I was dressed in a spotless, neatly pressed white suit, in accordance with Shadowhunter mourning tradition, although I had pinned a red rose to my breast pocket. My eyes were lightly lined with waterproof eyeliner, just enough for emphasis, not enough to make a statement. I looked... different.

I glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece as I pulled on my most modest pair of black boots. Quarter to nine. That gave me fifteen minutes to get there. Plenty of time. I put down a bowl of food and water for the Chairman, and left.

Halfway there, I passed a florists'. I looked in. Usually I would just conjure any item I needed, but today... For that purpose, it seemed wrong. Alec wouldn't like me to lay stolen flowers on his grave. Not that he'd have a grave; Shadowhunters cremate their dead. I didn't like that idea. I didn't want to watch my Angel burn, but what right did I have to dispute tradition?

Walking into the small shop, I looked around briefly before choosing a traditional bouquet of roses, some red, some white. The red rose of love and the white of mourning. Simple yet beautiful. I paid for the flowers, and continued on my way.

I arrived with a couple of minutes to spare, but Jace, Clary, Isabelle, Maryse and Robert were already there and waiting. I could tell Maryse was avoiding looking at me, but Robert unashamedly glared.

"What right do you have to be here, downworlder?" He all but snarled at me. I didn't have the heart to talk back.

"I don't. But I come to pay my respects to the one I love." I spoke calmly, for once not looking to provoke.

"Love?! Don't talk to me about love! It's your fault he's dead! If it wasn't for you and your stupid games, messing with my son's head, he never would have been so reckless!" I flinched. His words cut like a knife, wounding me to my core. Was that true? Had he put himself in the firing line over me? ...Stupid, naive, selfless Alexander... Why would you do that?

Maryse put her hand on her husband's shoulder. "Now, Robert. Not today. Be civil today. If he wants to pay his respects to Alec's memory then let him. What harm can it do?" Robert looked for a moment like he would turn and yell at her, but then the fight left his eyes, and he stepped back.

"Let's go."

The ceremony was held in the courtyard of the Silent City, in the shadow of the mausoleum. A few others had turned up; Luke and Jocelyn, Jordan and Maia. Simon held Isabelle close as she cried. A few other families had turned up from Idris, presumably friends of Robert and Maryse. They gathered around the funeral pyre. A carefully structured altar of wood stood alone, and there upon it lay my Angel. He looked at peace, dressed in an unblemished white silk tunic bound at his waist with a silver ribbon, arms crossed over his chest, seraph blade in hand. His body had been preserved well- it looked no different to how it had that last night a week, an eternity ago. I approached slowly, the sight of him serving to twist the dagger in my heart, causing nearly unbearable pain. I felt tears pricking my eyes once more as I lay the roses at the foot of the pyre. stepping back, I closed my eyes, face pointing towards the heavens.

"Angel Raziel..." My voice was quiet, so quiet I was the only one who could hear me. "I don't know if you listen to downworlders like me... I don't know if you can even hear me, but if you can... If you will, please take care of him... Please look after my Angel, up there with you. He deserves it. After everything he's been through, after everything I put him through... It was never his fault. So treat him well, if not for me, then for his family, for Isabelle and Jace and Maryse and even Robert... And for him. I beg you." I opened my eyes, staring at the azure sky, the same colour as his eyes when he laughed. They were always lighter when he was happy. I vaguely wondered if he could see me now. If he could see the morning sunlight glinting off the tear that ran down my cheek as I remembered him. Remembered his laugh. The way his lips felt against mine. All those late mornings in, where's we'd lay in bed together, comfortable in one another's arms. Paris in the moonlight, one of my best memories of him. Standing atop the Arc de Triomphe, watching the lights of the city dance, staring up at the stars, my arms around him, keeping him warm. So long ago now.

These bittersweet memories play through my head throughout the entire service. I listen to first the words of the Silent Brother presiding over the ceremony, echoing in my head, then those of Isabelle, then Jace. His parents don't say anything, but I know they're mourning in their own way. Then Isabelle approaches me.

"Go on. Say something." Her dark eyes encourage me, but I feel my stomach lurch.

"I... I can't."

"Why not?"

"It's not... They won't like it." I make a vague sweeping motion in the direction of the other Shadowhunters.

"It's not about them. It's about Alec, and what he meant to us. He'd want to hear what you have to say."

"No he wouldn't."

She half smiled sadly. "Magnus, to his dying day, he missed you. He never hated you. I watched him lose faith,but he never lost his love for you. Now get up there and say your piece, because whatever my father says, you have just as much of a right to be here as the rest of us."

Swallowing my nerves, and being led by Isabelle to the front, where she placed a soft kiss on my cheek and whispered "Good luck," in my ear, I thought back to my Angel looking down on me, listening for what I had to say, and I knew I had to say my piece.

"I know a lot of you might think I don't belong here, and I'm not going to try to preach to you that I am, because the truth is that I lost any right to that when I left him. But here I am, because I can't pretend to myself that I ever stopped loving him. And love him I did. A lot of people have told me that is wrong, but how can something wrong feel so right? He was my definition of perfect. It was the little things, always the little things. The blush on his cheeks when I complimented him, the way his eyes lit up when he laughed. His habit of brushing back the hair that always fell over his eyes. His atrocity of a fashion sense," I choked a small laugh through the sudden tears, "He was beautiful, though he never saw it. It pained me when he hid himself, flinched away from the world, because I thought the world deserved to know how amazing he was. If he was here, now, I would say to him that I made a terrible mistake, and I would beg his forgiveness, because now... Now I realise that, for all his flaws, I... I love him. And I can't..." I faltered as the truth of what I was about to say hit me, "I can't live without him..."

I stole a glance at him, his beautiful waxen face, and my heart jumped. I need him. If I can't have him, I'm going to fade away. I'm going to die.

As I stepped down, Isabelle wrapped her arms around me. "That was beautiful. Thank you."

"You're welcome..."

I was the last to speak, and as I rejoined the crowd, the Silent Brother lit a torch, and held it above his head.

_As the spirit of the warrior, so shall our bodies burn in the holy flame which shall burn bright and strong as the honour in glorious death. To this brave warrior we say hail and farewell, and may the great Angel Raziel take him under his wings to live on in spirit as the guardian of our sacred race..._

He touched the torch to the corner of the pyre, and the wood caught quickly, the flames dancing over to lick at the white silk, charring it black, before Alec himself was consumed by the flames. I cast my eyes away as his pale skin first blackened, then turned to ash under the blanket of fire. The air reeked of burning flesh, and I stared skyward at the rising plume of smoke that carried my love's soul into the afterlife.

_I can't live without you..._

And in that moment I vowed to do whatever it would take to bring my Angel back to me.

Even if it meant bargaining with the king of hell himself.


	4. Summoning

Magnus POV

I crashed through the door of my apartment, my head already spinning, trying desperately to come up with ideas for how to make the impossible possible. I knew this would be a massive risk; everyone who had tried beforehand had failed, and usually did not walk away from the experience alive. But I had an advantage they didn't: I had connections.

Throwing my white suit-jacket over the armchair, scaring the Chairman, who yowled and ran off to the bedroom, I went straight to the bookcase full of dusty old volumes cataloguing all different types of magic, seraphic and demonic. I pulled out an especially neglected book in a half-rotted purple binding. Carefully, I brushed off the dust and mould and opened it, deciphering the spidery runes. They were in Purgatic, an ancient form of the demon language that only a few people still spoke. Fortunately, I was one of them. They spoke of dark tales about death and summoning the dead, but the methods were flawed. I was mainly reading this for tips on how best to control the ceremony. It put heavy emphasis on the importance of a full circle, any breaks could jeopardise your safety greatly. It also mentioned burning herbs to drive out evil energies, but I wasn't sure of their credibility. Still, I conjured some white sage and lavender, laying them to one side. I cleared the room of all furniture, and made sure to shut the Chairman in the kitchen- I didn't want to risk him running around whilst I did this.

When the environment was sufficiently clear, I rummaged around an old chest in my study- the place I kept all kinds of unusual magical artifacts, being careful to treat some of the more delicate items with care. Eventually, I found what I was looking for. A gilded black case, about the size of a small shoebox, with a locked clasp. The key was in my desk drawer, easily retrievable.

Returning to the main room, making sure to shut and bolt all the doors and windows, covering the latter with thick swathes of curtains which blocked out all light, I began to get to work. I unlocked the box, opening it carefully. Inside lay an ornate dagger, silver veins winding around an obsidian-black hilt, with a blade of dark grey metal. Demonic runes, runes of sacrifice and bloodshed were carved over every inch of the hilt. A genuine athame. The ritual dagger gleamed darkly in the dim light. My hand closed around its hilt, and it felt cold in my grasp. I dropped to the floor and began to carve into the dark wood. I carved with meticulous detail, making sure there were no breaks in the lines. First a pentagram, then a circle around the pentagram. I decorated every line with runes of binding and protection, both sides. It took a while, but I wasn't going to take any risks with this. As an afterthought, I summoned a container of rock salt and sprinkled it around the circle's perimeter. Lighting the herbs, letting their heavy smell fill the room, I picked up the book, flicking to the necessary page. A summoning spell. A very powerful summoning spell. Taking a deep breath, I stood before the pentagram, athame in hand. Summoning spells work best, I thought, when you have something of the demon you wish to summon. I had nothing, but maybe my blood would do. After all, this demon was my father. Placing the book open on the floor in front of me, I pressed the blade into my skin and pulled. A gasp of pain escaped my lips as the icy metal sliced through my flesh, and dark blood welled up around it. Stepping into the pentagram, careful not to disturb the line of salt, I let my blood drip into the centre of the circle, staining the floor, looking black in the half-light. I left the circle quickly, picking up the book once more.

I scanned through the page quickly, ignoring the way my hand shook as I turned the page. I said I would do anything to get my Angel back. Well, this was anything.

I began to chant. As I chanted, I saw something happen in the centre of the pentagram. The blood was bubbling, releasing wisps of black smoke which coagulated, becoming a thick pillar of darkness. My voice stuttered, but I kept reading. The smoke began to take a shape, a huge, monstrous shadow, humanoid, but with curled horns and a whipping tail, ending in a vicious spike. As I read the last few lines, the smoke solidified, leaving in its place a figure. Its skin was the colour of fresh blood, stretched tight over a skull-like face baring fanged teeth. I stepped back as glowing brimstone eyes rested on me. The smell of sulphur and burning coated the air. When the thing spoke, its voice was like water being poured over hot coals, hissing like steam and fire.

_"Who dares summon Lucifer, king of the Underworld, keeper of souls?"_

"Hello Father." Despite the twisting of fear in my gut, I managed to keep my voice steady.

_"Father? I have not sired many children. Which are you?"_

"Bane. Magnus Bane." I stood tall, meeting his fiery eyes with my own glowing cat's eyes.

_"Ah, yes... Bane."_ His form melted down, becoming shorter, more human. His eyes dulled to smouldering coals, his horns and tail vanishing. Soon, a tall man with a haughty expression and sculpted cheekbones stood before me. A mane of burnished copper hair that flickered like flames framed his pale, pointed face. He wore an all-black suit. I stood on eye level with him, meeting his gaze steadily. _"To summon me is no light undertaking, son of mine or nay. Why do you choose to perform such a perilous feat?"_

"I must request something of you, father. A week ago yesterday, a mortal life was lost to me. I want him back."

_"Mortal life is fleeting. It burns so bright and is snuffed out faster than a candle flame. Why should I return this mortal to you? Why should this one be spared among all others?"_

"He wasn't just any mortal. He was my love." Lucifer laughed, loud and long.

_"Love? Imagine that. The son of the King of Hell in love with a mere mortal. But I know how love twists the human heart in you. I know how mortals will do near anything for their so-called 'love'. Very well. But only on such terms as I make clear."_ I was sure my father could hear the hammering of my heart. My throat felt dry and my legs weak. He would do it... He would bring my Angel back... When I spoke, my voice cracked.

"Anything."

_"A life for a life. A soul for a soul. As I return your love to you, you must offer up a soul to me. A soul whose time is in the distant future. Young and untouched by demonic influence." I nodded briefly. "I will stay for one mortal day. Bring me this soul before then and I will give you what you ask."_

"Th... Thank you," I choked out.

_"Which is the soul you so desire?"_

"...Alexander Gideon Lightwood."

_"As you wish."_ Lucifer's body dissolved into writhing black smoke once more, which dissipated into the air, leaving behind no trace but the scent of brimstone. I stood stock-still. I would get Alexander back... All I had to do was find a sacrifice. But who?


	5. Sacrifice

Magnus POV

Just what I had just agreed to do didn't fully hit me until about an hour after Lucifer had returned to his dimension. The full implications hit me like a wall- I would have to break Covenant law, and the law of the Accords, in order to do this. I had to take an innocent life- a young life- if I was going to bring Alec back. I knew I was twisting fate, being selfish by doing this, but when I contemplated spending my long, empty years alone, without him, I felt instantly and endlessly depressed.

Life just wouldn't be worth living.

And this, this dangling hope just within my grasp was cruel. Of course I was going to chase it, whatever the cost. If I got hunted down and killed by Shadowhunters because of it, then so be it. I'd rather be dead than be caught in this crushing spiral of depression.

So instead I began considering my options.

Untouched by demon influence... That ruled out all Downworlders, demons and, at a push, Jace, but I couldn't take him anyway. No one Alec was close to. He'd hate it if he came back to find another of his friends or family were dead, especially if their death gave him undeserved life. To be honest, he wouldn't like the concept of anyone dying to bring him back. I'd just have to hope he'd see my side. That is, if he even had to find out in the first place. I hated the idea of lying to him, but, as the faeries love to think, there's nothing wrong with a bit of creative truth-telling. Not if it'll save him pain.

So no one from the New York Institute then. A mundane? To be honest, I had no idea whether or not a mundane would fit the bill. They weren't touched by demonic influence, exactly, but I got the feeling Lucifer meant he wanted a Shadowhunter- their seraphic alliance meant they were pure of demon touch. Also, it made sense that Lucifer would want a Shadowhunter's soul in exchange for another Shadowhunter's. I guess that meant I was going to have to go to another Institute. One that was sparsely populated, which would make an easy target. Somewhere far away enough that people wouldn't associate me with the disappearance. Well... There was an Institute in LA, on the other side of the continent. As far as I knew, only one family lived there- the Blackthorns. Whilst the Blackthorn family was fairly extensive, they were mostly children or teenagers. I could vaguely recall meeting a few of them- Helen, her little brother Jules, and the twins. All very young.

Perfect.

I swallowed slightly as a knife of guilt twisted in my stomach. I am no ruthless killer, and the idea of killing a child made me feel sick, but I knew I had to do it. Lucifer had said it himself: someone whose time was in the distant future. The only Shadowhunters whose lifespans were guaranteed for a good few years were those who had not yet become adults.

With a plan in mind, I dressed in a fairly inconspicuous (for me) outfit; worn black skinny jeans and a tight-fitting purple shirt with a plunging neckline, and opened a portal to LA. I wouldn't need to bring anything with me- my magic would provide any service I needed. Taking a deep breath, forcing down my feelings of guilt, I stepped through the portal.

The whirling darkness consumed me for a brief moment, then I was spat back out into bright sunlight and warmth. I blinked a few times, my eyes adjusting to the change from the dark room of my apartment to the broad Californian daylight. Looking around, I saw a row of shops and a park, on the other side of which was an empty-looking church. Bingo. I peeled back the glamour, and the familiar sight of an Institute loomed over me. It was slightly different to the New York Institute in appearance- it seemed more modern, with less of the high arches and Gothic décor. I approached the church carefully, looking out for people who might spot me. I wondered how I was going to do this- knock on the door? Wait for someone to come out then ambush them?- when I caught a glint of light out of the corner of my eye. A child was sat in the courtyard of the Institute. He looked about 10 or 11, and was holding a magnifying glass, which reflected the sunlight. He seemed to be examining something in the grass with great concentration. I remembered him- he was one of the twins, Helen Blackthorn's half brother and sister. His dark hair reminded me briefly of Alec, and my heart gave a lurch. I began to approach him.

When I was about five or six metres away, he looked up, and grey eyes narrowed at me. He stood up and pocketed the magnifying glass, before pulling out a small pocket knife. I stopped.

"Who are you?" His voice was wary, and he took a step back, towards the Institute.

"My name is Magnus. I'm a warlock. We met when you came to New York. I remember you and your twin sister well." A slight lie, but I was sure he wouldn't notice.

"You know Livvy?"

"Yes. And Jules and Helen." They were the only other two whose names I could remember.

"Oh... Why are you here mister Magnus?" I fought back a wave of nausea.

"I was hoping you would help me with something."

"Do you need my help solving a problem? I suppose you know that I'm a detective." He was more relaxed now, and looked rather smug as he examined the edge of his tiny blade. I decided to humour him. It was the least I could do.

"Oh, of course! You're the best around, I've heard." He grinned, and puffed up like a bird. "I was hoping you'd come and help me. You see, someone very important to me is gone, and I need your help getting him back." He frowned.

"I'm not supposed to go anywhere without my parents or one of my brothers or sisters. Can I go get one of them?" I felt a stab of worry. He couldn't go running back to his family- my chance would be gone.

"No, I only need you. It won't take long, I promise."

"But..." He looked slightly nervous now. "I won't be long, and then we'll come right back and I'll help you get him back. I promise!" He slipped the knife back into his pocket and turned to run back to the Institute, but before he could get very far, I snapped my fingers, and he stumbled and fell to the grass. Going over, I waved my hand in front of his face to check he was out cold, then picked him up gently. Before anyone could spot me, I had opened a portal back to my apartment. Safe from prying eyes, I closed the portal and lay the boy down. I considered waking him up, but decided against it. It would be better if he stayed unconscious. Biting my lip and feeling my insides twist in a mixture of anticipation and guilt, I approached the pentagram once more.

"Father? I am back." There was a moment of silence, then the smoke returned, and soon Lucifer was stood, in his human form, in the centre of the carving. He grinned.

_"Back so soon?"_

"I have your sacrifice." I swallowed. Lucifer glanced around the room, and, in spotting the child's prone body, his eyes flashed.

 _"You have outdone yourself, Bane. I admit I had my doubts about whether or not you would do this, but I should have expected nothing less from my son. Bring him to me."_ I picked him up, and lay him gently in the pentagram, being careful not to set foot in it myself. Lucifer beamed, dropping to one knee to inspect my offering. _"Wonderful..."_ He hissed, _"I will make sure your Alexander is perfect."_ He waved his hand over the boy's face, and the grey eyes flickered open. Immediately, he sat bolt upright, shaking and wide-eyed.

"Wh... where am I?" He stuttered, and looked up at Lucifer. Giving a small yelp, he backed away from the fiery demon, but was stopped by a pale hand.

 _"Uh uh uh, my child. Stay here."_ He trembled at the demon's voice, but stayed still. _"What is your name, little one?"_

"T... Tiberius. But my family calls me Ty." He gulped. "Who are you? You smell like a demon..." Lucifer chuckled.

_"I am Magnus's father. I am very grateful to him for bringing you here to me."_

"M... Magnus?" He looked around, and seeing me standing a short way away, hope flashed in his eyes. "Mister Magnus, why am I here? Is he going to help me get your friend back?" I felt ill, and couldn't answer.

 _"Yes, I am. And you are crucial to that. Now come here."_ Lucifer held his arms open, and Tiberius slowly got up and took shaky steps towards him. I turned away as, oh-so slowly, Lucifer brought his hands up to the boy's face. I heard Tiberius's voice, trying and failing not to sound nervous.

"Wh... What are you doing?" And then there was a sickening snap, and a thud. I swallowed as bitter bile rose in my throat. What had I done?

When I looked back, Tiberius was on the floor, neck twisted at an impossible angle, grey eyes staring blankly upward in his last expression of confusion. I wanted to throw up. Lucifer had his eyes closed and his hands on the boy's chest. When he pulled them away, a white, smokelike substance clung to them. As I watched, the substance dissolved. With a snap of his fingers, Tiberius's body burst into flames and was reduced to ash, then nothing. Lucifer grinned at my distressed expression.

"Don't worry. He's in good hands. Now, for my side of the bargain. I believe Shadowhunters burn their dead, don't they? Then I shall have to forge him a new body." I frowned. A new body? But I wanted my Alec... "I see you do not like this idea. He shall look the same, but with a few... changes." I opened my mouth to ask, but Lucifer had closed his eyes and was chanting something in Purgatic. His hands were held out in front of him, and black smoke, much like that which formed his own body, issued from them. As I stared, he began to shape the smoke. At first, it looked a bit like an Iblis demon- vaguely human shaped but still not corporeal, but then it began to solidify, taking a distinct and very familiar shape.

He moulded the substance like clay, and I stared in wonderment as he shaped each contour of the body I knew so well. Alec's sculpted cheekbones, Alec's slim but muscled shoulders, Alec's perfectly toned stomach. Slowly the black faded, becoming pale skin, dark, slightly ruffled hair. I felt my whole body go weak. I remembered Alec's body on the pyre, I remembered it burning, that pale skin turning to ash. And now here he was in front of me once more. There was only one thing missing; his skin was a pale canvas, blank and unmarred by black mark or silver scar.

Lucifer opened his eyes to inspect his handiwork. Seemingly satisfied, he put his hands close together once more. More smoke began to drift from his palms, only this time it was white, like the stuff he had pulled from Tiberius's body. Somehow, in my heart, I knew what I was seeing was a soul. Alec's soul. Everything that made him him. For the third time in just over a week, I felt tears in my eyes. Lucifer held Alec in his palms carefully, before gently pushing it towards the body. It latched onto the pale skin and soaked in, like water into a sponge. Soon all of the substance was absorbed into this new Alec.

My breath caught. There was a dragging, torturous moment of still silence.

Then the body gasped air.


	6. Rebirth

Magnus POV

"A... Alec?" My breaths rattled in my chest, somehow not getting enough air to my brain. My head was spinning. I couldn't believe what I was seeing- it had been one thing to see Lucifer crafting the body; then it had just been an inanimate object. Nothing special. But now it was a living, breathing- well, struggling for breath like a drowning man pulled from the sea- person. Lucifer had actually created life. Or given a soul new life, anyway. Part of me still struggled to believe that this was Alec.

The body's gasping slowed, settling into a more regular rhythm. Lucifer grinned, then pushed the new Alec towards me with surprisingly little care for what he had just created. Then again, he was a demon. They don't really care for things. Alec fell, and I caught him, momentarily thrown off by his weight, and lowered him gently to the floor. He was surprisingly heavy, but I managed. His eyes were still closed, and he didn't react. Unconscious.

"He will wake in due time." Lucifer was looking on with mild curiosity, watching as I sat cross-legged, pulling Alec close and resting his head in my lap, stroking his dark hair gently. He was warm, and I had to resist the urge to hug him close, to revel in the heat of life that came from his new body. Instead, I studied his pale face closely. His skin was baby-soft, new and free of weathering or scars. His closed eyelids were a delicate light purplish colour, and I swore I could see the intense blue of his eyes underneath. His unkempt, roughly-cut, dark hair contrasted with the pale tint of his skin. There was slight colour in his cheeks, a soft pinkish colour, not quite enough to be a blush, and his lips were slightly parted. I remembered seeing him like this before, when I woke up beside him in the mornings, and he was still asleep. All of the seriousness and worry melted out of his features then, and left them serene. I loved him like this. So vulnerable and peaceful. I could have stared at him all day, had Lucifer's harsh voice not broken me out of my reverie.

"I have performed the task you asked of me, and received my payment. Release me, Bane." Hardly able to speak, I looked up.

"Th... Thank you," The words caught in my throat.

"Your sacrifice was thanks enough. Now release me." I nodded, and began to chant the releasing spell, still holding onto Alec and watching as the outlines of the pentagram shone, and Lucifer slowly disintegrated, returning to the Void. By the time I had finished the chant, both Lucifer and the pentagram were gone, leaving nothing but the burning scent of sulphur behind.

I stared at the slightly singed floorboards, now somehow clean and blank once more. They only held my attention for a brief moment before my eyes were drawn once more to Alec, his peaceful face relaxed in his unconscious state. I brushed a stray strand of dark hair from his forehead gently. How long would it be until he woke? Hours? Minutes?

Barely after I had asked myself this question, his body shifted, and eyelids fluttered. I jerked my hand away from his face like I had been shocked. He moaned softly, and his eyes opened.

I did a double take. His eyes were... were black! Dead black... I only looked for a second, then closed my eyes, suddenly scared. But then I looked a second time, and was staring into the same blue eyes I knew and loved. I must have been hallucinating. I assured myself I was just shaken up by this whole experience, and relaxed.

Those eyes took a moment to focus, then his expression changed rapidly, from fear to joy to confusion, and he sat bolt upright with a start.

"Magnus?!" His voice cracked slightly. I wasn't sure whether it was because of emotion or disuse. Maybe both. I nodded, struck dumb. The sight of him, alive, conscious and well brought tears to my eyes suddenly, and I blinked multiple times, trying to will them away but failing, and feeling them spill over onto my cheeks. His face creased into a frown. "Magnus... Why are you crying?" He looked first at me, then around the room, then down at himself, trying to figure out what was going on. He gave a shriek as he realised he was wearing no clothes, and tried to cover himself with his hands, cheeks flushing bright red. "WHY AM I NAKED?!" He looked mortified and angry. I couldn't help it. I smiled slightly, and choked out a laugh through the tears.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before, you silly boy."

"STILL!" He hugged his knees to his chest, staring sulkily at his legs. Then he uncoiled, examining himself closely as horror dawned in his eyes. "Wh... Where are my marks?" I opened my mouth to reply, but no sound came out. What should I tell him? How do you tell someone that they died? "Magnus... What did you do to me?" His voice had become dead serious, and he locked his darkened eyes to mine.

"I... Healed you..." I forced the words out. His frown deepened as he tried to remember what had happened.

"But... You hated me... You didn't help... Did you?" My throat constricted at his words.

"I could never hate you, Alexander." His expression softened. "Not if I tried."

"Then... That was really you? You were really there?" Now it was my turn to be confused.

"What do you remember?"

"I remember... I was injured. I was in the Institute, and I couldn't, wouldn't move. Jace and Izzy... They were there. And then I began- or I thought I began- to hallucinate. I saw you. Only you, and black. The black... It felt like a weight, crushing me. I couldn't think, couldn't concentrate anymore because of it, and I guess I passed out, because next thing I know, I'm here." I swallowed. He had to know. I couldn't not tell him- he'd find out eventually anyway.

"Alec..." He looked up, meeting my eyes. "You didn't pass out... You died." I watched cautiously as he struggled to comprehend what I had said. My heartbeat felt both loud and weak, beating in a hollow chest.

"I... Died? I'm dead?" I shook my head.

"No. Not... Not any more." He frowned, studying my expression for clues as to what happened.

"Magnus... Did you... Bring me back?" I nodded dumbly. "You..." He seemed lost for words, his face a mess of emotions fighting with one another. Apparently anger won. "You idiot! Do you know how dangerous that is? By all rights it should be impossible! And for what? Me? The man you've been avoiding for the past few months? The one you told you never wanted to see again?! What if you'd died too, then what?" I was taken aback by his sudden outburst, and I failed to respond. "Why, Magnus? Why would you put yourself at risk like that? And don't tell me it doesn't matter because you succeeded, because you shouldn't have tried in the first place."

"I..." Words failed me. How could I put into words how I'd felt for the past week? "I didn't have anything to lose." He looked incredulous.

"Yes you did! Your life!"

"I didn't care... Didn't want it anymore... Not without you... I don't want to live in a world where I have to bury everyone I love... Especially not you." I put a hand up to my cheek, wiping away the tears, seeing a black smudge of makeup on my fingers.

"Magnus..." He was a lot quieter now, and he approached me carefully, as if I was a timid wild animal who might run away from him if he got too close. I sniffed, trying to stop the tears. "You really feel like that?" He sat right in front of me, and when I looked away, staring at the floor and hiding my face, he put his hand to my cheek, brushing away the black-stained tears with his thumb. "Hey..." His voice was soft, comforting. "You've lost loves before, haven't you? Don't you know how to deal with this?"

"I've told you, Alexander. Don't you believe me? You're not like the rest. You're special. You're the one I want forever. And I would never be ready to lose you." Before I knew what was happening, I had pulled him close, so our faces were almost touching, and I felt like I was drowning in his eyes. Then we were kissing, a heated, passionate kiss like nothing I had ever experienced in my long centuries, a kiss full of longing and worry and anger and grief and joy and lost love regained. He knotted his fingers in my hair, twisting the long strands and pulling lightly, not enough to hurt, but enough to send a thrill through me. He was now straddling my waist, and I could feel the heat of his skin through my thin shirt. I began to trace the lines of his hips with my fingertips, but he stiffened at my touch, pulling away. "Alec?" I looked up at him, confused and a little hurt. He was flushed, panting slightly, but he avoided my gaze, staring downwards.

"No... Magnus, we can't..."

"Why not?" He looked up, an intensely sad expression on his face.

"The last time I saw you, you told me you never wanted to see me again. You walked away from me. You can't just pretend that didn't happen. You broke my heart, Magnus, and that kind of injury isn't easy to fix." I felt the warmth drain out of me. "And that doesn't even begin to cover the fact that you broke Covenant law. If the Clave finds out..." His voice broke. "Magnus, they'll kill you. You'll be classified as a rogue Downworlder and murdered."

"I know." I sounded like an admonished toddler. He sighed, getting off of me.

"Maybe we can try again someday, but we need to fix our problems first." I closed my eyes, allowing myself the smallest glimmer of hope, and the vow that I would do whatever it took for him to forgive me. I heard another sigh, and then felt a hand under my chin, tilting my head up, and the soft brush of lips on mine, gentle and fleeting. I opened my eyes again, and Alec was looking at me, tears in his own eyes. I put a hand up to touch his cheek gently. "Aku cinta kamu, Magnus." I smiled sadly.

"Not that that changes anything..." He shook his head. I let my hand fall, my eyes on the floor.

"And Magnus?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you lend me some clothes, please?"


	7. Newborn

Alec POV

I stood in front of the mirror, staring at my reflection. Magnus had given me some clothes- his most modest pair of worn jeans and a black T shirt with only a simple pattern on the front- and left me to change in his room. Being back here sent a thrill through me. It was both amazing and painful. My mind was whirling with all that had happened, from Magnus's kiss to my rejection to the small matter of my death. I didn't quite believe that that had actually happened. After all, I thought necromancy was impossible. To think that... That I had died, and been brought back... It gave me a headache.

My reflection stared back at me, familiar yet so different. It was the same me; same face, same eyes, same body, yet no marks. Those vivid swirls and patterns had decorated my skin since I got my first mark at the age of 12. My Voyance rune, the one that marked me as a Shadowhunter. Gone. What did that mean for me? We knew that when Raziel brought Jace back, he had been stripped of the rites of protection that prevented demonic possession or negative influence, but he still had his marks. Did this mean I was no longer a Shadowhunter? Was I... Was I a mundane? Stripped of my marks forever?

That thought swept through my head like a tsunami, and I had to sit down on the end of my bed. I half expected my reflection to stay standing, since it didn't seem like my reflection anymore, but the pale, undecorated body folded in with the same awkward grace as mine.

How had he done it? How had he accomplished what so many others before him had failed to do? I put a shaking hand to my chest, feeling my beating heart beneath my palm. Had it really stopped? The thought was just so... So wrong. So impossible. I resolved to ask him about it as soon as possible.

Pulling on the jeans and shirt, I ran my fingers through my hair and steadied myself to go out and get some answers from my boyf-  
I winced.  
\- ex-boyfriend.

"Hey." As soon as I had opened the door, Magnus had looked up from arranging furniture around the no longer empty room that I had woken up in. Half-smiling in response, I couldn't help but notice once again how dreadful he looked. Gone was the perfectly-preened, confident and exuberant warlock, and someone completely different was in his place. This man looked drained. His hair was unruly and long, his posture that of someone who'd recently suffered. Quite a lot, too. His normally perfect makeup was smudged and I could see through the layers of foundation and powder that it was hiding marked skin. Seeing Magnus like this was heartbreaking, and made the possibility of my death seem more believable, somehow. I didn't think just a breakup could do this to him. He seemed to be fitting out the room in furniture designed for comfort rather than style; a large reclining sofa, footrests and a flat-screen TV were already in place, and he was currently pushing a moderately sized coffee table into the centre of the room.

I approached him, unsure of exactly what to say. He looked up expectantly, and I felt myself blush. "Uh... Magnus?"

"Yes darling?" My heart jumped, and I wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans.

"...Don't call me that. But... I want to know what happened. Tell me what happened, please." To anyone else, Magnus's face would have been impossible to read. But I noticed the slight twitch of his lips and the darkening of his gold-green eyes that meant this was a subject he did not want to discuss. I'd seen that look too many times before, and I was not going to let him evade this topic too.

"Alexander... The past week has been very difficult for me."

"Magnus, you can't get out of this. Not again. I died! You can at least tell me what happened!"

He sighed, sitting back on the new sofa and hiding his face in his hands. "Alright. I suppose you have a right to know. Please, sit." I did so.

"Alec... Where do I begin? Ever since I... Ever since that night, I've been a mess. I was at war with myself. I couldn't decide what was better- going and facing you after everything that happened, or waking up every morning to an empty bed, knowing I'd have to live through another day without you. My only comfort was that I might muster up the courage to speak to you again someday. But it was always someday, never that day. I'd cut myself off from you, not speaking to anyone who knew you. That's why I never knew what was happening. It wasn't until I got the call from Isabelle that I even knew there was something wrong. Yes, I got your calls at first. I was almost relieved each time you hung up, because it meant I wouldn't have to talk to you. And when you stopped calling, I was sad, but I was also relieved, because I thought it meant you were moving on. Getting over me. I didn't dream that anything had happened to you. They say that you know when the one you love is in mortal danger. That's not true." I felt my insides twist in guilt at the the word 'love'. It didn't seem fair that, after all I had done, he still loved me.

"So Isabelle called you?"

"Yes. She told me you were in a sort of coma, and that I was her last resort. She seemed to think that just because we were no longer together, I would no longer be willing to heal you. She offered to pay me whatever money she could get her hands on. Anything if it meant I could give her her brother back." He was picking at his fingernails now, looking dejected. "I guess it's a good thing she didn't pay me, because I failed.

"I rushed over as soon as she hung up, and she took me up to your infirmary. I saw you there, laying on that bed, pale as Death himself and eyes wide open, and I thought I was too late. Even so, I went straight to your side, prepared to do anything I could to save you. I could only have been there a few minutes..." His voice trailed off, and he stared blankly at his hands with wet eyes. I held back the urge to comfort him. "I watched as the light left your eyes. Somehow I knew, even though to some there might have been no visible change. Suddenly there was nothing.

"I was desperate. I checked for a pulse, but still nothing. I did CPR on you, I don't know for how long. All I remember is trying to force the life back into you, trying to make you come back, then Jace was pulling me away. I fought him, but he wouldn't let go. When the realisation that you were gone hit me, I broke. I literally felt my heart break. You don't realise how accurate that expression is until you feel it yourself. It was the worst feeling I've ever experienced. Worse than any breakup. Worse than getting stabbed. Worse even than having your own father try to kill you. And the fact that you'd died thinking I'd hated you made it so much worse." He was crying now, the tears rolling down his cheeks. They left tracks in the layers of makeup he'd slathered on his face. "The next week was hell. I just couldn't face the fact that I'd lost you. Suddenly nothing mattered anymore. I didn't go out, didn't talk to anyone, didn't do anything but stay in and watch crappy TV by myself. I even neglected the Chairman. I need to make that up to him, actually." He half smiled reluctantly. "It was like that for a week, then Jace and Clary showed up, and invited me to your funeral. I felt out of place, but I even said a few words in front of your friends and family. I wondered if you were watching me, wherever you are." I was close to tears myself now. My heart felt as heavy as lead.

"Magnus..."

"That was when I realised how I couldn't live without you. I didn't want to face eternity with you six feet under. Not that they buried you. Shadowhunters don't do that."

"They burned me?" I asked incredulously. He nodded.

I guess that explained why I didn't have any marks then. This was a brand new body.

"I vowed to get you back somehow. And I did." He smiled at me. I narrowed my eyes.

"How?"

"I... Spoke to my father..." I blinked.

"Your father?"

"...Lucifer." I stared.

"Lucifer the king of hell?! The one so rarely seen he doesn't even have an entry in the codex?! I thought he was just a scary story told by children!"

"Well, half my genes come from your so-called 'scary story'."

I was speechless.

"...Alec?"

"Um... Ah... And... He brought me back?"

"Yeah."

"...Wow." I leaned back on the sofa, trying to take this information in and failing. After a moment of silence, I bit my lip, stating, "I need a drink." Magnus conjured a coffee, and held it out for me, but I waved it away. "Something stronger." He raised an eyebrow, but replaced the coffee with a glass of some sort of liquor. I took a sip, and felt the burn go down my throat and spread throughout my chest. I normally don't drink, but I figure that since I just died, I would let myself have one or two.

About an hour (and several glasses) later, my head was feeling pleasantly warm and fuzzy, and I was happily chatting away with Magnus about nothing in particular. He'd had a few himself, and seemed to be in the giggly stage of drunkenness.

"H... Hey Magnus?" He grinned.

"Yes, my love?"

"Am I gonna have to stay here for like, ever? Cuz I'm dead?" He giggled.

"You're not dead silly! An' you can't stay here forever, cuz that'd get boring, wouldn't it?" His face went still for a moment, then split into a devious smile. "You could climb through Izzy's window an' scare her like a ghost!" He waved his hands around in front of his face, "WoooOOOOoooo Isabelle... I'm a ghost come to haunt you forEEEverrrrrrr!" He burst out laughing at the apparently hilarious mental image. I frowned.

"Tha's not very nice. 'N she wouldn't be scared anyway. She'd probably hit me." I grimaced. "A lot."

He made an irritated noise. "Ugh you're such a buzzkill Alec."

"Am not!"

"Are too. You're always like this law and that law and no that's not nice and tell me all your secrets or I'll sulk at you." My face fell.

"You really think that?" He instantly stopped pouting when he saw my expression, and crawled over the sofa to stroke my hair. "Stop it. 'M not the Chairman."

"No. You're sad. No sadness. Not allowed." He stopped stroking to pull me into his arms. I didn't return the hug, crossing my arms instead. "You're not always a buzzkill Alec. You're cute and sweet and funny and amazing and I love you."

"If you loved me there wouldn't be any secrets to have to tell..."

"Aleeeeec..." He moaned, and I looked up at him dejectedly. "I made you alive again. I could've died but I didn't and I brought you back. If I didn' love you I wouldn' have done that."

I bit my lower lip, confused by my own feelings. "Magnus?"

"Yes biscuit?"

"Love you too..." The second the words were out of my mouth, he beamed.

"You do?"

"'F course. Never stopped." His face was close enough now that had I leaned forward an inch, we would have bumped noses. I looked into his eyes, and I saw them spark. His eyes really were beautiful, I realised. Intensely dark, slitted pupils rested in the centre like a tear in the iris. The colour changed with his emotions, and right now they were burning gold, glowing slightly in the semi-darkness. I could see a tiny hint of green around the edge of the iris, fighting with the gold. I found myself leaning in closer, and then our lips met, and I felt the burn of the alcohol get stronger, added to by the fire of passion. He climbed on top of me, hands pawing at my shirt, long fingers creeping up over the skin underneath. I shivered at his cool touch, the feather-light brushes sending jolts through me, making me twitch, arch my back and press my body to his. My own fingers found their way to the back of his neck and teased through the fine, downy hair there. His lips moved against mine urgently, and I felt his teeth bite gently on my lower lip before I stopped him with my tongue. His pushed back, and I relented, letting him explore my mouth. By this time, his hands were on my chest, my shirt pushed up, and he ran his thumb over my nipple. I let out a tiny gasp at the sudden shock, and he growled against my mouth, doing it again. I pulled at his hair as he continued to play with the sensitive spot, pinching at it and teasing it with a fingernail. When I broke the kiss, tilting my head back and closing my eyes, he took the opportunity to mark my throat, revelling in my little twitches and gasps every time he bit down.

After continuing this for a while, he seemed to make a decision, and stood up, scooping me up into his arms and taking me into his bedroom. He dropped me unceremoniously onto the bed, then climbed on top once again. I could feel the hot hardness between his legs as he straddled me, pushing up my shirt before pulling it off completely. It was thrown somewhere to his right, then his mouth was on my chest, licking and kissing. I let out a cry as he bit down hard, feeling tears in my eyes. It hurt, but it felt good. He practically ripped off his own shirt, placing my hands on his hips. I traced them gently, and he leaned in, inviting me to touch him. I did. He shivered when my hands pressed up against his navel-less stomach. I could see the scar where he'd been stabbed by Amatis, and I traced it with the tip of a finger. He moaned softly, and leaned in to kiss me again, caramel fingers dancing down to fiddle with the button on my jeans. I helped, and soon his hand dipped below the waistband. I clenched my teeth as he touched me, nearly bucking at the sudden pleasure. I felt his breath on my neck, his hair tickling my cheek as he murmured in my ear.

"No underwear, eh? You bad boy..."

Through my clouded thoughts and the steady, burning pleasure building in my abdomen, I could barely think. But still I managed to choke out, "Y... You didn't lend me any..."

"Didn't I? Silly me." His hand wrapped around my dick and long fingers stroked gently. I let out a thin moan, my head thrown back against the pillows. He let go, and I felt him tugging at my jeans, pulling them off. I felt goosebumps rise on my arms and legs as the cool air could now reach every part of my anatomy. He giggled. "I missed this."

"Wh... What?"

"This." He kissed the head gently, and I shivered.

"'S that all you missed?"

"Of course not. Silly Alexander." Before I could reply, he stuck out his tongue and licked. I yelped. He grinned, and trailed the tip of his tongue up the underside, teasing a particularly sensitive spot. My breathing sped up, my fingers knotting in the sheets as he lowered his head slowly, taking the whole thing into his mouth. I'd forgotten how good this felt. The wet heat was enough to make me moan loudly and clench my fists. He began to move, pulling back so that his lips barely grazed the top before going all the way back down again. It was taking all of my self control not to buck into his mouth. Instead I squirmed on the bed, wrapping my legs around him and pulling roughly at his hair. He sucked hard, and I cried out, my back arching, pushing my body towards him. My insides were on fire, pressure building in my stomach. I was panting hard, my heartbeat racing at the electric sensations running through me. I both felt and heard Magnus's moan, and I looked down to see he had unzipped his own jeans, and was grasping his impressive length firmly, stroking up and down in the same rhythm that his lips moved on mine. It was an incredibly erotic sight, and when he looked up, burning, lust-filled golden eyes met mine and I shuddered, the pressure building to an unbearable level.

"Mag... Magnus... I..." His teeth scraped my shaft gently, and set off one last key spark, causing me to scream, coming hard. White-hot bolts of pleasure electrified every nerve in my body. The convulsions of his throat as he swallowed around me drew out the orgasm, every muscle in my body tensing up. When he finally drew back, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and grinning, I melted, the tension leaving me like a flood. Magnus crawled up to kiss me, and I could taste bitter saltiness on his tongue. He broke off, looking down at me with heavy-lidded eyes.

"Alec..." His voice was breathy, lustful.

"Magnus..." I felt like warm butter, ready to melt at the slightest pressure. The afterglow had left me contented and relaxed, but I could see that Magnus was far from satisfied. He kissed me again, hard. Although my body was almost unresponsive, I managed to push his jeans and underwear off his hips, but didn't get them very far. Instead, he had to get them off himself, getting impatient and kicking them off. Now fully exposed, he pressed his body to mine, his skin hot and feverish. His kissing was frenzied, all tongue and teeth, and he moved against me, desperate for friction. His lips moved from my mouth to my neck, just below my ear. It was a sensitive spot, and I whimpered quietly. He growled.

"I want you Alec... I want to be inside you..." Even as the afterglow faded, I felt the heat build again.

"Do it." That was all the conformation he needed. He held three fingers up to my face, and I took them into my mouth, licking them gratuitously, covering them in saliva. When he was satisfied, he trailed his index finger down my chest, my stomach, between my legs. When he pushed it inside me, I winced, my muscles clenching around the digit. I'd forgotten- my new body had never done this. I was essentially a virgin again. And it hurt.

"Relax, baby..." I tried, breathing evenly and letting my body loosen up. When he was sure I was ready, he began to move it, curling and uncurling it, caressing my insides. There was a dull pain, but I had a high pain threshold so it didn't bother me much. Instead, I tried to focus on the pleasant sensation of his finger tickling the oversensitized skin inside me. When I nodded consent, he added a second, causing me to gasp. I could feel them moving inside me, the peculiar yet pleasant feeling leaving me wanting more. I was beginning to get into it, closing my eyes and shifting, moving onto his hand, when he brushed that spot inside me that made me stiffen and bite my lip hard enough that I tasted blood in my mouth. In response, I felt him change the angle he thrusted his fingers in and out, hitting that spot. I moaned. He circled it with a fingertip, driving me crazy as he teased. Then he added a third finger, stretching my insides and adding pain to the building pleasure. I felt sweat running down my temple as he continued to torture me. I gritted my teeth, holding back my moans as my temperature rose. I wanted more.

"Magnus!" I whined, "Please! I need you..." He grinned at me, lining himself up. When he pushed in the first couple of inches, I cried out, eyes wide. It burned. Instantly he was on me, kissing me gently, hand on my erection, trying to take my mind off the pain. The mixed sensations overwhelmed my senses. He continued to push in until he was fully sheathed inside me. My lungs began to strain and I realised I'd been holding my breath. I let it out, then breathed in again, slowly and steadily, forcing myself to relax for him. I'd forgotten how much it hurt the first time. Eventually, although the pain had not decreased, I felt the desire for friction, and gritted my teeth.

"Move."

"You sure? I can wait..." His voice betrayed otherwise.

"Do it. Fuck me." It was as if a cord had been cut. He pulled out, then slammed in again hard. I yelped, but he did it again, knowing I could take the pain, or not caring. He was too lost in desire. As I grew accustomed to the burn, I could appreciate the experience properly. My walls were tight around his length, and that meant I could feel every imperfection, every bump and ridge as it stroked my insides. It sparked pleasure through me, and I felt my lust increasing. "More! Harder!" He complied. Now his hand was pumping my erection in time with his thrusts, and his other hand lifted my leg, pushing it back against my body so my knee almost touched my chest. This position gave him a new angle, and as he thrust in once more, he hit my prostate nearly dead-on. I felt pleasure rip through me, and I screamed his name. He continued to relentlessly hit that spot, and I felt I would black out. The pleasure was almost too much to bear. He let out a series of animalistic grunts and moans as he hammered into me, and I knew he was close. But I was more than close. I bucked into his hand, ready to come a second time, when his grip tightened around the base. I screamed frustration at him, the need for release driving me mad. He went harder, faster, deeper, still hitting my prostate with every thrust. I met every movement with one of my own, fingernails clawing at his back, craving, needing release. His movements became erratic, off-rhythm, signalling his imminent orgasm. Just as he reached the point of no return, he let go of me.

I lost it.

Screaming his name as loud as I could, I came hard, staining both our chests with white, crushing his body to mine. The clenching of my muscles around him pushed him over the edge too, and his cries mixed with mine. I felt the explosion of warmth deep inside me, and he continued to thrust a few more times, drawing out the high, before collapsing on top of me. We were both sweaty and breathing as if we'd just run a marathon at a sprint the whole time. We stayed like that for a few moments before he pulled out, rolling over. I let out a small noise of complaint, resting my cheek on his chest. He put his arms around me, holding me against him. Not another word was said, but slowly I drifted off to the familiar and comforting rhythm of Magnus's heart.


	8. Reconciliation

Alec POV

The first thing that registered in my mind as I awoke was pain. My head was throbbing and my throat was dry- the telltale signs of a hangover. I shifted slightly and immediately froze as my lower half seized up, aching like each of my muscles had been beaten with a steak tenderiser. Groaning, I rolled over and came face to face with a sleeping Magnus. I jumped a little, still slightly sleep-disorientated. His makeup formed black panda eyes where it had been smudged, and his longer-than-usual hair fell across his face, looking windswept and tangled. The duvet was pulled back slightly, revealing his bare back; he was asleep on his front. His shoulder blades were prominent, and I could just about see the ridges of his spine. On either side of it were vicious red lines. Scratches. Some even broke the skin. Blushing, I looked at my fingernails. Sure enough, a few were encrusted with tiny amounts of blood. Bracing myself, I sat up and swung my legs over the edge of the bed, looking down at my body. I needed a shower. Badly.

Trying not to wake Magnus, I pushed myself up into my feet, wincing as my abused legs shook, and took a few, very careful steps to the door. My body protested, but I continued, opening the door to the bathroom as quietly as possible and stepping in, closing it behind me. Once in, I started the shower running and found a clean towel. When the water was sufficiently heated, I stepped in. It was a large shower, plenty of space to move around in, and I stretched out each of my limbs, testing them. My arms seemed fine, but my legs and lower back were incredibly sore. I thought back. The details of the previous night were hazy, but I remembered enough to make me blush, and all the evidence was there anyway.

The hot water was soothing and washed the tension from my body. I found some shampoo- citrus scented, I noticed; he'd probably gone off sandalwood since our breakup- and began to wash my hair.

I was rinsing the bubbles out when I heard the door open. I could see a dark shape through the steamed-up screen. It approached, pulled back the screen, and a very naked Magnus Bane stepped into the shower beside me. I had to stop my eyes from moving downwards as he smirked and ran a hand through his now wet hair.

"Morning sweet pea." I tried to roll my eyes and turn the other way as if this didn't bother me at all, but the shower head was now spraying water directly into my face, and I quickly turned back, rubbing my eyes in shame.

"I thought I said no to that one."

"Sorry biscuit, it just slipped out." I glared at him as venomously as I could manage. He grinned.

"Why are you in here, anyway? Couldn't you wait your turn?" He shrugged.

"Plenty of room, isn't there? Besides, this is so much more entertaining." His eyes travelled over my body, taking it all in appreciatively. I crossed my arms.

"Don't think that just because of last night you can get away with this. I still need time."

He sighed. "Alright, but even if we're not really together, we're not really not together either, are we? We're in a sort of..." He waved his hand around in an abstract motion, "relationship limbo, if you like." I rolled my eyes. "Now come here. You need cleaning up." He picked up a bottle of body wash and squirted some into his palm.

"Magnus, really? I'm perfectly capable of washing myself."

"Yeah but you'll enjoy it more if I do it." He winked, water dripping off dark eyelashes. I huffed, but let him touch me. He ran his soapy hands over my chest, lathering up my skin and washing away the remnants of last night's activities. His touch was light, and it tickled slightly. His hands trailed over my chest, my shoulders, down my back. They rested for a moment at the base of my spine, and he pulled me close. My skin was slick against his, nothing but a thin layer of soap between us. I tried to push him away half-heartedly, but he held me against him. "What are we doing, Alexander? Why are we making this so difficult?" He looked down at me with sad eyes, eyes that held long years of disappointment and tragedy. I was shocked to see so much emotion in them, when he'd been making jokes just moments before. It was the first time I truly understood what he'd been through. What I put him through. I could see he loved me, and every rejection pushed the knife in a little bit deeper. He was good at hiding it, but when he chose to show it, like now, he showed everything. Suddenly I felt guilty.

"Magnus..."

"Alec, don't. Don't make excuses. I know. I know I hurt you. But don't lie and say you don't want this. You don't want me. Last night, you told me you loved me. And if there's one thing I've learned, it's that drunk words are sober thoughts."

"Magnus, I..." I didn't know what to say. He put a finger to my lips, silencing me. Then he leaned down, gold-green eyes sad but hopeful, and kissed me. I was unresponsive, unsure of what to do as his arm encircled my waist, pressing my body up against his, his other hand going up to my neck, fingers in my hair. He kissed me gently but desperately, trying to elicit a reaction. I was having a mental battle with myself. Part of me wanted to push him away, to tell him he couldn't force me into something I wasn't ready for. The other part wanted to wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him as passionately as I could, to tell him I loved him and to never let him go again. I could feel water dripping down my cheeks, running over my eyelashes. After quite some time, and still no reaction from me, he broke off.

"Alec?" I looked down, unable to meet his eyes. "Alec, please say something. Tell me how you feel."

"I..." My hands were on his chest, tracing the familiar patterns of his abs. "I want you, but there's too many complications. Our relationship has been difficult. I just feel like you don't trust me, or maybe I don't trust you. And... I can't just forget the fact that you broke the law to bring me back. By all rights I shouldn't be here right now. I should be dead. That's a big deal."

"But why can't we work through it together? It's obvious we both want this, and yes, we have problems, but we're only going to add to them if we try and stay apart. I need you, Alec. I've never been this dependant on another person before. It scares me, because I know exactly what would happen if I lost you, because it's already happened. And I fought for you, and I got you back, and I can't lose you again. You're the only thing holding me together. So I'm asking you to help me. To fix me. Please. If we work together we can make it work. And I promise I'll tell you all I can. Anything you ask." I'd never seen him like this before, so desperate. I knew he was being open with me, in a way he rarely ever was. But I, being me, and terrible with words, could not fathom what I could possibly say to make it better. So I didn't say anything. I put my arms around him and hugged him tightly, burying my face in his shoulder. I could feel his heartbeat against my own, his thin body warm in my arms. He hugged me back, and we stayed like that for a while, before I let go.

"You know, we've been in here for ages. Your water bill's gonna skyrocket."

"Honestly, Alexander, the water bill's the last thing on my mind right now." Even so, he picked up the bottle of body wash once more. Before he could squirt some on his hand, though, I took it from him. "I think it's my turn." Applying a liberal amount and lathering it up slightly between my palms, I began to wash him, scrubbing every inch of his skin clean. He had closed his eyes, and seemed to be enjoying the feeling of my hands on his body. I smiled slightly, feeling mischievous, and wanting to make up for my previous behavior. I wondered how much I could get away with, as I ran my soapy hand between his legs. He gasped. "Alexander..."

"What? We have to get all of you clean." I did it again. He looked down at me, one eyebrow raised. "Is this your way of saying yes?" I struggled to find a decent reply, blushing furiously and mentally tripping over myself.

"I guess I'm okay with trying."

He gave me a long look of both exasperation and joy. "You know, Alexander, there are much more eloquent ways of saying you want to get back with your boyfriend."

"I'm not good with words." I bit my lip. "Are you objecting?" I pulled my hand away, but he quickly grabbed my wrist and put it back.

"I never said that." I smiled and pulled him closer. His hands moved over my body, down over my back, my arse, to my thighs. Then, without warning, he picked me up, pushing my back against the wall and moving closer so I was pinned there by his body. I gasped at the cold temperature of the tiles in contrast to the water, but wrapped my legs around his waist happily, feeling his already half-hard state. He kissed me gently, and I teased knots out of his long hair. When I broke the kiss, he moved down to my throat. He bit down on my pulse point, and I bit my lip at the sensation.

"I'm still sore from yesterday, you know."

"What, down here?" His hand slid up from my thigh to my arse, and I nodded. "Aww, poor baby. You know what'll make it better?" As I looked up, he grinned, growling slightly. "Making it worse." He pushed a soap-slicked finger inside me. I moaned as he found my prostate almost immediately. He grazed my earlobe with his teeth. "I love those little noises you make." My eyelids fluttered, my head back against the wall. He fingered me roughly, enticing more moans out of me.

"Ma... Magnus... More..." I implored him. He dragged his fingertips over that spot, his fingernails creating intense sensations that wracked my body. I pulled at his hair, feeling his hipbones digging into my thighs where my legs wrapped around his waist. He added another finger, then another, and I could feel myself stretching to accommodate him. It hurt, but it was a delicious pain. As he constantly teased my prostate, I found myself moving against him, finding friction by grinding my body on his, although I wanted more. I wanted him inside me. I voiced as much, and he grinned, pulling out his fingers and lowering his face to mark my throat as he pushed me up higher, teasing my entrance with the head of his dick. I bit my lip to keep from crying out, my whole body screaming for contact. He bit down hard on a spot just above my collarbone, prompting a gasp out of me. I didn't want to wait anymore. I tried to move, but he had me pinned. He grinned wickedly, reaching a hand between us to stroke me too gently, knowing it was enough to set my nerves tingling, but not enough to satisfy. I squirmed against him, moving as much as I could in order to get more friction, but it wasn't enough. Magnus leaned down.

"What do you want?" His voice was husky.

"I... I want you..." My own voice shook with lust and desperation.

"Beg for me." His eyes sparked. I bit my lip, meeting his gaze imploringly. A smile twitched at the corner of his mouth.

"Magnus... Please..." I whined, leaning forward, aching to kiss him. Still we made eye contact, and I knew he loved it when I did this. "Magnus... I need you... Please, give it to me..." I felt him twitch, a whole new level of lust igniting inside him, and, all of a sudden, he let me fall. I screamed, his entire length filling me as he pushed into me. I felt the cool tiles sliding against my skin as he took me up against the wall. His arms wrapped around my thighs, supporting my weight as he thrust against me. I still burned from last night, and now he added to that, my insides hugging his length tightly. My nerves sparked every time he moved, and I moaned in time with his thrusts. He kissed me roughly, messily. I responded in kind. I felt his fingernails dig into my thighs, his movements getting harder, faster. Almost subconsciously, I found myself stroking my own length, gasping into the kiss as I touched all the right places. Magnus ravaged my throat with his teeth, pure passion in his expression. My back arched off the tiles as I felt the tension inside me build. My head fell back, banging against the wall as I moaned his name. He kissed the sensitive spot below my ear, and I felt a shiver run through me. Magnus pushed into me harder, deeper, and I felt the strain on the insides of my thighs as he spread my legs wider. "Magnus... Please..." He knew what I wanted, and shifted his angle, hitting just the right spot. It payed off as I screamed, feeling almost like I'd been electrocuted. The built up tension peaked, and I let go, coming all over us. But still he didn't stop, and I could only scream his name as his every movement sent new shock waves through me. I felt like I would black out as he finally exploded inside me, and I launched into a second orgasm. His scream joined mine. I felt him buckle, dropping me. Fortunately, I found my feet, despite the weakness in my legs. I was surprised we were able to stay standing, even as we leaned against the wall, panting heavily. He grinned at me. I felt a small smile flicker across my features.

"You're not off the hook, you know." The steadiness of my voice took me by surprise. He rolled his eyes.

"Neither are you." There was a pause as we glared at each other, then we both cracked up, laughing at our state, laughing at our foolishness and our reckless love. And in that moment, I was happier than I had been in a long time.


	9. Revelation

Alec POV

After we agreed to work on our relationship, life seemed to resume as normally as possible. Magnus began taking care of himself again, even going on a strict diet and taking up exercising. "I don't just magically stay thin and beautiful, you know," he'd said when I'd asked why the fridge was full of low-fat yoghurts and celery. One time, I had woken up to the sound of music, and had gone to the lounge to find him in purple yoga pants and a very tight vest top, copying some ridiculous dance from a woman on the TV screen. Apparently it was called 'Zumba', it helps keep you fit, and I should try. I firmly declined.

Meanwhile, I had turned one of his spare rooms into an improvised training room, and, whilst I couldn't get my hands on any proper Shadowhunter weapons, I made do with whatever Magnus could supply me with. I had expected my lack of runes to impact my abilities, but I seemed just as good as before. In fact, I could have sworn I'd improved. My reflexes were faster, I was stronger and more agile. My new body seemed able to keep up with the rigorous training I'd grown accustomed to and more. And all without the runes I had been using since my first fight. I had never been extraordinarily competitive, but still, part of me desperately wanted to show Jace and Izzy. To prove to them I could be just as good.

I missed them.

Magnus and I had often discussed how to break the news to them, and so far we hadn't come up with an idea that wouldn't result in either one or both of us getting seriously injured. I got the feeling that, no matter how they found out, they would inevitably get mad at us. So, as of yet, neither of us had contacted them.

Before I knew what had happened, a week had passed. Magnus had just gotten in the shower, so I was left alone. I was practicing with throwing knives, embedding them in a target I'd painted on the wall. Finding that I could hit the centre time after time, I'd begun to practice blindfolded. I was just beginning to wish I'd had a moving target when I heard a knock on the door. Pausing, removing the blindfold, I wondered what to do. Magnus had told me not to answer the door, just in case it was someone who would recognise me and kick up a fuss, but I figured that the chances of that happening were quite low. Besides, I could probably take them on if they did. So I threw the last knife, watching as it stuck itself into the already deep dent in the centre of the target, and went to open the door. Pulling it open, I said, "If you're here to see Magnus, he's..." And stopped. Three very familiar faces stared back at me, completely dumbstruck.

"A... Alec?!" My sister gaped, then her surprise turned to fury, and she tackled me to the ground. Before I could even try to fight back, she had a seraph blade at my throat. I shrieked and tried to squirm away from it, but she had me pinned. I felt sick. "WHO ARE YOU?! WHY ARE YOU IMPERSONATING MY BROTHER?!" She screamed, and I could hear the pain in her voice. I opened my mouth to speak, but my voice had abandoned me. "ANSWER ME!"

"Izzy..." I heard Jace, and looked up to see him standing over me, looking down with calculating eyes, as if trying to figure out how this was possible. Clary stood behind him, wide-eyed and obviously confused. "Let him up. If that's really Alec..."

"ALEC IS DEAD!" There were tears in her eyes now, spilling over onto her cheeks, "HE DIED TWO WEEKS AGO! WE BURNT HIS BODY!"

"Izzy, please..." I'd found my voice again, and tried to console her, "It's me. I'm not dead. Not any more."

"What do you mean?!" She pressed the blade down on my skin, enough to hurt but not enough to actually break it. "People can't come back from the dead!"

"Actually..." Jace interrupted. She snapped at him.

"That doesn't count!"

"How doesn't it?"

"Raziel brought you back! Unless Magnus went and summoned an angel, which is highly dangerous and nigh on impossible for a Shadowhunter, let alone a Downworlder, it's not possible!"

"Izzy, it's me! Really me!" She narrowed her dark eyes at me.

"Prove it." I struggled to think of a way to do so.

"When... When I was seven, I think, and you were five, we snuck into our parents' room and went through their stuff. You found mom's makeup, and begged me to let you put it on me." I smiled slightly, despite being embarrassed at Clary and especially Jace hearing this. "I finally agreed after you threatened to tell Dad how I'd stolen his bow to practice with. You had so much fun putting all different colours of eyeshadow and lipgloss on me." She sniffed, eyes full of tears. "I made you swear to never tell anyone. And you never did. No one but the two of us ever knew about it. Do you remember?" She nodded slowly, a sad smile playing on her lips.

"You looked so pretty with that purple eyeshadow on." I laughed softly, relieved as the fury drained from her expression.

"Now, can I get up please? My legs are going dead." She began to get up, but at that precise moment Magnus decided to walk in, a towel around his waist, rubbing vigorously at wet hair with another.

"Alec, sweetheart, what's all that racket?" He looked up and froze. Jace stormed up to him, knife in hand.

"You have an awful lot of explaining to do, Bane." Magnus stepped back, hands up in surrender.

"Woah, put the knife down, Angel eyes. You could do a warlock some damage with that."

Jace snickered. "That's the point."

Izzy got off me, and helped me up. "Jace, back off. That's my boyfriend you're threatening." He turned to look at me.

"Don't think you're off the hook. And you're back together? Name of the Angel, just how much have I missed?"

"Everyone, please, take a seat." Magnus snapped his fingers, and five armchairs appeared around the fireplace. "We'll get nowhere if we just stand around threatening one another." There was a pause as they seemed to question Magnus's sanity, but finally everyone did. I noticed that, as Clary passed me, she gave me a strange look. Like she didn't trust me. I ignored it- we'd never been close, so I couldn't really blame her- and took the armchair next to Magnus's. "Now then. I imagine you all have some questions."

"Damn right." Jace narrowed his eyes. Magnus ignored him.

"I shall endeavour to answer them. Now then, shall I start from the beginning?" He began to recite the same story he'd told me the first night I'd been back in a very abbreviated fashion, leaving out several rather important things, but I didn't say anything. He then went on to talk about how we'd decided to get back together (skipping over the intimate parts, thank the Angel) and what we'd been doing since. When he had finished, he was barely given time to breathe before Izzy was asking questions.

"So... You brought Alec back?"

"Yes."

"But Magnus, necromancy is not only illegal, but impossible, isn't it?"

"Not if you have the right connections, my dear." Izzy looked confused.

"What do you mean?" Magnus ran a hand through his hair, still slightly damp. I wondered if he was planning on getting dressed at all, but he seemed perfectly happy to entertain guests in just his towel.

"Well... In order to bring him back, I spoke to a demon."

"It'd have to be a pretty powerful demon to bring back the dead," Jace chipped in, "I've never heard of one that can do that."

"It was."

"Which one was it then?" Clary looked at him with inquisitive eyes.

"...Lucifer."

There was an exclamation of surprise from all three.

"Lucifer? As in Lucifer the King of Hell?" Izzy looked both incredulous and horrorstruck. "But... How did you control him? He's said to be more powerful than Lilith and Sammael, he's the first demon!"

"Yes. He's a fallen angel, the first of demonkind, the King of Hell, and... My father." He was met by shocked silence. "He only listened to me because of that. He enjoys mocking his children, and he said that mortal love amuses him. Not that I'm mortal, but I get what he meant." He paused. "I think he meant to play a game with me by doing this, but I don't really care. So far, it's been worth it. So much more than worth it." He reached over and took my hand. I laced my fingers with his, smiling. He smiled back. "I don't know or care what sort of trick he's playing. I have my Alexander back."

"This is all very sickeningly sweet," Jace interrupted, "but something about this whole idea just reeks of corruption. It can't all be sunshine and rainbows. There has to have been a price." I thought I saw something flicker across Magnus's face, and for a second he looked like he was going to say something, but then Clary spoke up.

"Alec, where are your marks?"

"What?" I looked up, startled that someone was talking directly to me. "Oh... Well, I guess since I have a new body and all that, I don't have them anymore. Have to replace them." She nodded, still looking a little skeptical.

"Need to draw them back on?" Izzy got out her stele. "Here. Use this." She threw it at me. I put out a hand to catch it, but, as it hit my palm, I felt a shock through my arm, like static. I pulled back my hand quickly, like a burn reflex as the stele clattered to the floor. All four of my companions gave me a strange look. I flushed, picking it up, ignoring the uncomfortable feeling it seemed to give me. "Sorry... Just... It... Never mind." I trailed off, and pressed the tip to the back of my hand. I had barely started to draw the Voyance rune when I noticed something. The slight burn wasn't fading as I drew. Instead, it seemed to get worse, until it burned into my skin like acid. I dropped the stele, yelping and jumping to my feet. Instantly, Magnus was at my side, examining my hand.

"What's wrong, honey? Are you hurt?"

"I..." I was so confused. What was wrong? Why did it hurt so badly? The skin around the mark was red raw, seeming slightly blistered. Magnus was frowning. The others gathered around, all staring at my hand. Izzy was the first to speak.

"Give me your hand, Alec." Her voice was slow, pensive. I did so, letting her examine it. She traced the unfinished mark with a fingertip, making it sting slightly, and then turned my hand over so my palm faced upwards. I frowned. Then, faster than I could react, she pulled out a knife and sliced my hand open. I cried out, yanking my hand away.

"What the hell, Izzy? What was that for?!" She stood stock still for a moment, staring at me. I felt slightly uncomfortable under her gaze, glaring back.

"I know what's wrong." Her expression was grave. I frowned. "I know Lucifer's price."

"...What?"

"Look." She gestured to my hand, and I raised it. The gash in my palm dripped blood, the sticky substance coating my palm and fingers where I'd clenched my hand. Except... It wasn't blood. It was thick, black, viscous. Demon ichor. I stared. So did the others.

"Alec... You're a demon?" Clary said incredulously. I couldn't reply. I just stared at the black liquid that slid down my wrist. The same black liquid I had seen exploding from so many demon bodies. Thoughts began running through my head. That was why...

"That's why the rune didn't work. And why the stele shocked me. And..." I thought back to my training, how my abilities had seemed enhanced since I woke up, despite the lack of runes. "Why I'm stronger. Faster." I frowned. "Like..."

"Like Sebastian." Jace spat the name.

"No." I shook my head. "I'm not like him. No way. I'm a good guy. I'm part of Team Good." Jace raised an eyebrow, and Izzy half-smiled.

"You had to be there." She informed him. I intercepted a droplet of ichor as it reluctantly rolled over my hand, inspecting the opaque black liquid on the tip of my finger.

"I'm still me. I'm not a demon. Am I?" I looked up.

"No." Magnus took my hand, cleaned the ichor from my skin with a simple spell, summoned a bandage and bound the cut. "You're a Shadowhunter's soul in a demon body. Technically demons don't have souls, just energy. You're different. I watched him put your soul into that body. You're not a demon." I met his eyes.

I frowned slightly. "You saw my soul?"

"Yeah." He smiled.

"What was it like?" "Like... Like smoke, or spider silk. Fine and pure white. Strange, but beautiful." I tried to imagine that. My soul. Somehow that idea that he'd seen what was essentially the essence of my entire being seemed very intimate. I looked down at myself, then back at him. He was smiling softly. I smiled back. There was a moment of silence, then someone cleared their throat. I blinked, looking around. Jace was smirking, Izzy was tapping her foot in boredom and Clary looked downright uncomfortable. Magnus dropped my hand and turned back to them. I could swear he was blushing slightly. "...Anyway. So, obviously we'll have to figure out what this means for Alec, but from what I've seen so far it won't make too much of a difference. He's still the same person."

"Not much difference?!" My voice went up a few octaves. "I'm a demon, Magnus! One of the things my family is sworn to kill!"

"Well obviously we're not going to kill you." Jace rolled his eyes. "You're still our brother. Unless you go rogue and start murdering Shadowhunters or even Mundanes, we won't have any reason to."

"And Downworlders?" Magnus looked affronted.

"Yes, those too." He paused. "In fact, this might be to our advantage."

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

"Well, Sebastian's still out there. And if he's able to rip off an angel's wings and send them to us as a warning, he's pretty powerful too. His dark Shadowhunters are more powerful than us, but now we have someone to match that." I blinked.

"You can't expect me to take on his whole army by myself, can you?"

"Of course not, but he won't be expecting that. Expecting you. If we play our cards right, we could take him down." I considered the possibility. I didn't know what this new body was capable of just yet, just that it was in some ways better than my old one. Maybe there were other abilities I had yet to discover. I knew that Greater Demons often have unique talents, but regular common-or-garden demons don't. But then again, I wasn't exactly your run-of-the-mill demon myself. Maybe I had some powers of my own. Still, the idea of taking on Sebastian myself was a bit intimidating. I'd seen what he could do. I found myself wondering if I could die again. Apparently Magnus was thinking the same thing.

"I didn't bring Alec back just so he could go and die again. Besides, there's no guarantee we will have the element of surprise. Clearly he knows how to deal with demons, even incredibly powerful ones. What if Alec were to get hurt?"

"Well, we know that Greater Demons can reform, right?"

"It takes centuries."

"Not if someone ritually summons them and binds them together again, like Sebastian did with Lilith." I wasn't sure how to feel about this. Being scattered between dimensions didn't seem like an inviting prospect.

"So... I can't die?" I looked at Magnus. He had a pensive expression on his face, but as his eyes met mine he grinned.

"It's extraordinarily difficult to kill a demon permanently. Also, you might want to think about this: have you ever seen an aged demon?" It took me a second to realise the implications of what he'd just said.

"I'm... Immortal?"

"If other demons are anything to go by, yes." I felt a sudden surge of emotion. All those nights laying awake counting my heartbeats, all those nightmares about Magnus leaving me as I grew old, all that time staring in mirrors, hallucinating grey hairs and wrinkles. All for nothing. I was immortal. I could be with Magnus forever, neither of us growing old or dying. Suddenly the age gap between us seemed a lot less. Because one day, I could be eight hundred. It wasn't an impossible idea anymore. I felt a smile playing around the corners of my mouth, and Magnus beamed. "I'm never going to lose you again Alexander."

"Alec's going to live forever?" Izzy asked incredulously. She smiled at me, but I could see it didn't quite reach her eyes. "That's great. No more worrying about that for you two, then. No more fights." She mock-glared at Magnus. "Because I've been the one to clean up after your mess, Bane." To his credit, Magnus did have the courtesy to look suitably abashed.

"To be fair, I wasn't the one who started it." I gave him a venomous look.

"Let's move on from this topic, since it's no longer a problem."

"You should tell Samuel. He'll be delighted to have another companion to pass the ages with." I saw something spark in Izzy's eyes. A look I recognised.

"It's Simon."

Jace snorted. "Oh yes. He'll be delighted at the prospect of spending eternity with you two and your mushy, lovey-dovey nonsense."

"Trust me." Magnus had a grim look on his face. "Every companion helps." Clary looked at him strangely. I supposed that being reminded that your best friend was immortal and you were not wasn't a pleasant experience. Although it was probably slightly better than being reminded of your boyfriend's immortality. I made eye contact with Isabelle, trying to convey the message that I knew what she was going through, although part of me felt I couldn't possibly help, what with the recent revelation that I am indeed immortal and all. A smile ghosted over her lips and I knew she understood.

"Now if you don't mind, I'm going to get dressed. Entertain yourselves whilst I'm gone." Magnus kissed my cheek, then disappeared into our room. We all sat back down, and there was a moment of silence.

"...How're we gonna tell Mum and Dad?" I picked at the bandage around my hand. "I don't know about Mum, but Dad's not gonna like it... Especially not since he's the Inquisitor now, and all, and he doesn't really like Magnus anyway. He could get into serious trouble."

"Yeah..." Izzy frowned. "But we can't exactly hide it. Everyone knows - or thinks, at least - that you're dead. Unless you want to stay here for the rest of your life, you're gonna have to tell them. All of them." I balked at the idea.

"...Can it wait?"

"Not forever, but maybe if we don't address the issue head on... You know, start a few rumours, tell a few people you're back and let them find out themselves before actually presenting you to them, they might be less inclined to... Ah..."

"To imprison and/or kill me." I stated bluntly. She flinched.

"That is, if you even can be killed. If what Magnus said is right, you might just be... Temporarily inconvenienced."

"...Uh huh." I grimaced at the thought.

"But I'm sure you could be around Downworlders without attracting too much attention. It's only people you know that you might want to stay away from."

"Hey, maybe you could help us train! You know, with your demon-y powers and stuff." Jace grinned.

"What demon-y powers?"

"Well you're faster and stronger, and demons can do magic, can't they?"

"Uh..." I hadn't considered that. "I guess... But I don't know if I can. I haven't done anything particularly magical yet."

"Get Bane to teach you. It'll be fun! Might actually present me with a challenge." I rolled my eyes. Same old Jace.

"That might actually be a good idea. It'd give us a chance to train with an actual demon opponent, and it'd give you a chance to settle into your new abilities." Izzy mused.

"Of course it's a good idea. I came up with it." We ignored him.

"Okay. Where? I can't... I can't go into the Institute anymore, can I?" I felt sad at that. I'd never again be able to go into the place I grew up. "No... The Sanctuary?"

"Urgh. I hate that place." Too many bad memories. After all, that was where I had met... Her.

"Still. It's large, it's usually unoccupied, and it's safe for you to access."

"...Alright then. I suppose it'd be nice to get out. As much as I love being here." Jace smirked.

"I'll bet you do, judging from those scratches all down Bane's back." I blushed, instantly mortified. Izzy hit him.

"Jace!"

"What? It's blatantly obvious. Alec's got that beautiful necklace of bruises there, too." I covered my throat with my hand, wanting to curl up into a ball and return to wherever the hell I came from. Probably hell.

"Yes, but you don't point it out! Besides, it's not like you're completely innocent. The number of times I've walked in on you and Clary is ridiculous!" Now it was Clary's turn to go bright red and cover her face with a gaudy pillow she'd found. Jace just grinned, clearly proud of this. Izzy sighed. "There's just no winning with you, is there?"

"...Anyway." I was still flaming, but attempted to draw the conversation away from this topic. Anything but my sex life with Magnus. "So when should we meet?"

"It should be at night. There'll be less of a chance of people seeing you. Plus you're probably sensitive to sunlight now, too." I hadn't thought about that.

"I can't go out in sunlight anymore?"

"I think it would be better not to risk it..." My mind flooded with images of Abbadon crumpling in the light, as distorted as the memories were from pain and delirium. Would that be me? Would I go up in smoke? I sighed. Yet another thing to add to the list of things I have to get used to. I figured the best person to talk to would be Simon, as he'd had to deal with similar changes. Plus it might help if I made an effort to get to know him, considering it seemed like him, Magnus and I would be sticking around together for quite some time.

We continued to discuss our plans until Magnus came back, dressed in a rather tight pair of jeans and bright red vest top with 'Sexy and I know it' emblazoned across the front. He sat on the arm of my chair, an arm around me as I leaned into him.

"What're you guys talking about?"

"I'm gonna go train with them tomorrow night. Get used to my new abilities."

"Yeah?" He studied me with curious eyes. "What kind of new abilities?"

"Well, to get used to being stronger, and all that. Overestimating your strength can be dangerous. So can underestimating it. And... We were wondering if I have any other new abilities. You know, magical ones." His eyes widened.

"You think you can do magic?"

"I don't know. But lots of demons can, so it's possible."

"Wow. We'll have to test that one." He looked up. "I've been meaning to ask you," he directed his question to the other three. "Why did you come here in the first place? We've all been so preoccupied with this revelation that your original purpose was completely forgotten. You need my help with something?"

"Uh... Not exactly..." Izzy looked suddenly uncomfortable. "You see, none of us had seen you, since... Well, since the funeral. You didn't pick up any calls or ever text back, so... Well..."

"We were worried about you!" Clary blurted. Magnus stared.

"You... Were worried... About me?"

"Yeah. You looked so miserable. We thought..." She trailed off. Then it hit me. They thought Magnus had committed suicide. Over me. I felt his arm around me tense.

"Well... I'm here aren't I? I'm fine."

"Came here expecting none, found two." Jace muttered under his breath. I gave him a look.

"Indeed. I appreciate the concern, but honestly, did you really think I would sink to that level?"

"With the parting line, and I quote, 'I can't live without him', actually yeah." I blinked.

"You said that?"

"...Yes. And it was true."

"Oh..." I put a hand on his, lacing our fingers together. He smiled softly. Jace cleared his throat.

"Now that that's cleared, I assume you two will be wanting some privacy." He eyed the two of us distastefully. "Not that I approve of your defiling of my brother, Sparkles." Magnus glared at him.

"I will do exactly as much defiling as I please, thank you very much." As if to prove his point, he leaned down and kissed me full on the mouth. I returned the kiss, although I was painfully aware of three other pairs of eyes on us. Isabelle spoke up, a note of exasperation and discomfort in her voice.

"Okay, we get the idea. See you tomorrow Alec?" I broke away from Magnus to reply. "Yeah. Nine pm in the Sanctuary. Looking forward to it." She nodded, getting up. Jace and Clary followed suit. In one last protest to Magnus's 'defiling' of me, Jace pulled Clary into his arms and kissed her with just as much passion. Clary squealed, pushing him away and blushing furiously.

"Jace!"

"What? I thought you enjoyed that?"

"I do, but not with an audience!"

"Not into that, huh?" She hit him, and I couldn't help but smile as Izzy dragged them both out, rolling her eyes in my direction and giving us a wave. Magnus waved back, wiggling his fingers and grinning, and, the second the door shut, he slid smoothly into my lap.

"Well that was entertaining."

"Yeah..." I looked at him with a sombre expression.

"You really said that?"

"What?" He was momentarily taken aback. "Oh." He smiled sadly. "Yeah. But I doubt I would have actually done anything, if this had failed. I'm too much of a coward."

"You're not a coward, Magnus." I put my arms around him, and held him close. He kissed me again, oh so softly this time.

"Hey, Magnus?"

"Yes Sugar Cube?"

"Can you teach me some magic? And no to the Sugar Cube." He grinned wickedly.

"Of course, Cupcake."


	10. Magic

Magnus POV

My Alec. A demon. Who'd've thought?

I studied his sleeping face. He seemed to be taking it quite well. After Jace, Clary and Isabelle left yesterday, he got straight to learning as much about himself as he could. He knew the basics, of course, but he wanted to test them himself. More than once I had to stop him from sticking his hand out a window and burning it to a crisp. He seemed to forget that he could no longer just draw an iratze and heal himself. Although, I supposed, I could heal him if necessary.

On top of this, he'd gotten frustrated when I had tried to teach him magic, and he wasn't able to pick it up. He'd stared furiously at his palm, trying to make those little flames appear, and when he hadn't gotten a response, he'd ended up punching a hole in the wall in frustration. In that moment, I'd sworn his eyes had darkened, far more than they did in his usual bad moods. Almost black. But as quickly as it had happened, it was over, and he was looking up at me with normal, cobalt blue eyes and apologising. I waved it off, telling him it was easily fixed, but that brief flash of darkness scared me. Maybe his new body was... Temperamental. Maybe it affected him on a mental level.

I found myself analysing his features, looking for any sign that he wasn't who he used to be. His expression was relaxed, his lips slightly parted and his untidy hair falling slightly over his eyes. His breathing was regular, even. His hand rested on his bare stomach, and, despite the fact that the duvet only covered him from the waist down, he didn't seem cold. He looked... Normal. Calm. Human. I reached out, gently brushing the hair from his face. At my touch, his eyes beneath their pale lids shifted, and he moved slightly. I froze, worried I'd woken him, but he only rolled over, snuggling up to me. His skin was cool against mine as he buried his face in the crook of my neck, sighing slightly. I pulled up the covers, covering him to the shoulder and putting my arm around him. I held him close, closing my eyes and feeling him breathing, his heart beating. I would just hold him until he woke up, I thought. His warm weight in my arms, pressed up against me, was comforting.

I don't know how long I held him like that. It could have been minutes, or hours. But when he began to stir, it startled me out of a sort of half-sleep. He blinked a few times, looking up at me with bleary eyes. I smiled.

"Did I wake you up?" His voice rasped, and he cleared his throat.

"No. I was just daydreaming."

"Daydreaming? What about?"

"You."

"Yeah?"

"How amazing you are."

He smiled softly, closing his eyes again and burying his face in my chest, curling in so his arms were between his body and mine, keeping him warm. "Magnus?" His voice was muffled slightly.

"Yes, sweet pea?"

"Do you still love me?"

I frowned. "Of course. Why would I not?"

"I'm a demon..." He sounded ashamed.

I sighed. "Alec, it doesn't matter what you are, what matters is who you are. And you're Alec. You're my Alec."

"That's good..." He fell silent for a moment, before speaking up again. "Magnus?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I'll ever be able to do magic?"

"I don't know. Not all demons do magic, right?"

"I think they all can, they just don't..." He looked disgruntled, but pushed himself up. "I don't want to give up just yet."

"I'm sure we can try again." I sat up beside him.

He reached upwards, stretching, before getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom. I watched him go with a sigh. Where I was quite happy to lie around and do nothing for hours, he needed to be up and about, permanently on the go. Running a hand through my tangled hair, I got up and found a hairbrush. Teasing the knots out gently, I found some simple clothes, just a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt, and went to go find breakfast.

No sooner had I opened the door then I was set upon by a wailing Chairman, who wound around my ankles, looking up at me with bright eyes. I reached down and picked him up, scratching him behind the ears. He continued to meow at me, pawing at my shirt.

"Alright. Let's go get you some food, kitty." I carried him to the kitchen before setting him down on the countertop and finding his favourite food. He was pretty much climbing into his bowl as I opened the sachet, and attacked the meal as soon as I let him. I grinned at the tiny kitten. He'd always had an appetite twice that of a cat much bigger than him. It was a wonder he wasn't a little on the chubby side.

With the Chairman happy, I set about finding food for myself and Alec. After some deliberation, I cracked a couple of eggs into a frying pan and put on some toast. Simple and satisfying, especially when smothered in ketchup. In my opinion, anyway.

When Alec returned, rubbing viciously at his dripping hair with a towel, I served up his breakfast with a flourish.

"Thanks."

"No problem, darling." I took my place beside him, watching as he poked at the yolk of the egg until it split and leaked golden goo all over the white. "So what's the regime for today then?"

As I dug into my plate, he outlined his plans. They mainly included training, research and practicing magic. "If that's okay with you, of course." I assured him it was perfectly okay, and more entertaining than work or television.

"Oh, and Magnus?"

"Yes babe?"

"Have you actually been doing any work recently?"

"Uh, no. Not really. You're more important than that, sweetheart." I gave him my sweetest smile. He didn't look impressed.

"You do still have to pay for food and rent. I don't change that."

"Rent, yes, food, not so much." I conjured a steaming cup with a click of my fingers. "Coffee?" He just rolled his eyes at me.

"I wish you wouldn't do that."

"Do what? Utilise my resources?" I took a sip of the coffee, then winced, adding a couple of sugar cubes and stirring it.

"You should at least pay for it. It's not honest."

I sighed. "Alright, fine. I'll slip a few bucks in the tip jar next time I walk past." He glared at me. I just smiled at him until he got up, groaning exasperatedly and put his plate and cutlery in the dishwasher. I followed suit, finishing my coffee and picking up an apple and a small knife. He watched expectantly as I sliced the fruit up, popping a segment into my mouth with a grin. "So. Shall we commence our lessons straightaway?"

"Sure." I put the knife aside, leaving it on the countertop and striding past him, only pausing to hold a slice of apple between my teeth and pass it to him by means of a kiss. He let out a small laugh at that, accepting it and following me from the kitchen to his improvised training room.

"Okay," I turned to face him so abruptly he almost walked into me. "I believe yesterday we were working on conjuring objects, am I correct?" He nodded, focusing intently on me and all the advice I could give him. "Alright. Let's start easy." I sat down cross-legged on the floor, and motioned for him to sit opposite. Then I held up one of two remaining apple slices in my palm, eating the other. "Just attempt to get this from my hand to yours. Focus on the image, picture where it is and where you want it to be, then try and access the magic. Like I showed you yesterday." He nodded again, holding out his hand. I could see the concentration in his eyes, the same as when he was firing his bow, when his focus made him deadly accurate.

After an extended silence, probably about half a minute, he snapped his fingers.

Nothing happened.

He tried again, and again, and again. I watched as his mood got progressively worse as time went on. I don't know how long we spent repeating the process, going through the procedure and trying to put it into practice over and over. And still it wouldn't work.

Eventually he groaned, putting his head in his hands.

"It's not working, Magnus! I can't do it! I thought that if I took a break and calmed down, then I might be able to do it, but it hasn't done anything! I feel further from it than ever!"

"Hey, sweetheart," I tilted up his chin to meet my eyes. "Just because you're finding it difficult doesn't mean you can't do it. You are only just beginning."

"But you do it so easily!"

I gave him my best unimpressed look. "Darling, I have eight hundred years of experience under my belt. You can't go that long without perfecting your talent. Unless you are truly awful at it." He sighed. I paused for a moment, thinking. "Okay. What is it you're finding difficult?"

"I can't find the magic. You said it would be like a part of my mind I have to unlock. Well I can't find any locked parts. I don't know how to."

"If it's there, it's there. You just have to focus."

"That's what I'm doing!" He got up, and began to pace impatiently. I went to go and console him, but he brushed me off, and I was left to lean against the wall as he stared at his palm, expression hard and intense. When still nothing happened, he growled in frustration. I noticed his eyes were darkened, and a flash of his outburst yesterday hit my mind. I bit my lip.

"Honey, I think it might be best to try again in a few minutes."

"There's no point! I can't do it, can I? I'm the only demon there is that can't do any sort of magic!"

"That's not definite! I'm sure that you just need to concentra-"

"I AM!" I barely had time to process what happened. There was a flash of silver in his hand, and I heard a whoosh of displaced air, followed by a heavy thud millimetres from my cheek. My mind vaguely registered feeling a slight pain, and warmth running down the edge of my ear. I froze. Alec stared at me with feral black eyes, panting slightly, body poised as if...

As if he'd just thrown a knife.

Swallowing slightly, and glancing to my left, I saw the hilt of my fruit knife quivering next to my head, the blade almost entirely embedded in the wall. I couldn't move, couldn't speak for the shock. Alec... My Alec had thrown a knife at me. And from the amount of blade lodged into the wall, pretty damn hard as well. Had it been just a few inches further to the right, I would be dead.

Silent, I stared at my boyfriend, my eyes, wide with fear, meeting his pitch black ones. He blinked, his expression melting from rage to disbelief, and then horror.

"Magnus... I..." He lowered his hand from its outstretched position, relaxing his taut stance. He stepped back, as if scared to approach me.. Ever so slowly, I reached up and pulled the blade free, noticing the tiny amount of blood on its edge.

"...Where did you get this?" My voice was shaky and quiet, but didn't crack, to my relief.

"I don't know..." His eyes, suddenly blue again, avoided mine. "I just... I was angry, and I was thinking about the apple and how you cut it up and then the knife was in my hand and I threw it..." The words came tumbling out, one after the other, and he crossed his arms, hiding his hands by his sides, scared of himself.

"Alec..." I took a step towards him slowly, my heart giving a twinge as he flinched away from me. "You did it."

He looked up. "What?"

"You conjured the knife. You did magic."

He glanced at the blade, then at my ear. "I hurt you."

"It's okay. I've seen you throw before. You never miss. You didn't want to hurt me, because if you did, it would be a lot worse." Placing the knife on the floor carefully, I approached him, gently pulling his hands from his sides to hold them. "It's okay. I'm fine." He didn't seem convinced, so I leaned down and kissed him gently. It took a second, but he responded, letting go of my hands to wrap his arms around my neck, fingers in my hair. I pulled him close, holding him against me in an attempt to comfort him. I felt something wet on my cheek, and when he pulled away, I saw that he was trying and failing to hold back tears.

"I'm so sorry..." His hand went to my cheek, stroking my face with his thumb. "So sorry..."

I gave him a small, reassuring smile, my arms around his waist, pressing his body to mine. "It's okay. Honestly. It's barely a scratch. But I think I know what we've been doing wrong." He looked up at me inquisitively. "Your mind, or at least the part of it you are aware of, is human. It's the mind you had as a Shadowhunter. The magic comes from the inherent demonic abilities of this body. There's no point in searching your conscious mind, because it's not there. You have to use your body rather than your mind."

He frowned slightly, but nodded. "Seems logical."

Letting him go more than a little reluctantly, I stepped back, considering the apple slice still in my hand. It was a little brown from exposure to the air, and warm from the heat of my hand. "Let's get a new object to practice with." I threw away the apple, picking up the knife. I could see the apprehension in his eyes, but I reassured him. "Just stay calm and you'll be fine. Or, more importantly, I'll be fine." I grinned at him, and he half-heartedly returned it. "Hand out." He held out his hand, palm up. "Okay. Now, instead of picturing the knife in your hand, want it there." He frowned, confused. "Make yourself want the knife bad enough to make it appear." I explained. He stared at it once again. I decided to give him a little verbal incentive. "You can feel it there. You can feel your fingers around it's hilt. You find comfort in its being there." His fingers twitched slightly, as if he wanted to close them around the phantom blade. His eyes darkened, but not in anger. By slipping into a more emotional rather than logical state, he was giving in to his demonic side. The side with access to magic.

I felt a faint flutter in my palm, like the knife flickered in and out of being. He almost had it. Now he just had to release the magic. "Now. Do it."

He snapped his fingers, and his eyes widened as the knife materialised in his hand. I grinned, letting my now empty hand fall.

"I did it!" He beamed, his eyes lighting up. "Look!"

"You did." As if to prove his point, he threw the knife at the target on the wall (hitting a perfect bullseye, of course) then repeated the motion, making it reappear in his hand. "I get it now! I understand..." He looked at me, and I smiled.

"I told you, once you find the magic it's easy to use."

"Jace is gonna be so jealous..." He grinned mischievously. I laughed.

"Now now. That's not a fair fight."

"He wants a fight against a demon? I'll give him a fight against a demon. And a demon wouldn't go easy just because it's not fair."

"Mm. Fair enough, I suppose." I pulled him close and kissed him softly. "So. Shall we move on to something a bit more advanced?"

He kissed me back, and I could feel his joy in his enthusiastic response. When he broke it off, he remained so close to me that our noses almost touched, long eyelashes half covering his eyes, and smiled at me.

"Indeed."


	11. Control

Alec POV

After that, I felt strange. I thought I'd get satisfaction if I proved I could do magic. But instead I felt... wrong. Like the ability was from a whole other being, a roiling mass of disturbed energy hiding just behind my consciousness. And I was the only one who could hold it back.

I'd seen what happened when it broke free.

I hated myself for what I'd done. I felt ashamed. I am... I was a Shadowhunter. Proud. Strong. Shadowhunters do not let themselves succumb to anything which compromises the safety of themselves or others. But I did. I was weak, and in my moment of weakness, that foreign energy took hold. As exciting as being able to conjure objects was, when I stopped and looked back, I realised how strange and wrong it felt. It took hold of cracks in my consciousness made by emotion, seeping in and distorting my thoughts and desires. I had seen the other side of the spectrum. I had seen the mind of a demon. It was made of jealousy and hatred. It wanted to take that which it could not create, and destroy it or use it for its own. It wanted to control and to be supreme. And when it couldn't...

It wanted blood.

And I refused to admit that it should be I. It was part of me. Something so alien to me, someone so reluctant to be powerful or to stand out in any way, was now ingrained into my subconscious psyche. I'd have to learn to deal with it. To keep it controlled. I'd already hurt the love of my life because of it. Just thinking about Magnus's expression made my heart clench. After the anger had subsided, and my rationale returned, I saw what I had done. And I could have dealt with the action, awful as it was. I could have told myself that Magnus knew how to handle the situation, but for the way he looked at me. In fear. I could see it in his eyes, and in the way he held himself. I swore I could smell it, taste it like a bitter tang on my tongue. Pure fear. He was scared... of me. Of what I would do to him. And that's what terrified me. If Magnus, confident, experienced Magnus, was scared of me, then that means he didn't know how to deal with it. And that me hurting him was a very real possibility. He recovered quickly, of course, but even as he held me, even as he praised me for my achievement, I still saw the gleam of apprehension in his eye. Or maybe it was the lingering scent that clung to him. Huh. So I could smell fear now. Add that to my list of freakish qualities.

After we finished our tasks for the day, and before the sun went down and I could go to my training session, we found a moment to ourselves. Magnus collapsed dramatically into the sofa, and I sat beside him, still apprehensive about getting close. He sighed, and grabbed my shirt with one hand, pulling me closer. I didn't complain, just going with it, but not touching him any more than I had to.

"Well. Today was certainly eventful."

"...Yeah..." I picked awkwardly at my fingernails, trying to push away the shame and fear of what I'd done. Magnus just looked down at me and my sorry state with exasperation and a little worry.

"Darling, please don't let it get to you. I know what you're like. You'll let it eat away at you until you've got nothing but bad emotions left. You'll learn to control it. I know you will."

I bit my lip, feeling my pent-up sorrow struggle to burst its banks. "But what if I don't? What if next time I do some serious damage?"

"Well, I know to keep an eye on you now, and I'm perfectly capable of defending myself. If I even need to, which is unlikely. I have faith in you, Alec. I trust that as angry as you may get with me, you'd never really hurt me."

"Not intentionally, no! But... I can't control it. I can feel it, and it wants to hurt you. What if I fail to hold it back?"

"Then I will defend myself, like I said." He turned my head to face him and kissed me lightly. I sighed into his mouth, moving closer, my hand on his chest. His thumb brushed my cheek softly, and I found myself leaning into him, craving the comfort of his arms around me. He smiled down at me, and I could see that he trusted me, and wondered why. After all I've done, how can he trust me like that? With his life?

I'd just have to do my best to keep that trust intact.

Just as I managed to relax, resting my head in Magnus's lap as he lazily flicked through crappy TV channels, the shrill sound of the phone ringing attacked the calm. Magnus groaned, reaching over to pick it up off the coffee table without disturbing me (slightly unsuccessfully), and reluctantly answered it.

"Good evening. I regret to inform you that Bane's magical problem solving services are currently unavailable-" He stopped abruptly, grimacing. "Fine, fine. A few manners wouldn't go amiss, you know." He held it out for me. "It's for you." I took it.

"Hello?"

"Would you please inform your boyfriend of how big of a hypocrite he is?"

I sighed. "Hey Jace. He is right, you know."

"Don't get snarky with me, demon boy." I winced slightly, not that he could tell. "You promised you'd come train tonight. Get your ass down here."

"Jace-"

"I don't care what you're doing, you made a promise."

"...Fine. Give me ten minutes." I wasn't sure whether training was the best idea right now, but I was sure that Jace wouldn't leave me alone all night if I didn't. Magnus pouted. I rolled my eyes at him.

"See you then."

"Yeah." I hung up before he could say anything else.

"Do you have to go?" Magnus's hand, resting on my stomach, began tracing circles over my front. I shivered slightly; it tickled.

"You know he won't give us any peace if I don't." I brushed his teasing hand away, sitting up.

"Whatever. Should I wait up?"

"Probably not. It's already late."

"You'd better make it up to me." He grinned.

I climbed on top of him, pressing my body to his and kissing him, lasting just a little too long for it to be casual before getting off and standing up. "Don't worry. I will."

"You vicious tease." I smirked at him a little, before going to my training room to pick up a few things I thought I might need. I wasn't sure if they would have unmarked weapons on hand at the Institute, and I couldn't use anything marked with angelic runes anymore. Finding a suitably sized bag, I put some knives, a bow, a quiver of arrows and various other melee weapons Magnus had seen fit to provide me with inside. It was a tight fit, as some of them were rather long, but I managed. I then changed into a loose-fitting pair of black combat trousers and a plain black T-shirt which allowed for ease of movement, if not very protective. Returning to the front room, I went to the front door, taking the key from the hook beside the door where he always kept it.

"Alec," I turned to the sound of my voice in time to see Magnus wrap his arms around my waist. "Be careful, okay? Don't let yourself get seen by anyone who might recognise you."

I'd almost forgotten that this was my first time outside since... since I came back. It was still a foreign concept, but I nodded.

"And don't forget to be back before dawn. Daylight isn't safe."

"I know."

"I know you know. Just let me worry, okay? It's my job as your boyfriend."

I smiled reassuringly. "I'll be fine, Magnus. I promise." I gave him a lengthy goodbye kiss before we parted reluctantly and I unlocked the door. "Bye."

"Bye bye, my angel."

I left, closing the door behind me and slipping the key in my pocket.

As I left the building and began to walk down the street, I noticed that people actually looked at me as I passed. It was a strange feeling- the Mundanes usually walk straight past without even knowing I'm there. But today I have no rune to hide myself from sight. I thought about hailing a taxi, but then remembered that I have no money. Instead, I decided to walk, resigning myself to being in close quarters with strangers who could actually see me.

It wasn't a long trip, and before long, I was standing at the gates of the Institute. I almost went up to them, but remembered that it would probably cause unnecessary trouble. Instead, I went around the back until I found the entryway to the Sanctuary. The vestry was empty and cold, but I could hear the clanging of weapons behind the door leading to the main room. Pushing open the heavy door, I followed the noise.

Closing the door behind me, I saw Isabelle and Jace sparring, sparks leaping from their swords as they clashed. Clary was watching, and so was the first to notice my arrival. She shouted for the others' attention, and they turned to face me. Izzy's face split into a grin, and she threw the sword aside to hug attack me. I stumbled back slightly as she hit me, but hugged back.

"We thought you weren't coming!"

"Yeah," Jace pulled Clary to her feet and they both came over. "You said ten minutes. It's been closer to forty, you douche."

"I had to get ready!" I protested.

"Sure. Perhaps next time you should check the diary before climbing into bed with Sparkles."

I flushed again, gaping in protest. "I wasn't...!"

"Sure. I get enough of that from your sister." Now it was Izzy's turn to blush.

"Come on, Jace. You're just jealous because you're too hot to get any action. Literally."

"You still haven't managed to get that under control?" I asked.

"I'm getting better!"

"Sure you are. How many iratzes has he had to draw on you the past week, Clary?" Clary went slightly pink, but set her jaw stubbornly.

"Two."

Jace put his arm around her. "That's my girl."

I didn't miss the way she adjusted slightly so his skin didn't touch hers directly.

After we had steered away from the rather awkward topic of our sex lives, we began to sort through our weapons. It turned out that they had scavenged some weapons that were safe for me to use, but I preferred my own weapons, and I had a greater range anyway.

We first decided to try a basic sparring match, to test my new strength. Jace stood across from me, blunted sword in hand, and I raised my own blade, marvelling at how light it was. When he charged at me, I raised it to block his attack, and stopped him dead. He pushed against me, but I found it surprisingly easy to hold him back. He jumped back and took a swing at my exposed side, and I instinctively swung my sword at his hand. It happened fast, and Jace's blade clattered to the floor, leaving him holding his hand and swearing. I lay the point of the blade on his collarbone.

"I win."

"By the Angel, when did you get so good?"

"Being a demon has its perks." I lowered my sword and half smiled. "I think I'm gonna enjoy this."

Jace glared at me. "Don't get too used to it. Again." He picked up the sword once more, facing me. This time he didn't take a swing directly at me. He feinted left and almost caught a blow to my right, but I just managed to deflect it, the metal edge of the swords scraping against one another. I decided to take offensive, and began striking a series of blows to various weak spots. At first, Jace blocked each one, even almost disarming me at one point, but I began to lay on the speed and strength, and he wore down. After several light blows to his sides, I finished him off with a forward thrust that knocked him to the floor, my weapon pointed at his chest. I heard Isabelle and Clary laughing at Jace's disgruntled expression. Evidently he wasn't happy about being beaten twice in a row. I smiled down at him, reaching out a hand to help him up.

"I let you win, you know."

"Sure you did." He clasped my hand in his to pull himself up. The second his skin touched mine it felt like it was on fire, and I yanked my hand away with a yelp. He fell back down, before getting up himself. "Angel, Jace! I thought you said you'd gotten better with that!"

"I am! Maybe it's a demon thing. You know, Heavenly Fire and all."

"Whatever." I nursed my burnt hand, noticing how it went sort of purplish instead of red. Like a bruise. Must be something to do with the colour of my blood. It was only a minor burn. It'd be healed within a few days. At least, I hoped it would. Who knew how long it would take me to heal from a wound inflicted by Heavenly Fire?

"You alright?" Izzy came up and inspected my hand.

"Yeah. It's nothing."

"Good. If you feel up to it, how about a two-on-one match, if you find it so easy."

"Sure, why not?" I stepped back a little, taking a defensive stance. Izzy found a sword for herself and joined Jace, facing me, blade raised. I waited for them to make the first move. Jace was the first to move, coming straight at me, only to dodge to one side as I moved to deflect his hit. Izzy was almost immediately at my other side, and I was deflecting blows on all sides, moving as swiftly as I could. I was surprised that I hadn't been hit yet. They worked together perfectly, coupling their attacks to push me as hard as they could. With only one sword, I could barely keep them off me. Knowing this would quickly wear me down, I changed tactics, relying on instinct as I ducked, rolled and firmly planted my foot on Jace's back, shoving him forwards to crash into Izzy, taking them both down. Still, their reactions were fast, and they recovered quickly. Izzy swept my feet out from under me with her leg, and they were on me before I hit the ground. Jace's sword point rested in the hollow of my throat. He was smirking.

"That's better."

I scowled, feeling frustrated. I wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off his face...

"Don't look so sour, big brother. Demons aren't invincible. We hunt them for a living, remember?" Izzy helped me up. "You might be better than you were, but you're not perfect."

"I know. But still." I replaced the blade, getting out my bow and quiver. "Besides, a sword isn't my weapon of choice."

It didn't take long for me to reacquaint myself with the bow, despite it not being my old one. I asked what they'd done with it. Jace said he kept it in his room, even used it sometimes, even though he wasn't as good with it as me. I was glad it was in good hands, but I missed its familiar feel. I'd just have to get used to a different one. It felt good, being able to shoot again. I'd have picked it up sooner, but my training room at Magnus's wasn't really big enough for me to practice with my bow. Before long I was hitting every target dead centre, encompassed in the zen that came with using my favourite weapon. I quickly ran out of arrows, so ended up summoning them back to my hand rather than stopping to go collect them. As focused as I was on the bow, it took me a while to realise that all the sounds of the others training had stopped. I paused midway through drawing my bow, the string taut by my ear, and glanced to my side, frowning. The three of them were staring at me, looks of confusion on their faces, even a little fear.

"What?" I relaxed, lowering the bow.

"You can do magic?" Jace exclaimed as Izzy said, "Alec, your eyes..." I blinked.

"Your eyes are black." Clary stepped forwards. "Have they done that before?"

I thought back. Magnus had never told me they had, but he'd had a similar look on his face when I'd had my outbursts earlier. "I... Don't know. I think it happens when the demon part... Shows up." I felt the demonic energy tingle in my fingertips, and loosened my control over it a little. Flames, much like Magnus's, only much darker and purplish, danced over my skin. I felt a small smile touch my lips as it seemed to play happily, as if glad to be free. "Magnus taught me how to access it. I'm not great at it yet. All I can do are summoning spells, and when I get mad I lose control over it." I grimaced, remembering the knife incident earlier today. "But now that I know how to get to it, it's relatively easy to use and control, if I focus hard enough." I looked up. Clary was watching the indigo fire on my fingertips, looking apprehensive.

"Are you sure you can control it?"

"If I keep my mood in control, yeah. So don't make me angry." I smirked at Jace. He just glared.

"You can do magic now, too? That's not fair."

"Yeah, well, now you know how I felt growing up with you." He looked stricken, and I could have sworn he blushed a little. Rolling my eyes, I dispelled the flames, turning my attention back to the target.

"Alec..." I stopped again. Izzy was walking up to me. "Um... I don't know if you were planning on telling them or anything... But mom and dad have been tearing themselves up over this. They blame themselves for what happened. And I want to tell them, but I know I don't really have the right to do that." I bit my lip.

"I don't know... Something tells me they'd rather have a dead son than a demon son."

Isabelle looked like she was about to cry. "Don't say that. You know they love you. It's a parent's job."

"That's what I thought before I told them I'm gay. Then they just seemed to ignore me. Now this? I don't think it would help at all." I sighed, avoiding her gaze. "Besides, I'd just get Dad in even more trouble. And Magnus. They wouldn't let Magnus get away with breaking Covenant law, not even for me."

"...You know you can't hide forever. They'll find out."

"I need time to figure things out. When I can think of a way to tell them with as few consequences as possible, then I'll talk. Until then... Please keep my secret. And make the other two promise as well. I trust you." She nodded.

"Okay."

I shifted awkwardly, suddenly wanting to go. "It's late. I should go back to Magnus's."

"Already?"

"Sorry. I'll come back tomorrow if you want."

"Yeah. We'll make it a regular thing." I smiled, then said goodbye to Clary and Jace. We agreed to meet same place same time tomorrow, then I left.

Back home, I put my weapons back in my training room, then crept to the master bedroom, being as quiet as possible as I opened the door, stripped off and climbed into bed beside Magnus. Still, he rolled over to face me as I settled down.

"Back so early?" His face was sleepy, but he seemed to have still been awake when I came in, rather than having been woken up.

"Yeah. I'm going again tomorrow though."

"Damn." He snuggled up to me, nuzzling my hair. I could smell him, his spicy, burnt-sugar scent. I kissed him gently, settling into his embrace.

"Night."

"Goodnight, Alexander."

Over the following weeks, I trained in both magic and physical ability. I came to terms with my new strength, as well as learning new spells and abilities from Magnus. So far the only thing I hadn't been able to master was healing spells. Magnus suggested this might be because demon magic isn't meant to heal, especially not to heal humans or Shadowhunters. I was getting better at controlling my emotions, and was proud to say I hadn't attacked Magnus since the knife incident. The issue of telling my parents weighed heavily on my mind, but I hadn't had to come to terns with it just yet.

Life seemed to be going pretty well, as well as it could be expected to go, without any major hitches. Until the day I turned up at the Sanctuary to find it was empty. I assumed the others were busy and would be down soon, so I waited. It wasn't long before I heard the door open, and voices coming through it.

"Mom! There's nothing down here!" I sat up straight, panic washing through me.

"If there's nothing down here, you won't mind me taking a look," The unmistakeable voice echoed through the large room. I scrambled to my feet, looking around for somewhere to hide, but the big, empty room offered no such place. Instead I headed for the door to the outside, my heart hammering in my chest. "I just want to know why you three have been coming down here every nigh- HEY!" I froze, my hand on the rusted handle of the door, trembling. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. "SHOW YOURSELF!"

Well, there was no getting out of it now. Opening my eyes once more, I turned. My mother, usually so strong, so poised and fierce, went white as a sheet, eyes wide and full of fear.

"A... Alec...?" Her voice trembled. I smiled sadly.

"Hi mom."


	12. Truth

Isabelle POV

I lay sprawled over my bed, running my fingertips over the runes carved into the elegant bow in my hands. Alec's bow. Except... He couldn't use it anymore. I'd taken it from Jace's room. I wasn't sure why, but I wanted it. Just to hold it in my hands. The wood was smooth, well worn. Well loved. It seemed sad that my brother's most reliable, most favourite weapon would never be used by him again. Still... It could be worse. I remembered the pain I'd felt when I realised he was dead. Holding his body in my arms, the second brother I'd lost. He was so cold. Like he'd been dead for days, not minutes. I couldn't believe it when I came face to face with him at Magnus's apartment. I still found it hard to get my head around.

I twanged the string, glancing up at the clock. Ten to nine. Almost time to meet him down in the Sanctuary. I decided to go down early. I'd take his bow, maybe try my hand at a few shots. I thought he'd like to see it being used.

I got up and made my way through the Institute. I heard talking from Jace's bedroom. I still found it astounding that Clary managed to evade Jocelyn almost every evening. I didn't know how she did it- that woman was intimidating. Still, I supposed she was busy with wedding preparations, and Luke probably helped keep her pacified. Walking on past, I headed down to the corridor leading to the Sanctuary.

"Isabelle," I stopped, looking over my shoulder. "Where are you going?" My mother was standing behind me, looking stern.

"Training."

"In the Sanctuary, not the training hall?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah. I wanted peace from Jace and Clary and their sickening adoration." I lied smoothly, adding in a grimace for good measure.

"But they're not training right now. And if I'm not mistaken, they've been coming down here with you every night for a while. What's going on?"

I swallowed. She wasn't going to leave this alone. "It's a larger space. Soundproofed, too. We can do different types of training to the stuff we do in the Institute."

"Yeah? What sort of training?"

"Uh..." I looked down at the bow in my hand. "Long range shooting. I realised that I'm not very good with that, and we don't... We don't have a long range fighter anymore." I stroked the weapon, looking sombre. I hated using Alec's death to get her off my tail, but I had a promise to keep. She sighed.

"Can I watch?"

I blinked. "Sorry?"

"Can I watch you shoot? Surely you wouldn't mind me watching."

Damn. She really wouldn't let this go. "Um... I'd rather not."

"Why? You're not the sort to get embarrassed. Unless you're hiding something from me." She narrowed her eyes. "You're not messing about with that Downworlder boyfriend of yours, are you?"

I felt myself flush, shocked. "No! Simon... He's not like that. He's... Decent." More decent than the majority of my dating history, anyway.

"What are you hiding from me, Isabelle?" She stepped towards me. "If you don't tell me, I'm going to find out." When I failed to answer, she strode past me, to the door. As she opened it, I could only hope Alec wasn't there, that he was late or decided not to come.

"Mom! There's nothing down here!"

"If there's nothing down here, then you won't mind me taking a look." The room beyond was dark, but it didn't take a night vision enhancing rune to see the figure heading towards the door which lead outside. Shit. There was nothing I could do except hope she took the news well. "I just want to know why you three have been coming down here every nigh-" she stopped short as she spotted him. "HEY!" I cringed at the tone of her voice. The figure that was unmistakeably Alec froze. "SHOW YOURSELF!" Slowly, he turned to face us. His familiar blue eyes looked afraid, but resigned. Beside me, my mother paled, and for a second I thought she was going to pass out. "A... Alec...?" She stammered. He smiled softly.

"Hi mom."

I saw conflicting emotions flash over her face. Confusion, sadness, anger, relief, fear. She seemed to be lost for words.

"Oh... Oh Angel..." Before he could react, she had run towards him and embraced him, holding him tightly. He looked shocked, but returned the hug. "Oh Alec... It can't be... Is it really you? My son..." I could hear the tears in her voice. When she finally pulled away, she rested a hand on his cheek, stroking his face gently with her thumb. "You look exactly the same..." Her voice faltered. "Am I dreaming again?"

Alec blinked. "No, mom... You dream about me?"

She nodded. "Every night."

"Oh..." He stepped back, looking ashamed. "...Sorry." Now it was my mother's turn to blink, incredulous.

"For what? Dying? Alec, that wasn't something you could control. You can't blame yourself."

"I was reckless. And now everything's... Messed up."

"What do you mean?"

"I..." He faltered off, looking awkward.

"You know what? There's clearly a lot to talk about. Why don't we go into the Institute and find somewhere more comfortable to talk?"

I saw Alec flinch, and spoke up. "Mom, I don't think that's a good idea." She frowned at me.

"Why not?"

"Well... What would Dad say if he wandered into the living room and saw you casually chatting to your dead son? There's got to be a better way to tell him."

"Izzy..." Alec's voice was quiet. "I appreciate the effort, but... I might as well tell her."

"Tell me what?" Mom narrowed her eyes.

"I can't go in the Institute..." He ran his fingers through his dark hair, looking distinctly uncomfortable.

"...Are you a vampire?" She was instantly checking for signs of vampirism on him. "I don't know how that would have worked, but-"

"No, I'm not a vampire."

"But... Only vampires and demons can't get in the Institute..."

"Yeah."

There was a brief silence as she seemed to put two and two together somewhat reluctantly. "You're not... It's not possible, is it?" She took a step away from him. He gave her a sad look.

"Neither is coming back from the dead. But here I am." Seeing the barely disguised repulsion on my mother's face, and the hurt look in Alec's eyes, I went to his side, taking his hand.

"Mom, he's still the same! He can do some cool new things, but that's all that changed. He's not like other demons. He's good. He's on our side." He gave me a grateful smile. I returned it.

"Isabelle, come here. How do we know he's safe? How do we know it's really him?!"

I felt cold rage in my chest. "No. I'm staying by my brother's side. You want to know why we've been coming here? It's so we can see him. And that's been going on for a while now. If anything bad was gonna happen, it would have already. I trust him, even if he is a demon. And don't you dare do this to him again. He's taken enough shit from you in his life!"

"Isabelle!" She looked shocked. "I am your mother! You can't talk to me like that!"

"I can talk to you however I damn well please. Do you know how much he's been hurting?"

"Izzy..." Alec looked at me worriedly. "Don't." I ignored him, too angry to let it go.

"He thought you and Dad didn't love him any more, because of his sexuality. He's been really broken up about it. And the reason he didn't want to see you sooner was because he didn't want to see your reaction, the looks on your faces. The look you're wearing right now." My voice was coldly furious, and had the desired effect. Her expression of barely contained disgust turned to sadness, then shame. Beside me, Alec shifted uncomfortably. I knew he was torn between comforting her and standing by what I'd said. Standing by the truth.

"Alec... Is that true?" For once, her voice was quiet. Not dangerously quiet. Hurt.

"I... Appreciate that you tried. Having a disappointment of a son can't be easy. At least you put up with me. Father's probably happy I'm dead." Even I flinched at that.

"Your father still loves you, even if he... Doesn't agree with your life decisions."

"See, it's things like that. It's not a decision. I didn't choose this, and honestly I wouldn't if I could, because it just causes so much trouble. It's who I am. And every time someone denies that it hurts. I once told Izzy that it was like a million little paper cuts every day. Every time someone ignores what I have to say, turns their back on me or comments about how I can't continue the Lightwood line, or that I should consider rethinking my choices, it's another blow to my self esteem. And I never had that much to start with, especially living in Jace's shadow. Even the little things get to me pretty badly. So yeah, I guess it is a little true. Sometimes I feel like you only love me because you're obliged to." I couldn't remember the last time he'd said so much at one time. It was like once he'd started he just couldn't stop. And whilst I was proud that he'd mustered up the courage to say it, I couldn't deny that it was almost cruel. In true Alec fashion, he hadn't even tried to soften the blow, his words blunt and his tone matter-of-fact. And I could tell how much it had hurt Mom.

"I'm... So sorry..."

"Sorry's just a word. If you meant it you'd act differently from now on."

"I... Suppose you're right. I mean, you didn't choose this- any of it. But I don't understand. People don't just come back from the dead. And I know you were dead. Honestly, I'm still not sure if I can believe it's really you." She frowned. "How long did you say you've been back?"

"I... Uh... I didn't. It's been..." He looked at me, questioning. I shrugged. "Just under two months?" I saw Mom mouth the words incredulously.

"And... How did it happen?"

"I don't know exactly... It was Magnus. He-"

"Magnus Bane?! Alexander, I thought you'd learnt your lesson about that man!" Alec winced. "He's a warlock. He can't be trusted. He probably made some heinous deal with a demon that both of you will later regret!"

"It was his father."

She stopped. "What?"

"The demon. It was Magnus's father."

"What does that matter?"

"That's the only reason it worked. His father seemed to find it amusing or something. That's why I'm a demon. Just to make his life difficult. Twisted gifts and all that."

"So... There was no price to pay?"

Alec frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Every deal made with a demon calls for a price to be paid."

"Magnus didn't mention any price..." A flicker of confusion, then anger crossed his face. I knew he'd had issues with Magnus keeping things from him in the past. In fact, I was fairly sure that was what had split them up eventually, although he hadn't spoken about it much. "Well, I trust him. I owe him my life, quite literally, so I have to believe that if he'd done something that bad he'd tell me."

"Can you really trust him though? He's a Downworlder. And he broke your heart. Are you really willing to go back to him after that?"

"Yes." The conviction in his voice made me smile despite myself. Mom sighed.

"Alright. It's your decision. But there's still the matter of the fact that necromancy is dark magic. It's illegal." Both Alec and I gasped.

"Mom... You wouldn't." She looked at me sadly.

"You know the rules, Isabelle. Sed lex dura lex. If the Clave were to find out-"

"Screw the Clave!" I stared at Alec, his outburst shocking me. He'd always been so conservative, so... Law-abiding. Then again, it was his lover's head on the line. And technically Shadowhunter law didn't apply to him any more. "You can't tell them. You know what happens to Downworlders who break the law!"

"Alec... If I keep this from them, when they find out they'll take the Institute away from us. They may strip our marks. And I know that doesn't concern you any more-"

"MOM." I yelled, stunned. How could she say that?! "Of course it concerns him! Do you think he doesn't care?!"

"Mom, I know. But that's not a certainty. They don't have to know you know. Please. Don't tell them. Don't get Magnus killed."

"Alec, I can't do that. I'm sorry..."

"HE GAVE YOU YOUR SON BACK. HE BROUGHT ALEC BACK TO LIFE AND YOU ARE WILLING TO LET THE CLAVE MURDER HIM FOR FEAR OF YOUR OWN HEAD?!" I was fuming, having dropped Alec's hand and advanced on her.

"Isabelle, please..." She pleaded.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" I screamed.

"ISABELLE LIGHTWOOD." Her tone was harsh enough that I shut up. "I can't promise I won't. But unless they come asking I'll keep his secret. But only for Alec." Her eyes rested on him. "I'm sorry, but I abide by the law. Laws can be bent, but not broken. Not by me. I hope it doesn't come to that." She turned away. "Go back to him. Don't come here. You put risk on us and yourself. If you want to see each other do it somewhere other than here." With that she left. Just left. Leaving Alec and I alone to think about what she'd said.

"...This is what I was afraid of." He half mumbled.

"Alec, we don't know what will happen. You might stay safe. She might not say a word."

"But what if she does?" His eyes met mine, and they were filled with a sort of cold fear. "I remember what the previous Inquisitor did to Simon. And that was just to get information. Who knows what Father will do to Magnus because of this? He never did like him. What if they torture him? Kill him?"

"Calm down. Magnus can defend himself, and he's got you by his side. You won't let them hurt him and you know it."

"If it comes to a fight... I don't know if I can. They're Shadowhunters. They used to be my family."

"Trust me, Alec. When someone you love is in danger, it doesn't matter who you're fighting. Just that you're protecting that person. Magnus is your true love, and that bond is clearly stronger than any you might have had to people you barely know in a previous life." He paused, then nodded.

"You're right. Protecting is what I do. I can protect him."

I smiled. "Good. Now go back to him. Have an evening in. I'm sure he'll appreciate it."

"Yeah... Thanks Izzy." He pulled me into a hug, which I returned. "Tell Jace I'm sorry. Not that he'll mind. He gets extra alone time with Clary." His sombre expression broke for a second to allow a small smile. "See you."

"Bye." I watched as he left, then went back into the Institute. Jace was alone in the main hall. "Clary had to leave?" I enquired.

"We heard shouting. She decided to leave before things got messy. What happened?" I debriefed him on our conversation with Mom, to which he replied, "Well, at least she knows. And hey, our track record with the Clave is a little tarnished already. We can cope."

"I hope Alec believes that. We can't let him worry about this. You know what he's like." He nodded.

"No training tonight then?"

"Nope. You've got the evening off."

"Damn. I shouldn't have let Clary leave."

I smirked. "I knew you'd say that."

"Oh well. I need to spend time with my other true love once in a while- the mirror has been sadly neglected recently." I just rolled my eyes at him.

"Goodnight, Jace." I returned to my room. As much as I knew Alec would worry, I couldn't deny there was a tightness in my stomach that I knew meant something bad would happen. I could only hope it wouldn't result in any more death. I don't think any of us could take that.


	13. Rejection

Alec POV

The journey home gave me time to think, which probably wasn't the best thing to be doing, what with everything that was going through my mind right now. I'd effectively been kicked out of my childhood home (although to be fair I couldn't go in anyway, but it still hurt) by none other than my own mother, who'd also threatened to make my boyfriend an outlaw, most likely endangering his life. At least that's how I saw it, anyway. Maybe it wasn't an outright threat, but it felt like one. I felt like crying, but instead I put on a stony mask, trying to be strong. I wanted Magnus so badly right then, so when I finally arrived back at his apartment, I was ready to throw myself into his arms the second I saw him.

I stopped just outside the door, pausing, key in hand as I heard faint strains of music from the other side. Twisting the key in the lock, I pushed open the door as quietly as I could. Inside, I saw the sofa had been pushed aside to make room for a full-sized ivory piano. Magnus was sat with his back to me, his lithe body reacting to the music as his fingers danced across the keys. He'd never mentioned that he could play, which was surprising, since he's usually very vocal about things he's good at. And he was clearly good at this. The song was a beautiful piece, slow and lyrical, comforting to listen to. If I shut my eyes, it made me think of home, and safety. I always found it astounding how music can affect your mood, or create images in your mind. I loved piano music, I had ever since I'd first heard Jace play. At first it was just another thing to be jealous of, but I found myself standing on the other side of doors, hearing him play all manner of pieces. I never told him, of course, and I don't think he ever knew. And now I could listen to Magnus play, too.

I just stood there, smiling and listening as he played, pushing the door shut behind me. He must have heard it click shut, as he glanced quickly over his shoulder at me. Instead of stopping playing though, I heard the song begin to change, becoming more complex, building and layering. I knew he was showing off for me now, notes coming fast and almost jumbled, but somehow still making sense. As the piece reached a crescendo, the song was no longer soft and gentle, but strong and confident. I drifted to his side, trying not to disturb him. The song seemed to dance, the tune moving up and down in a strong rhythm. This was a hero's song, proud and joyful. Again, I thought of Jace, but the image was dispelled as Magnus looked up at me, still playing. Okay, now that was definitely showing off. His thin fingers slid over the keys, the melody moving up an octave as I stood over him. I wondered how long he'd been learning. This piece was fairly complex, so he certainly wasn't a novice. The melody flowed onto the black keys, creating a tension in the song, but not a negative tension. No, it was more anticipation than anything. Either way, I felt each note run through me like an electric current. It dipped down to deeper notes, seeming almost darker before relapsing into the main tune once more. He seemed to be enjoying himself, putting his all into his playing. I smiled. Few things drew this reaction out of him; fashion, magic and music being among them.

As it calmed down again, Magnus spoke.

"Hello my love. Please, join me."

"Won't I put you off?"

"Not at all, if anything you're my inspiration. I only ever feel the need to play if I've got a strong emotion I can channel into the music. And Alec, darling, you give me enough of that to keep playing forever." I blushed, and perched on the edge of his seat. His right hand tapped out a simple tune, his left doing most of the work.

"How long have you been able to play?" I asked, mesmerised by the movement of his hands.

"I… can't actually remember. I think I first began tapping away to myself at around 1760, but it took me a long time to actually teach myself any half decent pieces." He closed his eyes, and I knew he was feeling the music just as much as he was listening to it.

"So… you taught yourself?"

"Yeah." He grinned. "I know right. How amazing am I?"

I couldn't help it. I had to poke back. "Took you two and a half centuries to do it."

"Shut up and appreciate my talents."

I laughed. "So what is this piece?"

He looked shocked. "You don't recognise it? Why, Alexander, this is one of the best gaming soundtracks ever created!"

I frowned. "Gaming? As in… video games? This is from a video game?"

"Not just any video game. This beautiful piece comes from that masterpiece of gaming known as The Legend of Zelda." The music got louder again as he sang its praises. He grinned at me. "I'll get you to play it sometime. You'll like it. Lots of fighting."

"If you say so…" I muttered, curious as to how a video game could be that good. Then again, Shadowhunters don't play video games, so I had no idea what they were like.

"Ah, this is my favourite part," Magnus said as the music softened, before thundering into a new tune, loud and powerful. I watched him, enraptured as he lost himself to the song, note perfect- at least I assumed so. I wasn't the best judge, seeing as I had never heard the piece before. The song was almost violent in its urgency, fast paced and strident. I looked at the sheet music propped up on its stand. I wasn't very good at reading music, but I tried to follow along, finding the place where the notes seemed to fit the pattern of the song. How anyone could read it fast enough to play it in the proper timing was beyond me, and I figured that there must have been some amount of memorising the tune and where the keys were involved. I wondered if Magnus could teach me how to play. We certainly had time, and I'd love to be able to do what he was doing right now- creating music.

It changed yet again, but this time it did not change in dynamics. No, it was still loud, the tone being the thing that warped and morphed. It was loud and triumphant, reminding me of the second part, but slightly different. I wondered at how music so emotive and detailed could come from a game, of all things. I would expect this from a symphony, or a movie at the very least. At any rate, it was beautiful.

"Magnus?"

"Yes my angel?"

"...Could you teach me how to play?" He smiled.

"Not right this second, but sure. I'd love to hear you play."

The music softened, and I felt my cheeks darken. "I probably won't be any good..."

"You say you've never played before?"

"No, never."

"Then I can't exactly expect you to be Beethoven now, can I?" He grinned. "It takes time. And practice." His fingers danced up the keys, right up to the top notes in a sort of break, then went back to the chorus.

"Show off." I stuck my tongue out at him. He laughed.

When the piece had finally drawn to its end after a beautifully composed collaboration of each individual tune, during which I had done nothing but listen, resting my head on Magnus' shoulder, he closed his eyes, a soft smile on his face. I looked up at him, and seeing him with his eyes shut, I pressed my lips to his gently. I heard a small breath escape him, then he kissed me back softly, and I could almost feel the emotion flowing through him. When I pulled away, he looked at me, gold-green eyes practically glowing, reflecting the gentle lighting of the room. I smiled back, feeling perfectly content until he spoke.

"How was your day?"

Instantly the memories of what had happened flooded back, and I frowned. His expression changed to one of worry.

"Alec, love, what happened?"

"Um... When I got there, my... My mother was there. She saw me. I had to tell her, Magnus. I had to!" Confusion, then anger, then fear flickered across his features almost to quickly to track, before he regained control, taking in a breath.

"...And?"

"She said she wouldn't tell the Clave..." He visibly relaxed. I winced. "...But if Father asks questions she will tell him the truth. He's the Inquisitor now..." Magnus' breath hitched. I bit my lip, looking down.

"Well... It's okay, I mean what cause would Robert have to ask about his dead son?"

I nodded, still looking down. "...And I can't go to the Institute to train anymore. She told me to never come back." My eyes stung, but I didn't let the tears fall.

"Oh, love..." He pulled me into a hug. I rested my head on his chest, listening to his heart in an effort to forget the pain of what had happened. "I'm sure that she's just scared. Finding out her dead son isn't actually dead must be hard hitting enough, let alone finding out he's a demon. I'm sure she's just scared." I nodded, wanting to believe him, but I'd been in this position one too many times. My parents were proud people; they weren't going to let anything disgrace them further. Even if they did believe it was me. Maybe my mother would be willing to let me continue life without involving herself too much, but I couldn't say the same for my father. In his mind, his duty to the Clave came before his family. He'd made that clear when he left. He wouldn't let Magnus get away with breaking the law. He'd never liked him. As for me... I didn't know. At any rate, it would be better if he didn't find out.

A few conversations and mugs of coffee later, after getting far away from that topic, Magnus and I were once again snuggled on the sofa in our usual position- Magnus lounging over the arm and me curled next to him, my head on his chest and his arm around me. I could just about hear his heartbeat, and I found it comforting as I closed my eyes, tuning out whatever late-night crap Magnus had on TV. I felt him kiss my hair softly, and I looked up at him a little blearily.

"You tired, love?"

"A little." I looked over at the clock, and realised it was well into the early hours of the morning. We'd spent hours just chatting and cuddling, doing nothing in particular but being together. It astounded me how that happened without either of us noticing.

He followed my gaze and smiled softly. "Wow. Looks like bedtime to me."

"Yeah..." I pulled myself up, and he followed me to the bedroom. As we got ready for bed, I found myself staring at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I looked pretty normal; blue eyes, pale skin, shaggy black hair that Magnus was always telling me to cut. But as I unbuttoned my shirt and my gaze travelled down over my throat, shoulders and chest, I was still struck by the blankness of my skin. Not a single mark marred it, whether it was the shiny pink of a battle scar, the silvery lines of healed runes or the bold blackness of the runes themselves. Every one of them had been erased- and I had had a lot of them.

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that when Magnus's arms wrapped around my waist, and I felt his lips on the side of my neck, it almost made me jump.

"Did I startle you?" His voice was right in my ear now, soft and a little husky, and I watched his reflection in the mirror, marvelling at how different his skin was to mine, the colour that reminded me of caramel, stark in comparison to my near-white.

"A bit." I admitted, leaning my head back into his shoulder. He was warm, and I loved it when he hugged me from behind like this. He nipped at my throat playfully, and I protested quietly. "Magnus..."

He chuckled. "I'm sorry love. You're just so tasty." I hit his arm lightly, and he let go, stepping back. "What? It's true!" I ignored his smirk, rolling my eyes.

"Whatever." I turned to him and kissed him lightly. He responded with a much deeper kiss, tasting of toothpaste. I felt his hand on the back of my neck, and his body against mine. Sometimes I wondered why he wanted me, but I definitely knew why I wanted him, and it was moments like this that reminded me most.

After finally leaving the bathroom one long and passionate kiss later, he began to undress, and I decided to help him, getting his shirt off and running my hand over his flat, bare navel. He shivered a little, putting his hand over mine, stopping its movement.

"Don't do that. It tickles." His expression was lighthearted, but I'd gone down that path enough times that I knew it usually ended up with me pinned down and unable to move, usually with a few new bruises. I laughed a little.

"Sorry." Instead, I kissed him again, just a gentle brush of my lips on his, but it spoke of how I wanted him. My hands went to his belt, getting it off in a quick and well practiced manner.

"Oh Alexander. What you do to me..." Then his lips were on mine, and I was reminded of the kiss that ended our first, wonderfully disastrous date. I was vaguely aware he'd pushed me back onto the bed and was now on top of me, but all that mattered was his tongue in my mouth and his hands on my body, leaving tingling trails in their wake. My own hands pushed insistently at his jeans, and when they became too much of a bother he magicked them away, along with the rest of my clothes. I gasped at the sudden sensation of skin on skin, at the warmth his naked form provided. My fingers tangled in his hair as we kissed passionately, our bodies pressed together.

"Magnus..." I moaned as he kissed and licked a trail down my throat and chest. Before he could go any further though, I pushed on his shoulder, knocking him onto his back beside me. I climbed on top of him and kissed his collarbone, nipping first and then biting properly, relishing his gasp as I leave my mark on him.

"Taking charge tonight, are you?"

I made an assenting noise, giving him another hickey on the side of his throat.

My hands ran down his chest, making him shiver. When my thumbs brushed over his nipples, he bit his lip. I grinned, and put my lips to the spot, teasing him with my tongue. He made a soft, contented noise deep in his chest, almost like a purr. I could feel him hard against my stomach, and I reached a hand down between us to stroke him. Moaning, he ground against me, looking for more friction. I began to kiss a trail further down, past his heart, past his scar, past where his navel would be, if he had one. He had short, well-kept black hair under there. He liked it kept neat.

I replaced my hand with my tongue, and felt his fingers tangle in my hair as I licked him from base to tip.

"Alec..." He breathed. I fought a shiver at the way he said my name, placing my lips on the head, kissing gently before going down on him properly. His moan spurred me on, and I took maybe three or four inches into my mouth before I felt him hit the back of my throat. I swallowed around him, suppressing my gag reflex, and began to move my head back and forth, going a little further each time until I had the whole thing in my mouth, and his hair tickled my nose. Looking up, I met his gaze, his eyes a brazen gold and practically glowing with lust. I swallowed again, and felt his length deep in my throat. I moved, letting him thrust into my mouth as I worked the underside with my tongue. His gasps got more frequent, before turning into moans and short, sharp cries when I gently scraped his length with my teeth, just barely, but enough to make his whole body jerk in a spasm of pleasure.

"Oh... Oh god Alec..." I felt him tense, and I wondered briefly if I should let him finish. He could go again. I knew he could. So I kept going until he screamed my name, pulling my hair and coming hard. I had pulled away just enough that I could taste him on my tongue as I swallowed. His was sweeter than mine somehow, and once I had gotten used to the taste I had come to quite like it.

I continued a little longer, drawing out his orgasm until he was panting hard and tugging gently on my hair, wordlessly asking me to come back up. I did so, still with his come on my tongue. He kissed me passionately, and I knew he could taste himself.

As he recovered, I decided to prepare myself a little, though I wanted to still be tight for him. I sat astride him and stuck two fingers in my mouth, getting them wet. He watched me, eyes still burning. Never once breaking eye contact, I pushed one finger inside myself, biting my lip. His fingertips ran over my thighs, sending shivers through me. Adding my second finger, I began to move, fingering myself, trying to find that spot that would drive me crazy. I could feel that Magnus was already getting hard again- he'd always been quick to recover. I leaned down to kiss him. He responded enthusiastically, and when I broke away he muttered in my ear.

"Ride me, Alexander." His voice was breathy and lustful. I nodded, removing my fingers and stroking him into full hardness. Then I lined him up and slowly, torturingly slowly lowered myself down. He moaned again, and I closed my eyes for a moment, focusing purely on the feeling of him inside me. Leaning back slightly, I found the perfect angle. If I shifted just the slightest bit, it sent my mind reeling. I was very aware that my whole body was on display for him, and his eyes were raking me hungrily. His pupils were little more than lines, looking predatory. His hands were on my waist, nails digging into my skin, the slight pain only turning me on even more.

I lifted myself up until he was nearly out of me. Then I let myself fall. Pleasure ran through my whole body; I could feel it singing through my nerves. I threw my head back, eyes wide and breath hitching in my chest. Magnus growled, and I felt him push upwards, trying to get deeper. His hip bones pressed into the underside of my thighs, wonderfully warm against me. His hand reached to touch me, but I stopped him.

"I want... I want to come just from having you inside me..." My voice came out unsteady, breathy. I could barely think through the haze of lust in my mind. Moving once more, I felt that pleasure explode through me once more. We moved in tandem, him thrusting up into me as I rode him, feeling him brushing my prostate every time. I was in heaven.

It didn't take long for me to be flushed and panting, moaning his name. I had laced the fingers of one hand with his, and I felt his grip tighten. I was in a world of my own, just the two of us and pleasure. And it was intense. Below me, he seemed to be in a similar state, his free hand grasping at the bed frame above his head. Before long, it became difficult to hold rhythm, and I leaned forward to kiss him passionately as I felt my insides tense. It was a build up of intensity that only came with an orgasm caused by him fucking me, not touching my dick at all. I felt myself teetering on the edge, and I ground against him hard, causing him to rub up against that spot continually, making the pleasure just keep going instead of coming in short bursts like it had before. With stimulation this intense, it didn't take me long to come.

I screamed.

My whole body felt like a live wire, my head spinning and my toes curling. I was vaguely aware that he came too- I heard him moan my name and felt the warmth of his come deep inside me. When I was finally spent from possibly the best orgasm I'd ever had, I all but collapsed on top of him. I felt my body trembling from the exertion and the sudden relaxation of every muscle I had.

For a while we just lay there, breathless and sticky, neither of us needing to say a word. Eventually Magnus waved a hand and cleaned up the mess, and I got off him. I shivered in a sort of aftershock as I felt him slide out of me, and my body practically gave out on me as I lay down.

My head rested on his shoulder, our legs tangled together. His skin was hot against mine, and his familiar burnt-sugar scent was struck through with the tangy odour of sweat and sex. His arm around my shoulder felt like home. In that perfect moment, I felt peaceful. Wholly relaxed and safe, in the arms of the man I love. I felt like nothing could possibly go wrong, despite all that had happened.

How wrong I was.


	14. Trial

Magnus POV

It was a Tuesday morning when all hell broke loose. I'd always hated Tuesdays.

I suppose I should thank Isabelle. After all, she didn't save the day, but she gave us some time to prepare.

The phone rang, and I picked up as usual, sparks dancing around my fingers lazily as I flopped into a chair.

"You have reached the fabulous Bane, how can I help you?"

"Magnus, you have to go."

I frowned. "Isabelle dearest, I don't know what-"

"Now, Magnus! They're coming for you! They'll kill you! And Alec!"

I felt my heart stutter, a flicker of fear settling in my stomach.

"Isabelle... Who's coming?" I dreaded the answer. It came anyway.

"The Shadowhunters. Led by our father."

There was a brief moment of silence.

"Right. Well. I suppose I should be going then."

"Good luck." She said abruptly, then hung up. I stared at my phone for a few seconds, then the full weight of the situation hit me.

"ALEC!" I yelled, fighting down panic. I'd never really been on the receiving end of a Shadowhunter's full wrath. Petty arguments, yes, social issues, most definitely, but never looking-down-a-seraph-blade-fearing-for-your-life situations. My favourite ex-Shadowhunter ran out of our bedroom, hair wet and plastered to his forehead, wearing only a pair of sweats and looking wide-eyed and fearful.

"Magnus?! What's wrong? Why'd you call me?"

"We have to go. Now. Pack only your essentials." I watched confusion hit him like a brick to the face. "That thing we were dreading? It's happening." Confusion turned to fear, then to determination. He nodded once, then ran to the weapons room. I set about finding the few things I knew I couldn't summon or replace and packing them into a nondescript rucksack. The White book, my athame, my copy of the grey book and a few other incredibly important magical artifacts went in there. Food, drinks and clothes could all be summoned en route. En route to where, I didn't know yet. Probably somewhere in Europe. Not Paris, the local vampires still held a grudge against me, but somewhere similar. Italy, perhaps. Milan. Somewhere like that.

Five minutes later we were ready to leave. I was about to throw open the door when Alec stopped me.

"Magnus... Sunlight." I frowned, then remembered.

"Oh, right." I bit my lip, thinking, then pulled out the White book and began flicking through it. I'm sure there was something... Aha!

I muttered a few words, and a shadowy haze settled over Alec before dispersing. I felt the immediate drain on my magic- it was a stronger spell than I expected. I wondered how long I could hold it for.

"That should help. Let's go." I put the book back and opened the door. Sunlight streamed in, but Alec didn't jump back or scream in pain. I took that as a good sign, and grabbed his hand, running out the door.

We barely got halfway down the street before they were on us. Black clad Shadowhunters, all weapons and cold efficiency. I felt Alec behind me immediately, his back pressed to mine in a defensive stance. My fingertips crackled with magic as I deflected a blow from a seraph blade I heard the clang of metal on metal and I knew Alec had pulled a blade from his belt where he'd stashed it before we left. We were purely on defensive, neither of us willing to lash out at people we had once considered friends. I felt a flicker of fear and guilt when I recognised one of them- Helen Blackthorn. Her face was cold, eyes furious as she attempted to lay into me with her blade.

...Did she know?

The fight did not last long. There were many of them, and even with magic, the two of us couldn't hold out forever. They were too efficient, too well trained. They'd driven us apart so we couldn't defend each other, and I heard Alec cry out behind me. As I turned, they used my momentary lapse in concentration and I found Helen Blackthorn's blade pressed against my throat. I stopped moving. Alec shrieked again, clawing desperately at the coil of a whip much like Isabelle's wound tightly around his neck. I could tell the mere touch of the metal was causing him pain, and were it not for the blade digging into my skin I would have run to his side in seconds.

"Father!" He shouted at a tall, dark haired figure I immediately recognised as Robert Lightwood. "Please! It's me!" When the foreboding man turned away, he screamed, "DAD!" There was pain in his voice, both physical and emotional. I could hear tears threatening to spill.

There was a brief moment of silence, broken only by Alec's ragged breathing, then Robert spoke, betraying no emotion.

"Take them to the portal."

They had us in iron cuffs, the cold metal biting my wrists and stopping the flow of magic to my fingertips. They had removed the electrum from around Alec's throat, much to both our relief, but the Shadowhunter carrying the weapon occasionally snapped it in his general direction, spurring him onwards. I had to swallow bile at the cruelty. Shadowhunters really had no mercy.

We walked side by side. Whilst I couldn't hold his hand for comfort, I could gently bump his arm with mine, and smile comfortingly at him when he looked up. His eyes were set hard, and I could tell he's gone into 'battle mode'- refusing to let emotion get the better of him in a trying situation. I examined the purplish bruiselike marks where the whip had touched him. It looked like a burn, only the skin was darker than it would have been in a human. Probably due to the colour of his blood. Fortunately it didn't seem to be hurting him too much, though you can't always tell with Alec. My own injuries were minimal. A few bruises and a soreness on my throat where the knife had been- I assumed there was a shallow cut there. Most of the attacks had been deflected by my magic, which had left me tired, but not overwhelmingly so. They had confiscated my bag, and I was a little worried about what they would do with it. There were some dangerous things in there.

The 'portal' they had been talking about was located in a deserted park, presumably with wards around it to keep mundanes out. There was a warlock there, one I knew. His name was Elijah Ruin, and he had the unlucky curse of hard green scales running from the nape of his neck all the way down his back and arms, culminating in a long lizard's tail, which was currently curling and uncurling nervously around his leg. Other than this, he was a relatively handsome young warlock- young being about fifty or so. We had met in the seventies, when he was still growing and changing. I had helped him come to terms with himself then. We had parted ways as acquaintances, and I had run into him a few times since then, and there had never been any animosity between us. Until now.

I narrowed my eyes at him. He seemed to start when he saw me, looking conflicted. Of course the Shadowhunters hadn't told him why he was needed. I suppose I couldn't blame him, but part of me hated him for helping those who would hurt me and my beloved.

"How're we going to get this one through the wards?" One of the younger Shadowhunters asked, jabbing Alec in the back with a seraph blade, making him hiss in pain. I gave the offending child my best 'back-off-or-I'll-kill-you' glare, but she ignored me.

Robert answered. God, I hated that man. "Easy. A way through can be created using its blood." I knew we were all thinking about the demon invasion in Idris back when Jonathan Morgernstern first showed his true colours. He had used his own, demonically tainted blood to take down the wards and let hordes of demons into the city. I bristled at them talking about Alec as if he was some common-or-garden Iblis demon, or other mindless riff raff like that.

The young Shadowhunter nodded, and they began to step through the portal one by one. When I was pushed forward, I stood fast, looking back at Alec.

"Move, Bane." I felt a sharp pain in the small of my back as Robert snapped at me. Alec's eyes told me to do as he said, even as the dagger in his father's hand dug further into my back, and I felt blood on my skin. I bit my lip, but obeyed, stepping through the portal.

After a brief moment of disorientation, I found myself standing outside the Gard. The gates to Idris were tall and imposing.

Alec followed soon after, still with a blade at his back. He wasn't putting up a fight, acting as if determined to prove he was still the honest, law-abiding Shadowhunter he once was. They stood at the gate, obviously waiting for someone on the other side to let them, and us, in. I heard a shout as those on the other side were alerted to our presence, and the huge, clear adamas bars parted, allowing passage into the Angel's sacred city. I could see the tell-tale shimmer in the air that signified the presence of a strong magical barrier. It looked like a heat haze hanging over the threshold. Our Shadowhunter escorts crossed with no problem at all. I had to be specially admitted, and I could feel a sense of unease and exposure wash over me, making me feel like I shouldn't be there. I knew that was the demon blood in me being repelled, but fortunately I was human enough to be allowed to remain.

Alec was another story.

Robert gestured to the younger Shadowhunter, indicating towards Alec. She sheathed her sword, and drew out a dagger with a channel down the centre of the blade. A dagger designed for collecting blood- a ritual dagger. She took Alec's wrist, still cuffed, and found the place where the purplish veins met under his skin. There she pressed the point of the knife, until a stream of ichor collected on the metal. Alec barely grimaced, but a ripple of unease went through the gathered Shadowhunters. Here was irrefutable proof of his being a demon. I wondered how many of them knew him as a Shadowhunter. Certainly Helen Blackthorn drew in a breath of shock, eyes dark with distrust. I could tell that her every instinct was telling her to execute him like she had done so many demons before him. Robert watched his son bleeding the black blood of the damned with a stony expression, but I could see confusion and fury warring in his eyes. For him to show even this minute amount of emotion meant it was affecting him deeply; Shadowhunters almost never allow themselves to be easily read. This in itself was what had caught my attention with Alec- he was an open book.

As the young Shadowhunter crossed the border into Idris with the ichor-stained dagger, the black liquid seemed to bubble and sizzle on the blade. Alec took half a step back in alarm before he was stopped, and I could tell the prospect of crossing the barrier was not a pleasant one.

I watched curiously as she smeared small amounts of his ichor onto either side of the gate, dripping the rest over the threshold. There was no immediate sign to tell that the barrier had been dispelled, but I noticed the air no longer shimmered at the mouth of the gate. Once again, they pushed Alec forwards. He dug his heels in, afraid to cross, but they forced him forwards regardless. He stumbled over the threshold, eyes shut, only to be met with no resistance. He stood straight, visibly relaxing, and I let out a breath I discovered I'd been holding subconsciously. I was suddenly overcome with an urge to run to him, to hold him and check if he was okay, but I knew I couldn't. When I opened my mouth to speak to him, I was reminded of that fact by a sharp jab to the ribs.

"Come on. Let's get this dealt with quickly. The Council will be waiting."

This caught my attention. They were going to bring us before the Council? That weighed both pros and cons in my mind. On one hand, we would potentially be allowed a trial, on the other, the council was not particularly lenient with Downworlders, even now, after the signing of the Accords. I wondered if the other Downworlder Council members would even be allowed to pass judgment. Especially when I had a demon by my side.

The journey through the winding corridors of the Gard brought back memories both good and bad; a long and wearisome battle had been fought here, and here Valentine had declared war on all Downworlders and those who sympathised with us. Yet this had also been the scene of Alec and I's first public demonstration of affection, where he had come out to the world with me beside him, and also where we had fought alongside one another in a way neither of us had fought before, bound body and mind, able to use the other's strengths and abilities, and to know each others' minds. It had been an unforgettable experience.

And the Accords hall I could see through the windows, standing tall and grand as ever in the distance, where he had kissed me in front of friends and family alike, finally letting go of his fears of rejection and denial. I wondered what they would do to us here. If they would condemn us to death in the same place that we finally took that step and decided to live.

I realised I didn't believe that would happen. Not really. I'd been through enough life-or-death situations and come out the other side practically unscathed (or at least not dead) to believe I could survive this one too. Sure, there was a chance that they'd kill me, but that chance seemed very slim. I was immortal. Never ending. A fixture. I wouldn't die now. Some time in the distant future, sure. When I was truly old.

I'm not old yet, am I?

With these scattered thoughts in my head, I was brought into the too-familiar Council hall, and saw that, indeed, the Council was already in place, looking down on our small party with a myriad of different expressions. Some curious, some angry, some disbelieving. I saw Catarina's unmistakeably blue face among the rows, frowning down on me in disapproval. I grinned half heartedly back at her. She'd skin me alive for this. Or at least what was left of me after the Shadowhunters had at me. I was surprised to see Raphael there too, draped over his seat as if it was a throne, looking sulky as usual. Meliorn was there, suspicious as ever, and so was Luke. Clearly he hadn't been able to shake off his family and friends, as a very familiar crowd watched us from the right. I figured Izzy and the others must have left pretty much immediately after she called us. Maybe she even called mid-journey. She had never expected us to be able to escape. That stung a little, but considering the current situation I couldn't exactly protest. Isabelle, Jace, Clary and Simeon or whatever his name was were predictably horrorstruck at our appearance. Maryse's expression was conflicted. I knew she'd been the one to tell them about us. She was the reason we were in chains. I glared at her. I hoped she found my freak's eyes suitably unnerving.

I felt Robert's hand on my shoulder, attempting to push me to my knees in front of the Council. I stood proudly, ignoring him.

"Kneel, warlock." He spat. I stayed silent. "Kneel before your superiors."

"I thought since the Accords we were equal. Or do you still hold Valentine's values close to your heart?"

He growled. "You are a convicted criminal. Shadowhunter or no, criminals are inferior."

"Innocent until proven guilty." I could tell he was getting riled up, but he stepped away before I could get in any more digs. I looked back at Alec, who had been kneeling, but who stood and walked to my side the second his captors stepped back. There was a mutter from the Council at our decision to stand before them, together. I smirked. Then Jia Penhallow stood.

"You have come before the Council to be tried and sentenced for your crimes. You are the warlock Magnus Bane, correct?"

I looked her directly in the eye. "Correct." My voice seemed to echo in the large hall.

She turned her attention to Alec.

"And you are...?"

His first attempt at speaking came out muffled, so he cleared his throat and tried again. "Alexander Gideon Lightwood," His voice was clear, if a little shaky.

Jia paused for a second, seeming to contemplate this. "You claim the name of a Shadowhunter. One who is known to have died little under three months ago."

He nodded. "Yes. I... I died."

"And you are aware that the dead do not simply get up and walk around again?"

"Well... I'm not dead anymore."

She raised an eyebrow. "Bringing souls back from the dead is known to be an impossible task. As a Shadowhunter you should know this."

"Yes... But it's not impossible! Just... Very unlikely to succeed." I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Oh Alexander.

"Can you prove before the Council that you are, in fact, the Shadowhunter known as Alexander Lightwood?"

Alec opened his mouth to speak, then shut it again, thinking. "Um... I am nineteen years old, I have a sister, Isabelle Lightwood, and a brother, Jace Herondale. Obviously he's not my real brother. He came to our family when he was ten. We're parabatai. ...Were parabatai." He paused. "...I had another brother. Max. He was killed by Valentine's son. Jonathan Morgernstern."

There was a brief silence.

"This is common knowledge. It would not have been difficult to find out."

Alec bit his lip, thinking. He seemed to come to a conclusion, blurting out "I came out to my family and friends as gay by kissing Magnus in the Accords hall before the battle last year."

"Everyone knows that!" A voice called from the left. "Anyone who was in the hall that day could tell you that! It was a spectacle!" Alec blushed.

"What about his parabatai rune? Surely that could prove it." Another voice piped up.

"I don't have it anymore..."

"That rune is permanent. It cannot be removed."

"My original body was burned. I don't have any of my old runes or scars."

"How convenient." Robert sneered, stepping forward. "I can tell you now that this... Creature is not my son. My child died, killed by a demon. An honourable Shadowhunter's death. And that a demon should attempt to take his place-" There was uproar at this comment. Shadowhunters mainly, screaming at the presence of a demon in their beloved city.

"He cannot be!"

"The wards, they keep them out-"

"A demon impersonating a Shadowhunter!"

Alec shrank back, pressing himself to me against the onslaught of their rage. I kissed his hair comfortingly, whispering in his ear.

"It'll be alright. We'll be fine."

"QUIET!" Jia's voice left silence in its wake, although people still looked unsettled. She took a breath, calming herself. "Bane." I looked up at her. "Is this boy you are so attached to a demon?"

I licked my lips a little nervously. "I did not intend it so, but my father likes to play tricks on me. He made Alec like this to spite me and all those who care for him."

Jia frowned. "Your father did this? How can you be sure he did not have one of his subordinates take the shape of your beloved and send it to take his place?"

I glanced at Alec before responding. "I watched him perform the spell that crafted Alec's new body. I watched him pull Alec's soul from the ether and join the two. I held Alec in my arms as he woke. This is no mindless minion of my father's. This is the man I love."

Jia did not appear to have a response for this. However someone else did.

"You cannot trust what this warlock says!" My least favourite Shadowhunter was up in arms again, pushing his way forward to stand in front of the two of us, thunder in his eyes. "I will not have my son's memory tarnished by this abomination!"

I felt Alec flinch against me.

"DAD! I heard Isabelle's strident voice, and saw she had stood up.

"Isabelle Lightwood, please sit!" Jia bellowed, trying to restore order. But Isabelle wouldn't have it.

"Can't you just be grateful he's not dead and gone forever?! Don't you think he's been through enough already?! He's your son-!"

"HE IS NOT MY SON!" Robert roared. "HE IS A FILTHY DEMON COME TO RUIN WHAT IS LEFT OF OUR FAMILY!"

"Robert, please. We don't have proof enough-"

"YOU WANT PROOF?" And he whirled on us, pulling Alec away from me and pushing him forward hard enough that he fell to his knees. In one swift motion he pulled out his seraph blade...

...And ran Alec through.


	15. Doubt

Magnus POV

I stood, speechless. The entire hall was deathly quiet, except for Alec's ragged breathing. Black blood dripped from the tip of the blade, unmistakeably inhuman.

"Robert, please." Jia's voice was shaky. "Sheathe your weapon."

Alec let out a hoarse cry as the sword was pulled from between his ribs. He collapsed onto all fours, coughing up copious amounts of ichor. When he wiped his mouth with a pale, trembling hand, it came away black. When Robert backed away, I ran to Alec's side, dropping to my knees beside him, just in time for him to keel over into my lap. I could feel him struggling to breathe. Though I couldn't hold him, I could gently brush his hair from his face and stroke his cheek comfortingly.

"Magnus...?" His voice was barely a whisper, followed by a nastily wet cough.

"Yes love?" My own voice was surprisingly steady.

"Am I going to hell?"

"For a brief visit, perhaps. But you know what demons are like. You'll find your way back here. One way or another. Even if I have to summon you myself."

He sort of smiled. "I can't imagine being summoned."

"I'm sure it's a very weird experience. If you see my father, tell him I said hi."

"Sure. I'll... I'll see you soon, if I can."

"You will, Alec. Demons don't die in this world."

"Love you." With those words, he fell still.

And so Alec died under my hands for the second time.

Only this time his body didn't stay. It crumbled away to nothing even as I muttered, "Love you too..."

Then I was alone, and I looked up at the Lightwoods. Isabelle met my eyes. I saw hers were wet with tears, but I nodded, and she understood. He wasn't really dead. Just somewhere else, for now.

I whirled on Robert, letting my anger get the better of me.

"HOW DARE YOU!" I got right up in his face, using my slight height advantage against him, causing him to back up a step. I knew that if my wrists weren't cuffed in iron my fingertips would be crackling with uncontrolled magic. "How dare you, Robert Lightwood. How dare you hurt him like that, without even giving him a chance to prove what he said was truth." My voice was cold, and though I did not speak loudly I knew everyone in the hall could hear me. "You are no better now than you were when I first met you. You are no better now than when you assisted in the torture and murder of an innocent pack of werewolves." He flinched. Good. "Intolerant, intolerable, pigheaded SCUM!" At this last word, I was yanked back, restrained by two Shadowhunters before I could strike him like I wanted to. I struggled, baring my teeth and growling in a way I only did when truly irate. "YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN VALENTINE HIMSELF!" A chorus of gasps rang out and the Consul's voice rang out, commanding.

"ENOUGH, WARLOCK!" Still glaring, I regained my composure, pulling my arms away from the Shadowhunters and standing up straight, looking up at Jia whilst pointedly ignoring Robert.

"Right. Inquisitor, your actions will be discussed and dealt with accordingly," I stifled a laugh. Jia glared at me. "In the meantime, we must proceed with the trial.

Magnus Bane, you stand accused of using dark magic without consent, in full awareness of the law which prohibits doing so. Do you deny these actions?"

I took a second to consider my answer. I weighed my guilt with my desire to live, taking into account other people's (Alec's) opinions on the matter.

"I do not believe my actions should be considered a threat such as dark magic is seen."

"Mr Bane, that was not the question. Do you deny using necromancy, a clearly forbidden magical practice?"

I certainly couldn't lie my way out of this one. They'd seen Alec. "...No."

"And you are aware that these actions carry severe penalties?"

"Yes."

"Mr Bane, can you please testify before the Council what exactly happened?"

"Alec died. I summoned my father and asked him to bring him back. He did so."

"Your father?"

"...Yes."

"Are you suggesting that the only reason your attempt was successful was because of your familial bond with this demon?"

"That is presumably the case."

"Can you tell us which demon it was?" I found my eyes flicking to Raphael. The young-looking vampire was one of very few who knew my heritage, alongside the younger Lightwoods and acquaintances now. I didn't like people knowing. It made me a threat, being of such powerful blood. A target.

"That is not information I feel comfortable imparting."

Jia's expression was somewhat unreadable. She seemed displeased by this. To my relief, Raphael did not speak up. He still held my honour, for now.

"Why do you not want to share this? Is your blood something to be ashamed of?" Another Council member asked.

"Is any demon parentage anything to be proud of?" I responded. She didn't seem to have an answer to that.

"Perhaps you would feel more comfortable discussing this matter in a more... Secure setting?" Jia's tone indicated this was not what she wanted. I raised an eyebrow.

"Is that a threat, Consul?"

"I am afraid, Mr Bane, that without proof of your innocence I cannot let you go without punishment, and until you are proven to be a threat to our community I cannot impart the proper sentence."

I stuck my chin in the air defiantly. "You mean kill me." She broke eye contact, glancing around the Council.

"Until we can get more information on the matter, we must come to a decision. If the Council has no objections, you will be detained in the prisons of the Silent City until the time at which such a choice can be made." No sooner had she finished speaking, then Isabelle stood. Maryse pulled her sleeve, encouraging her to remain seated, but she was ignored.

"I object. Magnus is not a threat to us!"

"Isabelle Lightwood, as you are underaged, you are not a full Council member and therefore cannot pass judgment." As Isabelle opened her mouth to argue back, another voice spoke up.

"Then I will." In that moment I had never loved Catarina Loss more. "I have known Magnus Bane for more than three hundred years. He has been foolish, yes, but never has he been an evil man or a threat to society." Even as she argued my case, she refused to look at me. I rolled my eyes.

It was at that point that Helen Blackthorn stepped in. I couldn't remember the last time so many people had paid so much attention to me at once.

"I'd like to remind the Consul, and the whole Council that he is currently a prime suspect in the disappearance of my little brother."

I froze, immediately throwing up defences preventing myself from giving anything away. I'd be murdered where I stood if that got out.

Not that I didn't deserve it.

"Well, Bane? What do you say to this accusation?"

Time for some fast talking. "I don't understand where Miss Blackthorn could have pulled such a thing from. I am acquainted with the family, but I am by no means close to them. The boy can't have been much older than ten, am I right? What use would I have for a ten year old?"

"Magnus isn't a kidnapper!" Isabelle had stood once more. "If you want someone to blame for that, why not Sebastian?" Another ripple went through the onlookers. "He's attacking other Institutes, isn't he? What if he's targeting LA next?"

"Unless you have some information on the whereabouts of Jonathan Morgernstern-"

"Come on, he's way more likely to have done it than Magnus! I mean... It's not like it's the first time he attacked a child..." Her voice wavered, but she stood strong.

"Then why didn't he attack the rest of us?" Helen argued.

"Well... Maybe he was doing recon, and Ty saw him. He couldn't let his whereabouts be known."

This seemed a plausible enough explanation, so Helen backed down.

"This is a valid point. Helen, I would recommend you return to your Institute so that, should an attack be on the cards, you can be prepared. I assure you your brother's disappearance is high on our list of priorities, but without any eyewitnesses, we cannot easily be sure what happened, and therefore it would be wrong to pin the blame on anyone. As for you, Bane," Jia turned her attention back to me, "You will be kept in the Silent City until further evidence of your innocence or guilt comes to light."

As I was lead away from the hall, I heard Isabelle protesting loudly, and loudly being told to be quiet.

I went calmly, knowing that any attempt at fighting or running would only prove my guilt. Far better to act as if I was sure I would be proven innocent and let off scot free. Neither of my escorts said a word to me as they led me to the nearest entrance to the Silent City. As ever, the tall, cloaked Silent Brothers stood vigilant as we were led past them. I wondered if I would spot a certain Jian Carstairs, but I didn't see any faces I recognised. As we went deeper and deeper, the light became dimmer. The world around me faded into shades of black and white, though I could still see thanks to my unusual eyes. The Shadowhunters took up their Witchlights when it got too dark for them, and their cold light flooded the solemn halls. The silence was, for fear of sounding cliché, deafening. Even our footsteps and breathing sounded muffled down here. It set my nerves on edge.

Eventually, miles underground, we reached our destination. The cell was down a long hall, and, as far as I could tell, there were no other prisoners nearby. That was slightly worrying, but I retained my calm outward composure. They locked me in, though they didn't remove my handcuffs. I suppose that was to ensure I didn't attempt any magical escapades. Not that they'd do much anyway. These sort of places were insulated against that kind of thing.

Once they had left, taking their light with them, I examined my new surroundings. It wasn't entirely unpleasant; I had been in worse places. It had all the basic amenities. I sat on the relatively clean mattress they had provided, giving my aching feet a rest after hours of standing. In a contrast to most classic dungeons, the air felt dry and even slightly warm instead of damp and cold. I supposed the Shadowhunters liked to keep their precious underground city well kept.

My mind quickly went to Alec. I wondered what he was experiencing at that moment. The fact that his body hadn't remained in this dimension confirmed my theory, I was sure. He'd have returned to my father's realm. Though the extent of the damage couldn't necessarily be predicted. Greater Demons' minds could be scattered across realms if they were killed in a dimension that was not their own, and it could take centuries for them to pull all the pieces of themselves together again. I didn't know what that was like, but I sincerely hoped that hadn't happened to Alec, that he was whole, wherever he was. Then I wondered if it would be possible to summon him. I assumed so, I'd just substitute his name into a generic summoning spell I knew. Having been around him a lot would probably help- I would hopefully have some imprint of his magic on me, which would make calling him to me much easier.

I guessed I'd just have to survive long enough to be able to do so.


	16. Lost

Alec POV

The first thing I was aware of was dust. The ground beneath me felt rough with it. It blew over my skin, tickling me. I shivered.

When I opened my eyes, I saw a red sky. Like fire, a small part of my mind said. I frowned. What's fire?

I pushed myself up, first onto all fours, then, when that felt wrong, my feet. I overbalanced at first, then got my bearings. I looked down at myself. Pale... Thin and vulnerable. Protection... I needed protection. My head spun a little. I felt off. Empty. The gritty, dusty dirt beneath my feet was hot. Instinct told me to move. Go on, find shelter and food. Avoid danger. I felt weak. Exposed.

The land seemed to stretch on forever. Just dust, and dirt, and rock. I walked, and walked. A couple times, I thought I heard a noise, felt a presence somewhere near, but when I looked there was nothing. I was confused, and wary, but I kept going. Eventually I found a cave, somewhere to shelter from the vast expanse of desert. My skin felt sore and my legs ached. My mind could only form the most basic of thoughts, so it led me to rest. I was hungry, too, but that could wait. For now, I curled up in the protective dark, and slept.

Some time later, I awoke to a strange skittering noise. It sent a shiver down my spine, my skin prickling. I twitched. Opening my eyes, I saw darkness. The skittering sound stopped, and I looked around, immediately on my guard. First, there was nothing. Then a movement in the darkness caught my eye. Acting purely on instinct, I snarled, baring my teeth. The thing shrank back, getting close to the floor. It was showing submissiveness, I realised. Acknowledging I was in charge. I relaxed a little as it crawled closer, though I still acted defensively. Its body was skinny, its limbs long and gangly. Wet looking, straggly hair clung to its head and it had a pair of sharp-looking horns sticking out of its forehead. When it looked up, its face was mischievous, splitting open into a wide grin. It made a series of short, sharp noises in its throat. A giggle, my mind recognised. It was laughing. Then it began making new noises, strange and varied. The sound seemed to awaken a new part of my brain, and suddenly the noises had meaning.

"-curious one, yesss... Looks human. From the green world. Nice, whole, pretty world... But demon it is, demon like me. I sense power... You are powerful, no?" It blinked at me, and its eyes reflected what little light there was in the cave. I blinked, confused. It giggled again. "Its mind is gone, yes, yes, it has been scattered... The Angelkin got you, didn't they? Light ones, with their star blades and burning knives... But they can't come here, no, here is safe. Only humans here are demon minded. Think like usss..." It's voice trailed into a hiss towards the end. "Red ones. Led by the one they call Son of Lilith. But you are not one of them... Too much demon. No human blood, just human face. I sense your power, and I would follow you..."

My throat cracked when I first tried to use my voice, and the noises startled me, sounding familiar. But that part of my mind that translated the demon's speech into meaning knew what to do.

"Who... Who are you?"

"I am oni. My name is-" and here it made a noise which did not translate. A sharp, throaty sound. I attempted to repeat it.

"K... Khir-ka?"

It nodded, and said it again. "Khirka. Do you have a name?"

"I... I don't know..." I searched my brain. I had a faint idea, but it was hard to reach. I abandoned it, in favour of a new idea. "You said you would follow me. Why?"

It clicked its tongue at me, seeming amused. "It does not know its own power. I am weak, you are strong. I follow. I serve. You protect. It is agreed, yes?"

I frowned, but nodded. Until I knew where I was, who I was and what to do, this creature, Khirka, could help me.

"What does the master want? I will provide."

"Um... Protection." The creature paused, thinking.

"The red ones have our metal. They steal from usss... They bend it into sharp things and fake scales for wearing... But then they die. And we take their metal and keep it. The hoarders, yess, they take it. Hide it in their holes and sleep on it. Pretty, pretty metal... Come with, we find you metal for your coat and blades for your claws, human one." The creature scampered to the cave mouth, making the same skittering noise I had woken up o, and stood, beckoning me forwards. Its hands were wide and flat. Hesitantly, I followed. It moved quickly, always a little way ahead of me, stopping and waiting for me to catch up when I fell too far behind. It seemed to know where it was going, and slowly the land got more rough and rocky. The stones cut my feet, but I ignored the pain. I could swear I saw... A mountain? In the distance. Tall and jagged, but somehow organised.

Khirka stopped, loping over to me and resting one hand on my shoulder. Its skin was cold, scaly and faintly green in the dim light. It pointed to the rocky structure. "That is where Lilith's son hides. Red ones swarm it. They are not dangerous unless we get too close. Look for holes in ground. That is where the hoarders hide." I nodded, and began scanning the dirt. We started to make our way around the structure; palace, some disjointed part of my mind said. I frowned. That word sounded weird. Soft. I didn't know why.

"Here, here!" Khirka bounded over to a rocky outcropping, where jagged slabs of stone jutted out from the dirt. It disappeared under the stone for a second, then stuck its head up, reptilian yellow eyes practically glowing. "Come, yesss. But quiet. We don't wake the hoarder." I followed, stopping and looking down into the hole. It was wide, and declined steeply into a dark tunnel. Covered as it was by the rocks, it wouldn't have easily been seen. Khirka had slid down the slope into the darkness, and I could just see the glimmering reflection in its eyes, the only points of light. I stepped onto the slope, found a rough footing and ran down into the supposed hoarder's lair. I almost over balanced when I hit flat ground, but Khirka grabbed me, keeping me upright. I nodded thanks. It put one long finger to its mouth, signalling me to be quiet, and began to head into the darkness. I held out my palm, the purple flames held in it just light enough for me to be able to see without being a disturbance. We crept along, our footsteps silent and breathing light. The tunnel slowly descended, winding around erratically. Eventually we came to a wider part, a kind of den. It was warm and stuffy, and I thought I heard a heavy breathing from somewhere in the dark. My foot came down on something hard, and I gasped. Looking at it, I saw that it was a polished circle of metal. I picked it up. It had strange markings on it, and an image of a face. Khirka grabbed my wrist suddenly, making me jump a little. It dragged me forward and to the side a touch. I dropped the metal thing, and it clinked. We both winced, but nothing else happened. Khirka led me to a small pile of scraps of things, shiny rocks, metal objects, chips of a glassy material that looked as though it was filled with black smoke. The green demon pulled a large roll of something from the back of the pile, careful to disturb as little as possible. The material it handed to me was black, but shined a little in the faint light. It felt bumpy and rough. Khirka whispered in my ear.

"Ravener hide. Enchanted Ravener hide. You wear." I unrolled the material and draped it over my shoulders like a cape. When it began to constrict around me, I panicked and tried to wrestle it off, but all it did was fit itself to my shape. It covered my arms, chest and thighs, like a tunic. It was seamless and tight, although flexible. Ideal material to fight in. Khirka seemed to be awaiting my approval. I nodded. It ran off again, and I heard a series of clanking noises. They weren't loud, but they still made me wince. The ever present breathing didn't falter, so I relaxed. This time, I was presented with a series of flat plates joined together by links, all made of the darkly clouded, glassy material. With a little help, I managed to find an appropriate way to wear it. It was heavy, but I quickly grew accustomed to it as it wasn't too taxing for my strength. It protected my chest, my shoulders and my stomach. The thinner plates fell over my legs, but still left my knees and shins unprotected. Still, all the vital bits were covered. That made me feel slightly more secure.

We continued to scour the various piles of seemingly random stuff for any weapons I could use. I found some small knives, but discarded them, looking for a larger weapon. After a while, I found something that looked like a giant thorn. It was half buried in shrapnel, but I pulled it out anyway. Bad move. The bits and pieces of metal slid to the floor like an avalanche, crashing and clanging all the way to the ground. I froze, gripping the thing I'd found tightly. It was a long, swordlike weapon, about two and a half feet long, with a second, shorter blade protruding just above the hilt. The entire thing was jet black, and unnaturally light. When I looked down at the rubble collecting at my feet, I saw a second. I reached for it, but stopped when I heard Khirka's scream. I looked up, and saw a shadow stirring on top of one of the larger piles of junk. Suddenly the cavern was filled with the sounds of metal clanging and scraping. The creature drew itself up. It was easily twice my height, with grey, scaly skin and long limbs topped with wicked claws. It had a reptilian face, and when it bared its teeth at me they were jagged and uneven, sticking out of its mouth like bristles. I quickly picked up the second sword and went into a defensive stance, my body somehow knowing exactly what to do. The thing lunged at me, and I jumped to one side, avoiding it. Its head smashed into the wall of the cavern, momentarily stunning it. I used that opportunity to jump on its back, and drove my swords into the back of its neck. They didn't go in very far. The creature shrieked fury and pain, and whirled around, throwing my off. I hit the ground hard, and my head rang. I saw the beast heading for me, but when I attempted to get up, my palm hit a jagged bit of metal. I gasped in pain as it gashed my hand open. The thing was just about on me when Khirka jumped in, having found a makeshift weapon in a long metal spike that looked like it had come off a gate or something. The distraction was just enough for me to pick myself up. I looked down at my hand but it was already healing, the ichor having stopped flowing and the cut knitting itself back together. I felt a slight drain, but it wasn't enough to be a problem.

With Khirka drawing the thing's attention away from me, I was free to get around behind it, and look for a weak spot. I analysed the thing's body. It was shaped roughly like mine, only bigger and leaner, like a cross between a human and a snake, and it was covered in thick grey scales. Thin streams of black trickled from the twin holes in the back of the thing's neck, where I had stabbed it. Its armour was tough indeed to be barely harmed by a blow like that. I'd need a more powerful weapon. The black metal thorns in my hands seemed to sing a little, resonating as I let energy run through my palms; blades infused with demonic power would surely do the trick. I couldn't tell how I knew to do this, I just did. It was as natural as breathing.

When the swords were wreathed in flickering violet flames, I shouted for the thing's attention. It screamed at me as it turned, its jagged teeth bared at me. A rough growl started in my throat in response. I brandished my swords. It lashed out at me, and I parried its claws away, thick and long as swords as they were. It hissed as I jabbed forwards, cutting a shallow gash in the side of its throat as it dodged. Thick black ichor ran over its grey scales. It launched itself at me again and we began a lethal dance, slash and parry, slash and parry, left right and centre. It landed a strike on my thigh, but the thick metal plates protected my skin from harm. They didn't protect my hands though, and the tip of its claw caught the back of my hand, tearing a jagged gash. I gritted my teeth in pain, but felt grateful that it hadn't hit anything more important.

The battle went on for a little while, and I began to feel the fatigue in my limbs, but my opponent's attacks were slowing too. I had left a good few cuts on it, and its strength seemed to be waning. Finally, it presented a weak spot: its left foreleg dropped to its side, wounded, leaving its side open. I took the opportunity, swinging my blade at the exposed area. The creature screamed as I cut through it, black gore oozing out of the torn flesh. It collapsed, writhing. I stepped closer, and, with a single motion, beheaded it. Ichor pumped from its slit throat, running over the dirt floor. I stepped back to avoid getting it on my bare feet. Khirka, who had been hiding behind a particularly tall pile of junk, came out and stood over the beast. Grinning, the green-skinned demon spoke.

"See? Master is powerful indeed, yesss. Can take on demons thrice his size. You see?"

I nodded, and searched the rubble for something I could use as a sheath. I found a strip of tough fabric-like material in a violent shade of red, and tied it around my waist. The shorter points which came off the main body of the blades served as a hook to keep them hanging off the makeshift belt. The cavern had filled with a thick, meaty smell, coppery and gross. I beckoned Khirka to follow, and we left the creature's hole. Khirka had scavenged a number of small trinkets: a dagger, a couple of metal bracelets and a few round, sharp-edged discs which I sort of recognised, but couldn't quite put a name to. It was playing with them, pushing the bracelets up to its shoulders to get them to stay in place, throwing the disks then running to pick them up. I watched with amusement until it put them away, into a sling made of the same material as my 'belt'.

"So where to now?" I asked. The oni shrugged, running to my side.

"I take you to city maybe, or we hunt red ones, or..." It gasped, suddenly looking excited. "We go to The Rift. With you maybe we can explore the Green Realm. No Angelkin will bother us! Though... They already got you, didn't they?" I blinked. I couldn't remember anything since I woke up, so I didn't know what he was talking about. "...Still. You are strong. And they have many, many nice things there... No desert in the Green Realm. Only life, and energy, makes you feel strong..." It danced off a little bit, lost in thoughts of this so called 'Green Realm'. I nodded.

"Alright then. We'll go there."

The rift was terrifying. On our way there, we had encountered a few other demons. Not many of them had anything to say. Some of them I couldn't even tell if they could talk. Their bodies were twisted, strange. I couldn't tell which end was which on the weirdest ones. But none of them bothered us. Some even went out of their way to get out of our path. Khirka explained that this was probably because they could sense my power, and didn't want to earn my wrath. I replied saying that I wasn't going to get mad at something for standing in front of me. Apparently I was one of the nicer demons.

When we arrived at our destination, I found the area far more busy than the open plains. Demons swarmed towards the distortion in the air that could only be the rift. It appeared to tear the very land open. It was difficult to isolate exactly where solid ground blurred into the shimmering, shifting hole. It danced, avoiding being looked at directly. When a creature reached it, I simply seemed to lose sight of it, and suddenly it wasn't there anymore. The prospect of actually walking into the swirling mass wasn't an inviting one. But Khirka pushed eagerly onwards, and I had no choice but to follow the green-skinned demon before I lost it.

I didn't actually realise we had reached the rift, as abstract as it was, until I noticed that my surroundings were blurred, like I was extremely near sighted. I blinked a couple of times, like that was gonna clear my vision, and pressed forwards, hoping the world would right itself. I felt a breath of cold air, which made me realise how warm the demon realm had been. The ravener hide protected most of me from the cold, but my legs, still bare, prickled with discomfort. The world around me swirled with new colour, and I realised what Khirka had meant. Where the demon realm was all painted in rusty reds and browns, these new surroundings were crisp, fresh blues and greens. My bare feet touched something tickly and soft. I looked down, and saw waving fronds of vivid greenery. After the hard stones and gritty dust of the plains, it felt like I was walking on clouds. Around me, my fellow demons spread out, disappearing off over hills and through the sky. Khirka stood a few feet away, waiting for me.

"Haven't you been here before?"

I shook my head. "Memory loss." My companion nodded, and scampered off once more. I followed. "Where are we going exactly?"

Khirka grinned. "Exploring."


	17. Agony

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Caution! Contains torture

Magnus POV

I was decidedly bored. Worried, yes. Scared, yes. But also unmistakably, unavoidably bored. The dark cell provided no entertainment whatsoever. Time eluded me, and I felt like it had been at least a day, but in reality it had probably only been a few hours. I was starting to get hungry. So when I heard echoing footsteps approaching, I looked up, interested, hoping they'd bring something passable to eat. And when Robert Lightwood's unmistakable form became recognisable, my expression became sour and I drew my knees to my chest, shutting him out. He stood just outside my cell, just out of reach. Smart man.

"Come to gloat, Robert?" He gritted his teeth, clearly loathing being in my presence. I was taken back to the first time I had seen him. He was still as stern and hawklike as ever, and now glared at me with the same hatred he had worn all those years ago. It was eerie.

"I'm here for a confession, Bane." I was surprised he hadn't stooped to a simple 'warlock', instead of referring to me by name.

"If you're looking for an excuse to kill me, I'm not going to give you one."

"Something's not right. The situation is too convenient for you." I narrowed my eyes, the gold in them no doubt glinting in the semi-light.

"What are you accusing me of?"

"Why would you be summoning demons now? We're on the cusp of a war."

It didn't take me long to figure out where he was coming from. And I was instantly horrified.

"You think I'm working with Sebastian?!"

Robert snapped, "Don't use that name. Sebastian Verlac was an honourable man; he doesn't deserve for that monster to take that from him."

"Fine. Jonathan."

"Yes. I can't see any other reason why you would be summoning demons to take the place of members of our rank."

"I WAS NOT TRYING TO REPLACE ALEC," And there was the line. He'd crossed it. I strode to the edge of my cell, pressing my face to the cage and death glaring as I snarled at him from between the bars. "I love him. How dare you accuse me of that."

He matched my glare, though the mention of his son had clearly rattled him.

"Then how do you explain the abomination you brought before us?"

"I already told you. There were unforeseen complications. That doesn't mean he's not Alec." Part of me was glad Alec wasn't here to hear this- it would destroy him. The other part desperately wanted him in my arms. For the thousandth time, I wondered if he was okay, wherever he was. I hoped he wasn't in any trouble.

"Unforseen complications in the black magic spell you were doing. Forgive me if I fail to see your innocence." Robert spat.

"I won't deny I broke the law by doing that spell. But I will deny any accusations you place on me in terms of working with that hellspawn you call Jonathan Morgenstern."

"So you confess to being guilty?"

"Yes. However let me clarify: is it illegal to pay a warlock to summon a demon for your own ends?" Robert raised an eyebrow. "You're saying someone paid you to do it?"

"This is a purely hypothetical scenario."

"Yes. It is."

"And you're aware this is a widely common practice?"

Robert gritted his teeth. "Yes..."

"And... Of course you will know of the events preceding the battle with the Endarkened. After all, it is not a secret that your children were the ones who convinced me to summon the Greater Demon Azazel in order to obtain a weapon which could sever the connection between Jace Herondale and Jonathan Morgenstern." I looked at him pointedly, my eyes flashing in the dark. "So how come when it's a group of Shadowhunters orchestrating the affair for the benefit of Shadowhunters, it is entirely overlooked, and when it is a warlock orchestrating the summoning of a demon to his own ends it is considered a crime worth locking me in the Silent City for?" I inspected my nails in an openly passive-aggressive manner. "That seems awfully speciesist. I'm sure the newly appointed council members will not take that kind of discrimination lightly if I were to... Drop the subject into my next trial."

I wasn't sure if I was winning or if I had just made a very large mistake when I saw the irate look on Robert's face.

"...I know you know something, warlock. And I'm going to get it out of you."

"And how do you plan on doing that? I'm sure you won't follow in the footsteps of your predecessor and attempt to starve me into a confession."

"No." Robert glared at me, pure hate in his eyes. "That takes too long."

I raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me..." I shifted where I stood, my muscles tensing as the implication set in. He barely moved.

"This is your last chance to come forward. When I return, I won't be so lenient as to ask nicely."

My mouth went dry, and I considered. If I told him, I'd be killed. There was no question about that. If I didn't, I'd have to bear pain. Lots of it. I had no doubt he would have no qualms with pushing me to the edge and beyond; in his eyes, I was the cause of his son's corruption, even his death. And now I was a possible ally of the creature who had murdered his youngest in cold blood. Couple that with his already existing prejudice against my kind, and I was no doubt the lowest of the low to him, deserving of no compassion or mercy.

In short, it would be torture.

In comparison, a quick execution would be far more desirable, given he'd probably find an excuse to kill me either way. And yet I'd have time. I'd have as long as I could hold myself together to figure out a way out. There would be hope, even if it was doubtful and highly unlikely. But was it worth it?

And then there was Alec. I thought of him. I thought of how he'd feel if I died. How I felt when he died. I had seen what simply breaking up with him had done; he'd fallen apart. He'd let his emotions get the better of him, become reckless and endangering to himself and those around him. And this would be worse. Much worse. And this, coupled with his new, volatile abilities, could end disastrously. If he had thrown a knife at me with intent to harm provoked by nothing more than frustration at being unable to grasp a new ability, there was no telling what he'd do if... If I died.

That settled it. I would not be responsible for any more death. I already held far too much on my shoulders.

"I did nothing." I spat.

"So be it." Robert's cold eyes held my gaze a moment longer before he turned and walked away.

I was left alone once more, and the darkness became so much more oppressive with the weight of my future settling itself uncomfortably in my chest. I sank back onto the thin mattress, staring at the hard floor, grey as the darkness made everything around me. Suddenly I was immensely grateful I could see at all. Most poor souls they locked in here would be in what they perceived as pitch darkness, which would be all the more terrifying. If left for long enough, it could even drive them mad.

As for me, it would not be sensory deprivation that would take my mind. It would be the guilt, the anticipation, the worry and, most likely, the pain.

With a sigh, I lay back. Nothing to do now but wait and brace myself for what was to come.

I must have fallen asleep. How I didn't know, what with the racing thoughts in my head, but the day must have caught up with me, because it was with a massive shock that the clanging of metal woke me. Before I had even registered my situation, I was bolt upright, assessing my competition. When one of the Shadowhunters who had invaded my cell reached out to grab me, I swung at them with my cuffs. The iron struck them in the face and they fell back. I jumped to my feet, taking in the scene before me. Two black- clad figures, lit by torches held in previously unnoticed wall brackets were closing in on me, bearing what appeared to be black batons. Clearly they did not intend to kill me, only to subdue me.

The mattress under my feet meant I was slightly unsteady, and my back pressed against the wall. I was immediately tense, aware of everything around me. I had only a brief moment to register all this before the other one launched at me. I dodged, pushing them with my shoulder hard enough to throw them off balance. I wasn't going to be able to hold them off for long. The door was wide open, inviting me to make a break for it, and my every instinct pulled me to freedom. I ran, pushing past my other attacker with every ounce of my strength. The adrenaline rush meant I was fast, and they clearly hadn't expected me to fight back, but the element of surprise couldn't protect me forever. They got up quickly, and I heard them chase me down the hall.

I didn't get far. They recovered quickly, and I was not built for combat the same way they were. I felt a lash curl around my ankle, and I fell hard. They were on me in an instant, and I felt a striking blow against the back of my skull. Pain rang in my head, and I collapsed. Stunned, I felt one of them pull me up, attempting to force me back into my cell. When I tried to fight back, the other delivered a firm kick to my side, straight in the ribs. I gasped for breath, head ringing as I struggled for air, all the fight knocked out of me. I felt hot blood on the back of my neck as they dragged me back to the cell and chained me to the wall, my hands above my head, leaving me unable to protect myself. My head pounded, and my arms already felt strain from holding the weight of my body, as I couldn't stand thanks to the weakness and dizziness caused by being winded.

The two Shadowhunters who had chained me up left, and I was left to catch my breath. Eventually I was able to stand, though I leaned heavily on the wall. I found I could turn around if I wanted, though that was about the extent of the movement I was able to do.

When Robert arrived, I pulled against the cuffs in a futile attempt to look less vulnerable. He carried a lash- not a long whip designed for wrapping around its victim to hinder them- no, this one had a noticeably spiked tip. It was designed to cause pain. My eyes widened, and I pressed against the wall, as far away from him as possible. In his other hand was a short knife.

He advanced on me, grabbing my shirt and slicing through it with the knife. When I made to kick him off me, he dug the blade into my hip, making me gasp in pain.

"Hey." I growled through gritted teeth. "That was designer." He grunted and threw what was left of it aside, leaving me bare chested. He glanced with disgust at my flat, unmarked stomach, the second mark of my inhumanity.

"You know the rules. Confess, and I will cease."

"I've told you. I have nothing to confess to."

He snorted derisively, and stepped back. I gritted my teeth in preparation. The first lash struck me from jaw to nonexistent navel, a line of fire that stung my skin. I felt blood. The second made me flinch, catching me on the shoulder as I turned away to protect my face. From this position I couldn't see when the lash would land, so the next, across my left shoulder blade, made me jump. So far I hadn't done any more than gasp, but as he struck me again and again, my flesh was exposed and the cuts were made deeper and more painful. Before long my whole back felt like it was on fire, and I let out my first cry as the metal tip laid open muscle, blood from the wounds trickling into cuts and across skin, making me itch. I was in agony, the lash finally drawing screams as I swore it would hit bone. I knew what would make it stop; all I had to do was tell the truth. But I couldn't. For Alec. So I took the pain, trying and failing to escape into my mind.

It lasted ages. I almost blacked out several times, only to be jerked back into consciousness by another wave of pain as the lash fell again. I was sure my back was mincemeat; it sure felt like it, open and bleeding in so many places. When I sagged in my chains, the chafing and straining of my wrists no longer deterrent enough to remain standing, the lashes stopped. Robert had apparently figured out that I would pass out before I could talk at this rate.

"Don't make me do this again, Bane."

My mind was bleary, my thoughts slurred and incoherent against the torture, but still I managed to mumble, "Yeah right. You enjoy it."

"You're working with Morgernstern. I know it."

"M'not!" I yelled with as much force as I could. "I jus' wanted my Alec back!"

Before I could realise what had happened, my torturer's hand was at my throat, pinning me against the wall. The cold bit into my open wounds, simultaneously unpleasant and soothing as it quenched the fire. Robert pressed harder, cutting off my air. My vision swam.

"He was never your Alec. You could never lay claim on my son, filthy Downworlder."

"Was too." I whispered with difficulty. "He loves me."

"He is dead!" Robert stepped back, dropping me. My shoulders protested at the sudden weight as I fell. "And you were summoning a demon to replace him! No doubt in an attempt to gain our trust and leak information to the enemy!" He flicked the lash, scattering drops of my blood over the wall and floor. "We know you were at the LA institute." That caught my attention. "We asked around. We have an eyewitness who claims to have seen someone with your build and colour there the day the boy went missing."

"Doesn't prove anything." I stated petulantly. "M'not the only tall Asian guy in the world."

"You're the only one we know of with both ability and motive to do such a thing."

"Motive?"

"Demons always ask a price for their work. Always."

I was silent. My agonised brain couldn't talk my way out of that. Instead, I closed my eyes, hoping to God that I could pass out and escape the pain.

"Confess, and you will be dealt with swiftly and mercifully. Otherwise I will continue to visit until you do, or evidence enough arises to pass sentence. I will return tomorrow." With that, I heard his footsteps lead away from me, and the cell door clang shut. And then, finally, I passed into the sweet release of sleep.

True to his word, he did return. Day after day after day he came back, each time with a new tactic. I was flogged, burned, beaten and choked. My body was bruised and cut all over. My throat was raw from screaming, my wrists crusted with blood around my shackles. My skin felt hot and I was in a permanent state of dizziness and pain. My sanity wore away, the periods between sleep and torture nothing but long hours of aching, which was in some ways even worse. I was losing it. I could feel my mind screaming for it to stop, for me to get some kind of a reprise. And I wasn't just in pain. I was beyond hungry, too. I hadn't had anything to eat since this had begun. In all honesty, I was entirely ready to give in. It was only the thought of Alec that kept me going. Even so, I knew I was in bad shape. It didn't take a genius to figure out that I was delirious; I had a fever, my stomach was twisting in on itself and my head spun. At this rate, I wouldn't survive to see them pass a sentence. I needed to think of a way out, and quick.

My mind went back to my last conversation with Alec. He was in the demon realm... My father's homeland of Edom. I had no doubt about that. And I had no idea how he was going to get back. He'd have to pass through Pandemonium into the rift, unless...

I had a plan. It was reckless, and rested on so many variables, but it was the best I had. And I'd execute it as soon as I had the chance.

When Robert returned that day, I made a show of weakness. I didn't have to pretend much; I could barely stand as it was. I hung there, my wrists protesting and my shoulders practically locked in place, showing no sign of resistance like I had each time he'd come before.

"You awake, Bane?" His voice was gruff. My hand twitched.

"...I'm done." My voice was hoarse and barely above a whisper. Robert raised an eyebrow at me.

"I'm sorry?"

"I said I'm done. Take me to Jia. I'll tell her everything."

"She is Consul Penhallow to you." His tone was contemptuous, but there was light in his eyes. "You wish to confess?"

I nodded. "But only before the Council. Forgive me if I don't trust you to pass on the message accurately." Robert glared at me, but seemed to relent.

"Thank Raziel. I was beginning to think I'd never get through to you." He took a stele from his belt and drew an opening rune on my cuffs. I fell to the floor, clearly unable to support myself. When Robert attempted to pull me up again, my legs buckled beneath me, and I reached out to support myself, grabbing the nearest thing to me: the seraph blade at his hip. The sword cut open my palm and sliced my thumb as I grabbed at it, making me gasp in pain and let go, falling to the floor once again. It bled profusely. Face to the floor, I allowed myself a small smile before I was hauled to my feet once more. This time Robert held me up, and I leaned on him heavily as he walked me out of the city. I stumbled a few more times as we walked, and each time he pulled me up roughly, though he didn't once force me to walk by myself.

The journey seemed to take forever, and with my head already spinning I wondered more than once if I'd pass out on the way there. But I didn't. And when we left the Silent City the sunlight almost blinded me. The Council were there already, discussing matters of state as we entered. First a few, then all of those present saw us. There were gasps and mutterings at my state.

"Consul!" Robert's voice echoed through the hall. "The accused wishes to confess."

"Oh?" Jia stood, breaking off the discussion and watching me. Robert let go of me, and I fell to the floor. I pushed myself into a kneeling position with great effort. Flexing my sliced hand so the blood flowed freely, and holding everyone's attention with my eyes and my voice, I got to work.

"After Alec Lightwood's funeral, I returned to my apartment and summoned my father. I have only done this once before, as the price for doing so is often more than I can bear. But at this point I was practically suicidal. If it hadn't gone to plan, I still would have been happier than I was. So I did it. And I asked for Lucifer, demon of pride and guardian of souls to return Alec to this world." At this there were exclamations of surprise and horror. Behind my back, I pressed the fingers of one hand to the palm of the other, then back to the floor. "I won't lie that when he agreed to do so I was surprised. But of course it wouldn't be that easy. There was a price. There is always a price." I took a deep breath to steady myself, hoping beyond hope that this would succeed. My hand, no longer obscured, danced across the floor in front of me, and I said the words as I did so praying that the shock factor would be enough for them not to realise what I was doing. "He asked one thing. In order to redeem the soul of not only a person, but an angel-born, he asked for another. One equally as valuable, one, and I quote, 'whose time is in the distant future, untouched by demonic influence'." There was outcry. The Blackthorns yelled abuse, calling for my death. I didn't flinch. Instead, I completed the final line and began summoning the magic. It would take pretty much all the energy I had left, but with my hands no longer bound the magic could flow free.

Jia called for quiet, and though I could still feel the hate directed towards me, they no longer shouted at me. The Consul regarded me with a cold glare, but I could see under the ice that she was disbelieving, and felt betrayed.

"Magnus Bane, you have admitted to the kidnap and murder of a Shadowhunter child. You know the law. I have no choice but to sentence you to death. Do you have any last words?"

"Yes." With this, I let the magic go, reciting the words I knew so well. I substituted the names, and focused on myself, the only thing I had which was Alec's. The runes I had drawn in my own blood, runes of summoning and power but none of protection or containment, shone. Once again, the hall was a mess of noise and movement. Shadowhunters leapt to arms, pulling out seraph blades and running in my direction as black energy coalesced around me. The magic sapped my strength but I kept going, repeating the spell over and over until the energy formed a shape. The shape of a man, only black from head to toe, wielding two wicked barbs of blades. My vision blurred, and the last thing I saw before I blacked out was a pair of eyes, once blue but now deepest onyx, turned in my direction.


	18. Rescue

Alec POV

This place was beautiful. Alive and buzzing, very different to the dead, dusty hellscape I had come from. I had seen creatures unlike any in that realm, soft and harmless and timid. I was reminded of myself when I had first woken up. I realised how hungry I was, so I hunted a small animal and cooked it over a fire of my own conjuring, sharing it with Khirka as we explored the land. I had seen tall structures which were ordered and neat, rather than the chaotic spires I had seen before. It was altogether otherworldly, and evoked strange sensations in me: I felt as if I had not just seen this place before, but was familiar with it.

As we approached the gathering of structures, I saw intelligent creatures who walked upright and wore clothes, like I did. Khirka giggled.

"They look like you."

I frowned. "How come none of them are reacting to us?"

"They're blind. They see only things native to their own world. Only those who are demon touched and angelkin can see us here."

"What are these angelkin you keep talking about?"

Khirka hissed unpleasantly. "They act as guardians. They try to stop us from being here. They want us to stay in the desert forever."

"What do they look like?"

"They look like human folk, these things, only they are covered in black markings and they always, always have weapons. They kill us on sight."

"Oh..." Something stirred in me, and I looked around as if one of these creatures would jump out at me at any second. The fear followed me around, and I found myself checking over my shoulder every time I felt a slight prickle down my spine. Still I tried to enjoy myself. This lush world was thrumming with energy, and I could feel it filling me, making me feel more powerful and alert. We could explore without fear, thanks to the humans' blindness, and I had fun messing with all the things they surrounded themselves with. They really were strange creatures. I felt free and happy as we played, until later that day. I felt something, a sort of tugging from somewhere inside me. I looked to Khirka, but the green-skinned demon seemed to be fine.

"What is it?"

"I... I don't know..." It felt like it was getting stronger, pulling me in a direction I couldn't explain. My vision blurred a little, and I saw Khirka gasp. I looked down at myself, and saw that my body had changed. It looked... Incorporeal. More like smoke than flesh. I panicked, trying to find some way to literally pull myself back together, but I couldn't. The pull was too strong now, and I couldn't resist it. As my vision blurred once again, but didn't refocus, I felt myself let go and let the feeling take me.

The next thing I knew, I was somewhere completely different, and it was chaos. As soon as I had control over a physical body and magic, I summoned my blades to my hands. And then something else hit me: memories. Only pieces of them, but I recognised the people around me. People holding shining blades and advancing towards me. Angelkin. A thrill of fear went through me.

I glanced behind me and there, sprawled on the floor was a man. A beautiful, mortally wounded man whose image tugged at my insides in entirely different ways. And he was surrounded by bloody runes, making it obvious that he was the one who summoned me, and consequently that it was my duty to protect him. As his eyes, gold-green and slit-pupilled met mine for a split second before he went limp, I felt a fierce, all-consuming desire to save him. To get him out of here and heal him. And so I turned back to my attackers and prepared for a fight.

Instinct told me what to do. I was on defence: incapacitate, don't kill, protect before attacking at all costs. Muscle memory. With swords alone I would have been taken down in minutes. However those I could not engage in combat I sent spells at, and they fell, stunned or paralysed. One bypassed me, running straight past in an attempt to kill my charge, and I threw a wave of energy at them, throwing them across the room. It took energy from me at an alarming rate, but this place was so thrumming with the stuff that it didn't take me long to replenish it.

As soon as there was a break in the attack as my opponents picked themselves up or tried to staunch any wounds I had made, I turned, scooped the man lying unconscious on the floor up into my arms, and ran for the first exit I saw. I knew they would be right behind me, so I ran as fast as I could with someone in my arms. I was strong, but I could still feel the strain as I moved, putting pressure on my lungs and making me lightheaded. I ran past buildings, down winding, narrow streets, hoping that if I kept going in one direction as best as I could, I'd find the edge of the city eventually. Sure enough, a wall loomed in front of me, topped by a massive, clear spire, signifying the edge of the city. Carefully positioning my sleeping companion over my shoulder, I began to scale the wall. It wasn't too difficult; the rough bricks made plenty of foot and handholds. However when I reached the top and made to climb over, I was met by an unseen, solid force that sent a nasty shock through me. I bit back a cry, and stopped, perching on the top of the wall, trying to figure out how to move forwards. I couldn't see the thing which was stopping me, which made figuring out how to bypass it difficult. I stopped to think. It was clearly a magical ward, but I didn't know how to remove it.

It was in the midst of the concentration that more memories resurfaced. I remembered this city, I remembered walking through those streets, and most importantly, I remembered... "Demon blood..."

I pressed my fingertip to the spine curving from the base of my blade, watching the ichor run from the pinprick. Then I went to the base of the tower, and wiped the black liquid over the clear substance in front of me. I hissed in pain as it burned my skin, but kept at it. Nothing seemed to happen, but when I reached out to where the barrier was again, I met no resistance. Smiling a little to myself, I jumped down from the wall. The impact jammed my knees for a second, but only a second, and then I was running again, away from the city.

I could see a lake in the distance, so I ran towards that. Water would be welcome to clean off the blood and to drink.

It wasn't until I was sure we had gone far enough to discourage my pursuers from chasing, and found a spot on the shore of the lake suitably surrounded by trees and bushes for cover that I dared stop. Recovering my strength, I laid down the man I was carrying on the grass and knelt beside him. His eyes moved restlessly under dark lids, and he was hot to the touch. His chest was marred by cuts and bruises were faintly visible on the caramel colour of his skin. I had no idea where to even start, but I figured an attempt to clean his wounds and cool him down would at least help a little. Ripping some fabric from his jeans- them being the only available material suitable for the job- I soaked it in water and began gently cleaning the blood and sweat from his body. He moaned a little in response, and I wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing. Still, I kept going, making sure each wound was tended to individually, not missing a thing. When I turned him over to get to his back, I gasped at the mess of vicious cuts that marred his skin, some semi-healed, most open and oozing liquid which wasn't entirely blood. He made more displeased noises when I set about cleaning that mess, and arched slightly away from me. I mumbled an apology under my breath, though I knew he couldn't hear me. When I was done, I examined him again. It was obvious his wounds were infected, and he'd need to be healed. But... I wasn't sure I could do that. I knew the magic existed, but my magic was purely destructive, or at least it had seemed that way so far. I could kill or injure, but not heal. Unless... Maybe I could kill whatever was causing the infection.

I laid my hands gently over his wounds, and closed my eyes. I could feel his life energy, and though I wanted to take it I wouldn't, as that would be disastrous for him in this state. Instead I looked deeper, and found a river of nasty things in his bloodstream. No wonder he looked so sick. Concentrating my power, I focused the magic on the infection, and released it. Since the things were so tiny, I could kill them with no problems whatsoever. I opened my eyes again, and couldn't help but be disappointed when there was no immediate effect. But, I reassured myself, it would take at least a good few hours for the symptoms to clear, if not a day or two. As long as there was no turn for the worse, he'd probably be fine. I got him to drink by soaking the fabric in water (after having cleaned it thoroughly) and using it to drip water onto his lips. When I felt he'd drunk enough, I lay the fabric over his forehead, which I thought might help cool him down. I ended up pulling him into my lap, propping his head up in the crook of my arm to try and make him comfortable. That and being in contact with him made me feel better somehow. I looked down at his face. His eyes were no longer moving under his eyelids, which made him look more peaceful. His chin and upper lip were dark with days-old stubble, and his hair was long and greasy with sweat, sticking to his face. One eye was ringed by a dark bruise, and his lip was split and cracked. He was... Gorgeous. I leaned down and pressed my lips to his forehead, kissing him softly. "I'll make sure you get better, Magnus." I whispered to him, then did a double take. Magnus...? Where had that come from? Was that his name? Yes, I thought. I recognise that name, even if it does feel a little strange on my tongue.

When night fell, I was still holding Magnus, watching intently for any sign of him waking. His fever appeared to have lessened, and he slept soundly. Every now and then I used my magic to check him, clearing any potential new infections and giving his wounds a chance to heal properly. Some of the cuts still bled a little, but not badly enough for me to worry. I didn't dare sleep, in case he got worse again. Besides, I wasn't overly tired. I could keep going a bit longer.

I found myself wondering about Khirka. I had suddenly disappeared in front of the demon, and if it was them who had disappeared in front of me I'd be very confused and a little worried. I wondered if I'd ever see them again. I had no idea where we had been before, or where this place was in relation to that. I missed my new friend, as strange as they might have been.

It must have been the early hours of the morning when he began to stir; the sky had just begun to light up once more, and the air was filling with chirping song. Magnus rolled onto his side, burying his face in the space between my arm and my torso, and made a contented noise. I watched him in anticipation, wondering if he would wake up. Sure enough, the one eye I could see flickered open, and the slit pupil narrowed as it focused on me. He tried to speak, but couldn't, so he cleared his throat and tried again.

"Alec...?" I blinked. Alec... Was that me? I think so. It seemed right, the same way Magnus's name had. Nodding, I spoke.

"I'm glad you're okay. I was worried you wouldn't wake up. I tried to heal you but I don't know if I can do that yet." Magnus's eyes widened and he stared at me for a second, before seeming to get himself under control again. I frowned, confused at his reaction.

"Woah, woah, slow down. I don't understand what you're saying." His words were a lot softer than the ones I was using, but I still understood them perfectly.

"Um..." I repeated the same thing again, only much slower. Magnus watched me, looking fascinated. When I was done, he nodded.

"Okay. Alec... When did you learn Purgatic?" That confused me even more. Stopping to think, I realised what was happening and switched to the language he was using, which somehow I knew despite it not being my native language.

"Sorry. Since I woke up I haven't been able to remember much." Magnus blinked, but seemed to file that exchange away for later.

"Okay. Where are we? Last I remember I was about to be executed in the Council chamber."

"We've left the city. We're on the shore of the nearby lake."

"The Mirror... Alec?"

"Mm?"

"You wouldn't happen to have anything to eat, would you?"

"No..."

"Oh..." His face twisted. "I'm painfully hungry, and I can't heal myself with this little energy."

I frowned for a moment, then suggested, "Could you use some of mine?"

"I suppose so, yes... But I will have to eat at some point before I waste away." I nodded, and held out my hand for him. He took it, his grip weak in mine, and closed his eyes. "I've never used a demon's energy before. I wonder if it'll be different..." And then I felt a wave of tiredness settle over me as my energy was transferred to him. He took a lot, but I didn't mind. He needed it more than I did right now. When he was done, he sat up, looking a lot more alert. Closing his eyes, he placed his hand over each of his injuries in turn, and I watched, somewhat in awe, as the wounds closed and the bruises faded. When it came to his back, he turned to me. "I'm going to need you to help me. Just hold my hand and place your other hand over the wounds. I'm going to channel the magic through you, and if you could maybe add some of your strength to mine it would help. Otherwise it'd probably be quite ugly." I frowned a little, but nodded, doing as he said. His hand was warm and slightly damp with sweat from his ordeals. I made sure to not put any pressure on his back as he began the spell, and when I felt the magic flow through me I added mine to enhance the spell. I could feel the strain it put on him already; even with my strength he was still struggling. He'd need food and proper rest as soon as possible to recover. Second-hand energy could only get him so far. The hideously deep cuts which lacerated his back knitted themselves together as I watched, and Magnus shivered slightly as though it were an unpleasant feeling. When he cut off the spell, there was no sign of exposed flesh or muscle, and the only blood was the smudges already on his skin. However the marks were not completely gone; the shallowest left thin scars, several shades lighter than the skin around them. The worst were ridges which even now didn't look completely healed, and I got the feeling they never would. But over time they would fade, and it wasn't as if they made him any less beautiful to me.

"We have to go." He broke the silence bluntly. I frowned.

"But, Magnus... You're not well."

"I'm well enough. The longer we stay here the more likely they are to find us. I'm sure they're looking for me."

I didn't want him to strain himself, but he was right. We needed to move.

When I stood and pulled Magnus to his feet, letting him lean on me, I noticed that the grass and small plants around where we sat were withered. I felt a little guilty, as I knew it was because I had drained the natural energy around me to heal Magnus and recover my strength. I'd have to be careful when using large amounts of magic, so that I don't use too much of the energy from animals and plants around me.

"So where should we go?"

"Firstly, we need to go back to my apartment. They'll have it under watch very soon, and there are important artefacts and... other things I don't want to lose."

"Okay..."

I closed my eyes and let a memory fill my head; a memory of the place that cropped up most often when I thought of Magnus. I saw the dark apartment in my mind's eye, and waved my hand, opening a portal to the place in my head. Opening my eyes, I stepped through it, ignoring the rush of dizziness the world shifted around me.

I didn't notice Magnus staring at me disbelievingly as he followed me through.


	19. Outlaw

Magnus POV

The apartment looked exactly as we'd left it. It was strange, thinking of all that had happened between now and the last time I'd been here. Alec wasn't the same, I could tell that much. It felt like not only were parts of him missing, but new parts had been added during his time in Edom. I was sure that was where he had been. The hope I was clinging to was that he seemed to be recovering. Every now and then he'd stop with a strange look on his face, and I'd know he'd recalled a memory from somewhere. And he still seemed to be Alec when it really mattered; he cared for me, even if he didn't understand why.

Although I could deduce this much, there was still a lot I didn't understand. I wanted to know what was going on in his head. How he suddenly knew a demon language and how to use his magic so expertly now, when he'd only just grasped the basics before. I wondered- feared, really- that Lucifer had done more than just change his body. And I was scared of how that would manifest itself, in the end. Who knew how strong this new part of him would become, in time?

But for right now,I didn't have time for that. I knew this was the first place the Shadowhunters would look for me. But there were a few things I did not want them to get their hands on. And there were others that I required myself, for… personal reasons. I needed to retrieve them, before my apartment was inevitably ransacked for 'evidence'. And so here we were, having just tumbled dizzyingly through a portal that was not of my own making. My physical sickness made it all so much worse, even if I had the energy to stand. After this, we'd go somewhere to eat.

"Right. We need to be in and out as soon as possible. We probably have very little time before they pick up on your energy and rush over here. You get us some clothes. Practical ones, that won't draw attention." As much as I loved my flashy outfits, now was not the time. I could always restock my wardrobe. "I'll go pick up my things."

"What kind of things?" Alec asked. "I could help you look."

I went over the list in my head. No, I could do without having to go through it all. "Just focus on the essentials. I know what I'm doing."

Something flickered in his eyes, and I had bad flashbacks as to why it had all gone so badly before this whole fiasco started. I winced inwardly. "I can look on my own, and I'll show you once we're safe, if you really want to know." I hoped that would pacify him for now, at least.

"Fine. Let's go."

I unlocked the door with a wave of my hand and we went in, splitting up immediately. I was relieved when I didn't have to point out where we kept our clothes; it meant he remembered something more. Either that or he just had a decent amount of common sense. I hoped it was the former. Meanwhile, I went to my study. Rifling through books and papers, I found a suitable bag and began filling it with the important stuff. Some of my more risqué spell books, my athame, a few other priceless artefacts. I left the snuffbox Woolsey Scott gave me, as I didn't want to stir up any more jealousy, and was careful to pick up any little gifts or precious memories Alec had given me. Finally, I found a small, unassuming chest in the back of my cupboard, de-warded and unlocked it with a few spells, and drew out a notebook. I buried it as deep in my bag as I could. I then left my study and did a quick check around the rest of the apartment, making sure I hadn't left any incriminating evidence around. No that they really needed it; I'd already given a full confession.

Alec came out with a sports bag presumably stuffed with clothes and possibly a few weapons, judging by some of the shapes pressing outwards from within.

"Got everything?" I nodded, and we left.

Rather than risk using any more large quantities of energy, Alec insisted upon going on foot, and only teleporting in a crisis. I reluctantly agreed, though only because I didn't have the energy to make one myself. We used back roads, avoiding contact with other people where possible. Alec put up a glamour to disguise our strange looks, but the difficulty of travelling, invisible, through crowds on the street was an unappealing idea.

We were in an alley, dark and empty, when I felt a prickle down my back. I turned, my eyes flashing in the low light, but didn't see anything. I kept quiet, listening carefully. Even in the almost silence, I didn't hear them. All of a sudden, there was a glowing white blade at my throat and an arm around my chest. I tried to cry out, to give Alec a warning, but it was already too late. Another had dropped from the roof behind us, and the element of surprise gave them a chance to take him down before he could react. I saw a black-clad figure sat firmly on Alec's back, twisting his arm behind him and holding a blade to the back of his head. Another appeared from the shadows in front of me, red glimmering at her throat and dark eyes shining malice. But then she stopped.

"Wait!" She called out. I felt the pressure on my throat lessen, though the one holding me did not let go. "…Magnus?" Isabelle whispered. I nodded. I understood why she didn't recognise me- I was in rags, dirt, blood and makeup smudging my face and making it unrecognisable. My hair was long, loose and messy. I really was not myself. It was the eyes that gave it away. As for Alec, he was wearing demon armour plating, and he had never looked so pale, with such dark eyes. At this, the arm around me let go, though the person holding the blade- Jace, I saw, as he walked around to my front- did not lower it. The other- Clary- let go of Alec's arm. He hissed slightly, twisting it back into a comfortable position. At a motion from Jace, she frowned a little and pressed the tip of the blade to Alec's skull.

"Hey… What's with the hostility? It's us." I tried to reassure her.

"We can't be certain you're harmless." Jace stated bluntly. "We heard the news."

"Magnus, how could you?!" Isabelle wailed. I could see the sense of duty battling with care in her eyes. She cared about me. How sweet.

I caught Alec's eye. He gave me a questioning look. I pointedly ignored it.

"Isabelle, darling. I don't know if you noticed but I couldn't so much as summon a weapon right now, let alone cast any dangerous spells. As for Alec, he's as much himself as he's ever been," okay, that was a lie, "and he definitely won't harm any of you. Right, love?"

Alec frowned at me, but nodded.

"Now I don't know exactly what you've been told, but I can assure you I pose no threat. You know me. Are you going to believe what your superiors tell you or are you going to trust your instincts?"

Jace looked at Isabelle, then back at me. I could see even he was struggling with the decision. I just had to hope they trusted me well enough to believe me. And it was mostly truth. "We don't have much time. If anyone else finds us, we're dead. And me, I won't come back. So please. Trust me."

There was a moment of silence, and then Isabelle motioned for Jace to lower his weapon. With slight hesitation, he did. Clary followed suit, getting off Alec and helping him to his feet. She seemed unsettled when she caught his eyes, but didn't comment.

"Alright. Go. Just…" She made a vague motion. "Don't do anything dumb, okay?"

I gave her a little smirk and nodded. Alec took my hand and we headed off. I knew they were watching us as we walked away, but I didn't look back. Alec was staring determinedly at the ground, expression stony. I went over what had just happened, trying to piece together what he knew. As far as I could tell, he'd think I'd lied to the Clave about… something, though he didn't know what they'd accused me of. I was getting dangerously close to having to come clean. I did not relish that prospect. Yet I knew I couldn't keep it a secret forever. I'd tell him. Eventually.

"Alec… I know you don't want to, but we need to get far away from here. You remember our holiday? Where we went in India? I think we should go back there."

His face crinkled in confusion, struggling to recall the memory.

"Do you think you can get us back there?"

"I… I don't know. I can't remember it." His voice was quiet. I wondered if there was anything I could do to piece him back together. There must be some kind of ritual I could do. I recalled the drama with Lilith, and how Sebastian had re-bound her after her death, saving her years of recovery between dimensions. Alec wasn't as bad as that, but he'd still been affected, and I didn't know if it was just memories he was missing.

"Alright. Uh… If you can somehow channel the magic through me I can get us there." I pictured the location in my head and focused the energy I could feel Alec releasing. It was much like the energy transfer earlier, except I didn't get to keep any of it. The portal opened, and we stepped through.

I had put us down in the hotel we'd stayed at, in the lobby. The air was warm and thick and smelled of spices, and a few others milled around. All were Downworlders- I couldn't risk us showing up in the middle of a crowded street.

"Magnus?" I looked in the direction of the voice. The receptionist, who had been kind enough to offer the best rooms at a discount rate the last time we were here- looked over me with a stunned expression. I gave her my best sheepish smile. "You look awful! What happened?"

"Long story. Are you still offering those rooms?"

"For you, honey, always."

I smiled at her. "Thanks sweet pea."

She turned to the box where she kept the keys. Her wings- huge, tawny things that swept the floor as she moved- brushed a paper off her desk. I picked it up for her.

"Thanks. Here." She handed me the room key, and her glance swept over Alec. "Your boyfriend looks different from the last time you were here. Are those contacts?"

"Nope. Like I said. Long story. Maybe I'll tell you some time." I took the key. "See you around."

Once in the quiet, away from everyone else, I felt I could finally relax a bit. I was fairly confident no one would follow us here. Even if they did, this place was specifically run by Downworlders. We had protocols for that kind of thing.

Alec placed his bag carefully in a corner, and I started to empty out mine. The spell books I placed to one side, since I hopefully wouldn't bending those any time soon. Alec began to leaf through them, looking curious. I didn't stop him.

"Hey, these are pretty difficult spells."

"I know."

"Where did you get these books?"

"I'm a bit of collector, if you will. A lot of that I'm not technically supposed to have, and I don't really want your friends adding those to my list of reasons to not like me." He gave me a weird look when I said 'your friends'.

"What else have you got in there?"

"Oh, mostly priceless artefacts collected over the past few centuries." He picked up an ancient-looking amulet. "I wouldn't touch that if I were you. There's some nasty stuff sealed in it." He put it back down quickly.

The only thing I didn't take out was the notebook. That wasn't ready to be shown yet. Though when I'd be able to continue it again I didn't know. But now we had a safe space, at least for a while, and we could rest and recuperate. The room was the best in the hotel, draped with rich silks and decorated with gorgeous carvings and paintings. The table I had now covered with the contents of my bag was made of rich brown wood, and, naturally, there was a very inviting, very large bed. I felt a smirk touch my lips as I remembered just what had gone on in that bed the last time we were here. I supposed the reason the lady at the desk was so generous was down to the favours she owed me- it was extremely useful, having friends all over the world, so I made sure to familiarise myself with the locals whenever I traveled. They almost never forgot me. I'm a hard person to forget.

I figured the first item on the agenda was food. Fortunately, they served a very varied menu on room service here, so getting that wouldn't be an issue. I picked up the menu and the phone, and prepared to call. "Alec, love, do you want anything?" He looked over at the menu, scanning it quickly.

"Um, just something light. And a coffee." I rang the number, asking for a dish of spiced salmon, a plate of dhokla and a coffee for Alec, and a large glass of fresh mango juice. I had always loved the sweetness of that stuff.

As I ate, Alec continued to go through the bits and pieces on the table. He picked up a delicate wood carving of a cat, turning it over in his hands.

"You made that." I told him. He looked up at me, surprised.

"I did?"

"Yeah. You gave it to me for our six month anniversary. I remember you had a bandage around your finger where you'd slipped and cut yourself, but you were very proud of it. I was too. That was the first time I saw your more creative side." I smiled a little sadly. "It's supposed to be my cat, Chairman Meow. I suppose he's found somewhere safe to stay, away from our apartment. I hope Catarina has the good sense to take care of him for me."

"Oh." Alec sounded sad, as though he were disappointed in himself for not remembering.

"Don't worry, love. This won't last forever." He looked up at me, and though his expression was plain and familiar, easy for me to read, his black eyes were unknown and expressionless. I missed his blue ones. They were one of my favourite things about him, appearance wise anyway. "In fact…" I pushed my plate away, having eaten as much as my starved stomach could handle, and pulled one of the spell books towards me. I began to leaf through, finding the section on summoning. These spells were nowhere near on the scale of the one I used to summon my father, but they were still powerful enough to summon a less powerful Greater Demon. And yet they were not quite what I was looking for…

"Aha!" The book fell open on the table. The page it was open on happened to have a rather graphic image of a demon being killed by a figure with a glowing sword- presumably a Shadowhunter. It detailed how a demon was affected by death in a world that was not its own. Alec read it aloud.

"Demons are bound to the magic of their home dimension, and as such their own energy cannot return to the earth when its body is destroyed in another. Rather than returning to the natural balance of the world, it is scattered between dimensions, often lost for many centuries until the demon recovers enough power to heal itself.

"Where it may take many lifetimes for the demon on its own, if another is willing, the demon's energies can be recovered and bound together once more using the other's magic. However, this magic must be demonic in origin."

"That won't be a problem." I began skimming over the spell. Alec continued.

If any part of the demon can be summoned or held, the summoner can then use their energy to draw in and seal the rest of it within its body. This spell should not be taken lightly, as a demon at full strength is dangerous and unpredictable. Only those practiced in the arts of magic and containment of dark energies should seek to attempt this."

"I trust you to not hurt me. Besides, I am practiced in both those things."

Alec glanced at me. "You don't need to justify this, you know? I want my memories back as much as you do."

"…Fair enough. I promise that as soon as I have recovered my strength, I'll have you back to normal." He nodded. "For now though, I think I need a shower and a good night's sleep."


	20. Complete

Alec POV

I continued to go over each item on the table in front of me. Magnus had told me that several of these things were items that meant a lot to him because they were memories of the two of us. He advised that maybe I could remember more using them as triggers. So far it wasn't working. I sighed, listening to the sound of running water through the wall. It sounded like Magnus was singing softly to himself. I felt a small smile cross my face. Even if I couldn't recall much of my past with him, I could completely understand why I was with him. I didn't need memories for that.

A few minutes later he came back, a towel around his waist and hair dripping.

"Any luck?" I shook my head. I caught a brief expression of disappointment on his features, but it didn't linger. "No matter. I'm sure we can fix you up easily. Your turn."

I got up from my seated went to the bathroom. I wasn't as bad as Magnus, but I had my fair share of dust, dirt and blood to wash off. As I walked past him, he grabbed my wrist and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. I smiled softly, feeling a slight hint of a blush.

"Don't take long."

I nodded. "I won't."

The bathroom was just as nice as the bedroom, with a large, modern-looking shower. On one wall was a gilded gold mirror, which I caught my reflection in as I entered. It startled me; I looked so out of place. I was still wearing the demon metal armour and whilst it had been practical and unremarkable in my home dimension, it was in stark contrast to the soft domesticity of the room around me. Unwrapping the ragged makeshift belt I had on and placing my dual swords carefully aside, I took off the armour. It clattered as it hit the tiled floor. The tunic underneath was a completely different matter. It was close fitting, and I couldn't see any conceivable way to get it off. It was a magical garment, so… I pulled at it and sure enough, it came away as easily as it went on. I wondered where such a thing could have come from, and how it ended up in the Hoarder's cave. It must have been created by a talented magic user. I'd keep it safe.

The black hide was folded and placed next to the armour, leaving nothing but my pale skin and streaks of dirt. Apart from a scar on the back of my hand and a few scattered cuts on what had been exposed during the fight with the Angelkin, I was unmarked. Something seemed wrong about that. I shrugged it off, grateful I didn't have any worse injuries and got in the shower. The water started cold but quickly warmed up, and I scrubbed the filth from my skin. It felt good to get it off. A bottle of something that smelled good, like spiced fruit, tinged with something chemical, sat on the side. I poured some on my hand and rubbed it into my skin, liking the smooth lather it created. The water ran over my face and into my eyes, but I didn't mind. The warmth was very pleasant. When I was finished, I shut off the water and reached for the fluffy white towel that was hung on a rack nearby. I dried myself off quickly and wrapped it around my waist as Magnus had, Returning to the room, I found him sat up in the bed scribbling something in a slightly beat up notebook. When he heard me coming he stopped, putting it in the drawer beside his bed.

"What's that?"

"Oh. It's nothing important. Just a few reminders for stuff I'll need to do once this mess has been sorted out."

"Okay."

I draped my towel over where Magnus had left his; over a chair in the corner of the room, and joined him in the bed. He smirked at me a little as he watched me do so.

"What?"

"Oh, I just thought I might have to talk you out of wearing clothes, since I don't know how much of our relationship you remember. I'm glad I don't."

I frowned slightly. "Why would I need to be talked out of wearing clothes in bed?"

"Oh, never mind. I thought you might be self conscious, is all."

That didn't clear anything up, but I let it pass. Maybe it made more sense if you knew me longer.

…That wasn't a comforting thought.

Instead of dwelling on not knowing my own past, I decided to focus on what was right in front of me. Magnus looked a lot healthier already, the cuts and bruises healing nicely with a kickstart from his magic, his face cleaner and less drained, even if still tired. He kissed me softly and I felt his stubble scratch my face, not in an unpleasant way. It made me feel warm inside, irrationally happy. I sighed contentedly and settled in beside him. The pillow was wet where he'd been leaning on it. I didn't mind- my own wet hair would have just accomplished the same thing. His skin was warm against mine. I rested my head on his shoulder, his arm around me, our legs tangled together. There was still a soft light coming through the curtains, but I knew he must be exhausted, and I could do with some rest myself. My eyes fell upon a thin scar that ran down his neck and all the way across his chest. I remembered that, not too long ago, that had been open and weeping blood, deep and painful. I suppressed a bubble of anger, instead running my finger down the thin line. He made a faint noise of amusement.

"Tickles."

"Sorry." I stopped, resting my hand on his chest.

"I don't mind. S'nice…" He mumbled, voice thick with tiredness. Now that we were finally in a calm, quiet, comfortable setting, his exhaustion seemed to have hit him like a bus. I kissed his collarbone.

"Night, Magnus."

"Night night angel…" His reply caught me off guard, but I didn't respond. I was certainly not any kind of angel.

It didn't take long for his breathing to slow, threatening to become a snore. I smiled softly into his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Closing my eyes, I let my own consciousness drift.

I woke before Magnus did. In fact, it was him that woke me up. At some point during the night I had rolled over and away from him. He lay on his front, head resting on his arms, but his hands clutched at the pillow unconsciously. I could see the band of shiny, new skin around his wrists where they had almost healed as he did so. He made a small noise of discomfort, burying his face in the pillow, and he rolled onto his side, back facing me, curling up slightly. I wondered if he was having a nightmare, and if so, what I should do. Wake him up? He needed as much rest as he could get… Would it be better to just wait for it to pass? Another almost imperceptible whimper seemed to answer that question. Instead of doing either, I just placed a hand on his arm gently. He seemed to start, but didn't wake. I moved closer, putting my arm around his waist and nuzzling his neck softly. He felt tense as I pressed my body to his, even shaking a little.

"Magnus… I whispered softly, barely doing more than mouthing the words. "You're safe… You're with me…" I felt his restless hand grasp mine, and I let him hold it. Eventually, I felt the shaking stop, and his breathing relaxed back into a normal pattern. I didn't move, though. Even when I got pins and needles in the other arm, which I was lying on top of somewhat awkwardly, I stayed there, ready to comfort him should the nightmare return.

It must have been a couple hours later when he finally woke up. I didn't begrudge him; he needed a good night's sleep, and I had my own thoughts to occupy me in the meantime. When he began to stir, I snapped back reality and kissed the back of his neck. He rolled over to face me, and I- more than a little gratefully- sat up in bed, freeing my arm. It tingled uncomfortably.

"Morning."

He blinked sleepily, looking up at looked more like a cat than ever like this. It was very endearing. I smiled at him.

'Mning…" He closed his eyes again, nestling into me. I laughed softly as I noticed the way his hair was sticking out in all directions, a big, fluffy mess. "What?"

"Your hair." He put a hand up to touch it, and huffed when he felt it sticking up uncontrollably. I laughed again. "Shut up."

"It's cute."

"Sure, to you maybe. But I don't have bad hair days."

"I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Mmm." He pushed himself up to sit beside me. I kissed his cheek, and he responded by holding my face in his hand and kissing me full on the lips. I responded enthusiastically, running my hand over his chest to rest at the nape of his neck, playing with the fine hair there. He gasped a little into the kiss. We must have stayed like that for a good half minute at least before he broke off. By this point both of us were a little flushed, and I would have initiated something more if he didn't move away. I made a small noise in protest, and he smiled a little, taking my hand in his and kissing my knuckles.

"Sorry, love, but I think there are more important things to be doing right now."

"Like what?" I asked a touch indignantly.

"Like fixing your memory." That caught my attention.

"You want to try that already?"

"Well, I want to do it as soon as possible because I know it's bothering you, and it's bothering me too. I mean… I can tell you're different."

"Oh…" My eyes flickered downward a little.

"Not that I don't love you right now; I always do. But… There are small things that are catching me off guard, and I think we'd both rather you were back to normal."

"Yeah… I guess you're right." I felt a touch downcast. I didn't exactly know why- he was entirely right, I knew there were parts of me missing. Not just my memory, but little habits and personality traits that gave themselves away in how I acted differently to how Magnus expected me to. I did feel slightly like a shell of myself.

"I promise you I'll make it up to you once this is done. And you'll be grateful I did."

"Okay." I conceded, deciding he was probably correct. "We have just woken up though. Do you really want to get started right now?"

"You know me. Once I've decided on something I won't rest until I've followed it through."

I gave him a look, which he responded to by smiling apologetically. "Right. You probably don't. Sorry. But that's only proof why we should start as soon as possible!"

I sighed a little, then nodded. "Alright. I suppose I should get dressed then." I got up, reluctantly leaving the warm softness of the bed behind, and went to the bag still in the corner of the room, stuffed with clothes. I had taken the most practical stuff I could find. In my case, that was easy; most of my wardrobe consisted of loose fitting, flexible and dark-coloured clothing. However Magnus's was more difficult. I had managed to scavenge a few comfortable, semi-plain shirts without too many inconvenient straps, buckles, tassels et cetera, and the most loose fitting jeans I could find. I had also found two pairs of black, combat-style boots which were pretty much perfect. One pair had a few spiked studs on the heels and toes, but I figured that might be advantageous in a fight. I pulled on an outfit as Magnus sorted through what I'd brought. He sighed as he pulled out an assortment of shirts, trying to find one to match the black, only minimally sequinned jeans he'd picked out.

"Oh Alec. I see your fashion sense hasn't changed." He stated fondly, picking out what he deemed the least offensive combination.

"Hey, we were on a time limit, okay? And you said yourself that fashion isn't a priority."

"That doesn't mean it's not important."

I rolled my eyes, suppressing a grin as he got dressed.

Once we were ready, he picked up the spell book he'd left on the table. Flicking to the correct page, he began skimming over the instructions, muttering them to himself as he figured out what we'd need.

"Right. Obviously we need a pentagram. All summoning rituals require one of those. Because it's you, I don't think we need to bother with cleansing or protection rituals."

"Are you sure? What if something goes wrong?"

"Like what? I'm not going to be summoning any other demons. If it doesn't work it doesn't work, that's that."

"Well, if you're sure."

He picked up his athame from the table where he'd set it the night before. "It also says a blood offering is required. I think I'll have to provide that. We can't use yours for obvious reasons."

I walked over to him, putting my arms around him from behind. "Is that really necessary?I don't want you hurting yourself again."

"It's fine. I won't miss a few more drops of blood."

I sighed, but knew it was true. "So where should we do this? We can't do it here, can we?"

"No, but this is a Downworlder hotel, so they probably have a space for rituals and such somewhere nearby."

"Really? They have that?"

"Yeah. You'd be surprised how often warlocks need safe space away from home to do that kind of thing. Mostly because of Shadowhunter law."

I blinked. "Shadowhunters?"

Magnus turned to face me, shock evident in his expression.

"You don't remember anything about Shadowhunters? At all?" I shook my head sombrely. "They… You were… Oh never mind. Once this is done you should remember." He seemed to have given up. I bit my lip, feeling more than a little inadequate. Best we get this done and over with as soon as possible.

It turned out Magnus was right. We spoke to the receptionist, Naho, I found out her name was, and she pointed us in the direction of a hall within the hotel that was available for use. Fortunately, she didn't ask questions. I figured she didn't want to know- the less said the better and all that. I did wonder about the convenience of it all. Did this kind of thing happen a lot? Did warlocks really summon demons that often? I asked Magnus, and he responded by explaining that no, they didn't, but unless Shadowhunters were directly involved they tended to condemn the use of 'dark magic' including the summoning and binding of demons, and this led to it becoming a sort of underground business. Consequently, Downworlders built this sort of place, where they can stay and do as they please without fear of prosecution. Even if they weren't used all the time, they were in demand enough to be built and run in several locations throughout the world. The whole 'unless Shadowhunters are involved' part seemed more than a little hypocritical to me. Apparently everyone else agreed, but no one had the power or the guts to argue. Well, I wasn't sure about any of this, but I was sure that if Downworlders were really as common as they seemed to be, they must be able to do something about it.

Setup was easy. Since Magnus seemed so confident with the whole thing, we didn't spend any time setting up protective traps and wards, or even drawing runes of protection around the pentagram. I still thought it might be a little reckless, but I just had to trust both in Magnus and in myself. As long as I held my self control together, we should be fine.

I could do this.

So I stood in the centre of the pentagram, drawn in chalk, and watched as Magnus pressed a blade gently to the inside of his wrist, drawing just enough blood to fuel the ritual, then healed the cut over with a muttered spell. He dropped the red liquid within the bounds of the pentagram, where it joined several other bloodstains on the floorboards. It was slightly unnerving. Holding the spell book at arms' length, he began to chant.

I felt his words resonate through me, causing much the same sensation as when he'd summoned me before, only this time my world wasn't spinning and I wasn't being pulled anywhere; it was more like I had my own gravitational pull, that was drawing in invisible energy around me. Occasionally that energy would shimmer into existence, a strange substance like cords of smoke, sometimes whitish silver, sometimes an ethereal black, as though it was absorbing the light around it. Occasionally I'd catch a glimpse of the two colours blended together, creating any number of greys in the air. I reached out towards them, and they seemed to be drawn to me, clinging to my fingertips and settling on my skin. My mind reeled. I felt the energy surging where the substance touched me. It was an immensely strange feeling, hot and electric. And with it…With it came memories. Lots of them, and strong ones too. I closed my eyes. Without being able to see the energy, I couldn't precisely place where it was touching me. Besides, my mind was preoccupied with thoughts flowing through my head like a movie, they were so clear.

I didn't know how long I stood there. I wasn't paying attention to the passage of time. But eventually it stopped, and I could focus. Immediately I knew I was better. I felt whole. Normal. Even… More than that. I didn't just have my original self; I had the knowledge and the power Lucifer had bestowed on me when he gave me this new body. I finally understood it, and I could use it too. I opened my eyes, feeling a smile on my lips as I saw Magnus in front of me, watching me curiously. We made eye contact and his expression was full of happiness and relief.

"Alec…" He breathed. "Your eyes are blue again."

 


	21. Guilt

Isabelle POV

The evening after my encounter with Magnus and Alec I found it very difficult to concentrate on anything else. I sat with Simon on the sofa at his place. Jordan was out on official Praetor business, so it was just the two of us. He'd finally persuaded me to watch something he'd been bugging me about for ages- some ridiculously long movie which had something to do with a ring and a species of short people with strangely hairy feet. It might have been good, but I was too lost in my own thoughts to properly pay attention.

"Hey…" Simon waved his hand in front of my face and I blinked, looking up at him from where I was leaning on his shoulder. "I can turn it off if you're not interested…" I could see the disappointment in his face, and I sighed.

"It's not the movie." He reached for the remote and paused it.

"It's Alec, isn't it?"

Simon knew about him, knew that somehow Magnus had brought him back as a demon, but he hadn't seen him yet. He'd only heard it second hand. And now this whole fiasco with the Clave had made him very skeptical.

"Yes. I saw him earlier."

His eyes widened. "You did?"

"Yeah."

"I thought Magnus was locked up. And Alec was in some demon dimension."

"So did I. But then we got an emergency fire message from Idris saying that they were on the run. Magnus apparently confessed to the murder of Tiberius Blackthorn and summoned 'a demon' to escape. It was pretty obvious which one. There were casualties. No fatalities, but still…

"He's been labelled rogue and we have orders to kill both of them on sight." I gave him a second to take this in. He opened his mouth to speak, closed it again, and then finally managed,

"Magnus wouldn't… He's not…" He seemed to be struggling to comprehend it. "He's not a murderer, is he?"

I shook my head sadly. "I don't know. After all, we've only known him about a year. Who knows what he's been up to for the centuries he's been around before that?"

"No. I refuse to believe it." Simon looked determinedly off into the distance. "Alec wouldn't date a murderer."

"Did you know one of the reasons they broke up was because Magnus refused to tell him anything about his history?"

He sighed. "No. I didn't. And I don't know what I'm supposed to think, if I'm to be completely honest with you. I don't want to believe it."

"Neither do I." I paused for a moment. "I can't get the image of them out of my head. Magnus looked awful. Worse than I've ever seen him."

"Hey." He seemed unsure of what to say, so he put his arm around me.

"He looked like he'd been starved. And… He was covered in scars I swear he never had before. I hope I just hadn't been paying enough attention." I pictured him in my head. Dressed in nothing but a pair of torn, bloodstained jeans, bruises at his throat and all over his arms. More than one scar crossing his chest and telltale chafing at his wrists. I wasn't making it up. "…I'm beginning to think they forced that confession out of him."

Simon frowned. "You mean like Aldertree tried to do to me?"

I nodded. "Only worse. He wasn't just starved. I just can't believe the Clave would be so cruel. Especially with my father in charge of that side of things."

He made a face. "No offence, Izzy, but I don't think your dad is exactly the epitome of kindness to Downworlders. Especially since this particular Downworlder corrupted his precious son beyond redemption." He said this last with a sarcastic tone. "He's got a lot against Magnus."

"Yeah but he wouldn't…" He wouldn't torture him like that, would he?

I thought about his past. The stories I'd heard about how Valentine's circle, with him a part of it, tortured and murdered countless Downworlders, rogue or not. I didn't want to believe my own father had done that, but the more I thought about it, the more likely it became.

That settled it. Tomorrow I was going to get the truth out of him. For now though…

I climbed on top of Simon, smiling a little at his reaction. Even if he didn't blush, the way his eyes widened and his lips quirked into a smile instinctively showed how flustered I made him. It was fucking adorable.

"Distract me…" I murmured in his ear before leaning down to kiss him.

We stayed like that for some time.

The next day, back at the Institute, I sent a fire message to father, politely asking him to come talk to me. I considered asking rudely, but figured that he wouldn't respond that way. Then, later that day, he stepped through a portal. I told him to meet me alone, in the Sanctuary. That way no one would interrupt.

"Father." I stated coldly by way of greeting.

"Hello, Isabelle. What did you want to discuss?" Blunt, brief, and to the point. Just as he always was.

"I want to know exactly what's been going on. What happened to my friend."

"The warlock?" He looked incredulous. "How can you possibly consider that monster your friend?!"

"Magnus has helped us more times than we care to admit. Sure, he's not exactly conventional, but he's not a bad person."

"He's a murdere-"

"Is he though?" I interrupted. "Because he didn't seem like it to me. And when I last saw him, he looked as though he'd been tortured. Tortured. How can you possibly expect anyone to give a truthful account when they're being forced to say exactly what you want them to?"

"You saw him?! Isabelle, he's a criminal! Did you let him go?!" He was beginning to get riled up now. But so was I, and I wasn't going to back down.

"Yes! I did! Because I don't think he did do it. And for the record, father, you've made very wrong judgments in the past, so forgive me if I don't take your word as gospel." At this point I had drawn myself up to full height, glaring at him defiantly, and though I wasn't as tall as him, I knew I still cut an imposing figure. He looked wounded at this comment.

"Isabelle… How can you stand for this?" His voice wasn't angry this time. This took me by surprise. He sounded… sincerely upset. I held my place.

"Stand for what? My friend being held captive and tortured by people I'm supposed to believe are the just law of the land? I don't!"

"I mean…" He hesitated. He genuinely hesitated. "How can you see the mockery he's making of… of your brother." He had broken eye contact, staring determinedly at the ground. As though he were warding off tears. But no. That couldn't be true. I don't think I had ever seen my father cry before. Even at Max and Alec's funerals.

"He's not making a mockery of anything. You just refuse to see the truth." I said coldly.

He looked up at me, a mixture of horror and desperation in his eyes. I'd never seen him like this.

"Don't tell me… Please, Angel, don't tell me he's taken you in. This… This creature he's made a pet of… He's desecrating Alec's memory! Can't you see that?! First I lose my youngest, my baby, and then I lose my first son, the first…" He took a deep breath. "The first person I ever truly loved, and now this… thing won't let me mourn in peace! It's bad enough that I'll never get to see him marry, see him become a wonderful parent just as I know he would have made… Even if the kids weren't his, I don't care! I'd love them just as I'd love any full blooded grandkids of mine! But now I have to watch this demon take his place! It's the ultimate insult to his memory, and I-" He stopped short, putting a hand over his mouth to stifle a sob. He looked just as shocked as I felt, as a tear ran down his cheek.

I didn't know how to react.

I watched silently as he gasped for breath in front of me, unable to stop now that he'd started. He looked… broken.

"Dad…" I said softly. "I know it's hard to believe. It's not fair, any of it, but Magnus wouldn't try to replace Alec like that. It's not part of some plot to destroy us from the inside or anything like that. We found out by accident. I've spoken to him. I've even spent time training with him in here. That's not some mindless Eidolon. I know my brother well enough to tell."

"It-" He gasped. "It's not possible." His voice was hoarse, barely managing to be audible.

"I don't know. If Magnus is telling the truth, and Lucifer is his dad… It might be."

He shook his head. "Isabelle… Don't do this. Don't tell me this. I couldn't… I couldn't be responsible…" I knew exactly what he was thinking. He couldn't be responsible for running him through with a Seraph blade if it was true. He couldn't take the idea that he'd hurt his own son like that.

"I'm sorry. I believe him, so if you trust me you have to face up to what you've done." It may have been harsh, but even with him broken and crying in front of me, I knew he didn't deserve my kindness.

"Do you… Do you think he'll forgive me?"

"I don't know." I wouldn't lie. "Maybe. He's a good person. It's just a question of how believable you are. Because I don't want him to let his guard down only to be hurt by you again. You've caused him so much heartache. You'll have to do an awful lot to make up for it."

He nodded, seeming to compose himself. He straightened up again, clearing his throat. "And the warlock?"

"Magnus," I stated accusingly, "will not forgive so easily. Accusing him of a class A crime and forcing him to confess like that is not something to take lightly."

"So you stand by his innocence?"

"I do."

"…Okay. I trust you. But even so… Even if he didn't kill the Blackthorn boy, he's still guilty of using dark magic."

"So am I." I stuck my nose in the air defiantly. "Simon, Alec and I asked Magnus to summon the Greater Demon Azazel when we were looking for a way to separate Jace and Sebastian."

"His name is Jonathan, Isabelle. I will not dishonour Sebastian Verlac's memory."

"Fine. Jonathan. Either way, we are equally guilty. Are you going to punish us too?"

"No! That's-"

"No, it's not different. It's discrimination. Either you rescind his punishment or you throw all of us in the Silent City as well. Or I'll walk there myself."

"Isabelle, please… I can't just ask the Consul to change her mind. She won't believe me."

"Then at the very least let them know you bear them no ill will."

"How?"

"Let them stay here if they need to. They're now effectively on the run. They need to know they'll have at least one safe space."

He paused a moment, then agreed. "Alright. If you see them again… Give them my sincerest apologies. And tell Alec… Tell him his father misses him more than anything, and that he will never forgive himself for what he's done. Tell him I was never disappointed in him, only scared for him."

I gave him the barest hint of a smile. "I will. But at some point you'll have to tell him in person."

Then he did something else unexpected. He hugged me. "Thank you. I trust you are telling me the truth, and it feels as though you've given Alec back to me. Even if it's not okay yet, I have confidence that, thanks to you, it can be."

I retuned the hug. "Thank you for listening to me for once. You should do it more often." He pulled back and smiled at me, giving a short, shameful laugh.

"Who'd have thought I'd be shown up by my own daughter like this."

"You should consider yourself lucky you have someone to talk sense into you. And be grateful I'm willing to do the hard work of being mediator."

"I am, Isabelle. I thank Raziel every day that I have you."

"Well… You probably have important Inquisitor business to attend to, don't you?"

"Yeah. Goodbye, Isabelle."

"Goodbye, dad."

So we parted ways on much better terms than I expected. I found myself wondering what Alec and Magnus were up to. I hoped father's apology would be enough. I knew it wouldn't, but I could still hope.


	22. Love

Magnus POV

He was back. i knew it immediately. Something in the way he held himself, the little smile that flickered across his lips when he saw me. And, of course, his eyes, once more that stunning blue I could stare into all day.

"Alec… You're back." I felt a bubble of elation in my chest. I grinned at him, and he ran towards me, hugging me tightly. I hugged him back equally as enthusiastically.

"By the Angel, Magnus. I'm so sorry…"

"For what?" I laughed.

"For… I don't even know." He looked up at me with those gorgeous eyes, and then pulled me into a kiss. It was much like the first time he'd done that, the night he'd come to me asking if I wanted to date him, only this time he was a lot better at it. And, just like then, my heart fluttered in my chest.

He broke away, a smile on his face, and I tucked his hair back behind his ear before kissing his forehead lightly.

"See? I know what I'm doing."

He rolled his eyes at me. "Do we need to clear up before we leave?"

I waved my hand, erasing the pentagram with a single spell. "There. Now let's go. I believe I have a promise to make up to you… I smirked at him, kissing the side of his throat. He practically melted into my arms.

"Angel, Magnus…"

I grinned. I always knew exactly how to get these reactions out of him. Taking his hand, I led him out of the room and along the hall. He eagerly followed as we made our way back to the suite. I smirked at Naho as we passed reception, and she rolled her eyes at me. She knew exactly what I was going to do to the gorgeous boy I was pulling behind me.

I had underestimated how impatient he was. As soon as the door to the suite was closed behind us, he pushed me up against the wall, kissing me roughly. I gasped into his mouth, surprised by his enthusiasm. He didn't take charge very often, but when he did he really went for it. The feeling of his hand slipping under my shirt and brushing my waist made me shiver. My own hands found their way to his belt loops, which I used to pull him closer to me. He forced his leg between mine, putting pressure on all the right places. I bit my lip as he trailed kisses down my neck, occasionally being rougher. I tilted my head, exposing my throat to him, wanting him to mark me, and he obliged. I felt heat in my cheeks as he lavished attention on me, and I wanted him to take this further.

"The bed…" I whispered in his ear. He nodded, letting me free so he could take me there and push me back onto it, pulling off his shirt as I looked up at him. Throwing it aside, he climbed on top of me, lavishing kisses on my throat and collarbones once more. I was torn between closing my eyes and losing myself in sensation and watching him as he had his way with me. He pushed my shirt up to expose my chest, and I moved enough to take it off completely before sinking back down into the mattress. His hands ran over the newly exposed skin, and he leaned in to kiss me again, so that his body pressed up against mine. I arched into him, letting my tongue explore his mouth a little as his fingertips dug into my hip bones. His teeth grazed my lower lip and I responded by bucking up against him. When he broke away, meeting my gaze, my lips felt a little swollen from all the attention. I could see the lust in his eyes, no doubt mirrored in my own.

He once again trailed his lips over me, slowly enough that I could feel the heat of his breath on my skin. It drove me crazy. And when his tongue brushed over my nipple I damn near moaned from that alone. He seemed to like this, and did it again, sending all sorts of feelings through me, including twitches of pleasure right to my cock. He made sure not to neglect the other, and I got goosebumps where the cool air touched my wet skin.

"More… Please…" He glanced up at me, always happy to oblige, and continued down. Undoing the button on my jeans, he pulled them down only a little before I got frustrated and waved my hand, removing them magically and depositing them across the room. I smirked at him as he gave me a look.

"You're that desperate?"

"You can talk."

He blushed, which was simultaneously adorable and seriously sexy. "Shut up."

He managed to get me to do just that as his hand brushed the front of my boxers, making me gasp.

He kissed the bare skin just above the waistband of my underwear, teasing me with his fingertips. I let a small moan escape me, watching him intently. He was being relentless, giving me just enough attention to not be able to focus, but not enough to actually get me anywhere.

"Alec… Quit teasing."

"No." He responded, grabbing me hard enough to force a sharp intake of breath from me, making me twitch. "I like this."

Goddamn it. He was going to make me beg, wasn't he?

"Alec… Love… Please?" I put on my best pleading look.

"Mmm…" He tugged lightly at my waistband, as though deciding whether or not to remove that last layer of clothing. "Please what?" My eyes widened. I didn't get this from him very often. But hey, if he wanted it I'd gladly play along.

"Please give me more…"

"More what?" He smirked at me.

"Touch me more… I want you to touch me… And I want you to suck me off." I gave him an innocent look, biting my lip. I saw the flash of surprise and lust in his eyes, before he went back to trying and failing to be nonchalant.

"Maybe… Since you ask so nicely." Finally, taking his sweet time with doing it, he pulled my boxers off, leaving me bare in front of him. He watched my reactions as he began stroking me slowly. My eyes fluttered shut at the pleasure radiating through me. And when I felt his tongue on the tip of my cock I moaned again, having to hold back from bucking into his mouth. For a while he only used his tongue, running it up and down my length, teasing my slit and kissing me gently from time to time. But he and I both knew it wasn't what I wanted.

"Alec, stop teasing me already…"

"Hm? You want more?" His hand cupped my balls. "You mean like this?" And he went down on me properly, taking the head of my dick into his mouth without breaking eye contact. I found myself wondering through the sudden wave of pleasure how the hell he managed to still look innocent with another man's cock between his lips. I loved it.

He began to move, bobbing his head back and forth, going a little further each time. His mouth was hot and wet and felt amazing around me. Before too long, I hit the back of his throat. I felt him stop to compose himself, felt him relax, before he pushed further, and I felt the soft warmth of his throat as he deepthroated me. It had taken him a lot of practice to be able to do this, and he'd perfected it.

"God, Alec…" I threaded my fingers through his hair, watching him as he took me right to the hilt, swallowing around me. The motion sent sparks through me, making my toes curl. I felt the tension inside me building with every movement he made. As soon as he was comfortable, he let me have a bit of free rein to move, which I took, fucking his mouth slowly. He moaned around me, and I could feel the low vibrations, drawing out a moan of my own. I wanted to be rougher, wanted more to satisfy the growing lust in me, but I didn't dare use him like I wanted to. Instead I let him choose the pace, as much self control as it took. But even I couldn't control the movement he forced from me when he oh-so-lightly grazed my shaft with his teeth. I moaned his name, feeling the pace of my breathing speed up. He was pushing me to the edge, I could feel it. And he knew it too, because he sped up, moaning lightly and using his tongue to intensify the sensations. He used his hands too, playing with my balls and making everything so much better.

I didn't last much longer.

"Oh God! Ah…" I pulled at his hair, feeling my whole body tense. "Alec, I…" I cried out his name as I came, bucking hard into his mouth. He took it, and I felt him swallow, the motions of his throat only drawing out my orgasm. He didn't stop until I was gasping for air, twitching under him from the intensity of the situation. When he came up, he was wiping his lip with his thumb. I watched him from half-lidded eyes, feeling more than a little weak. He smiled at me, leaning over me, his hands either side of my head. I put my hand on the back of his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. He obliged, and his lips tasted salty. I didn't mind. He bit my lip gently, just a tease, before pulling away.

"Can I top today?" There was a hint of colour in his cheeks as he asked. I nodded.

"Fuck me hard." His blush deepened, but he grinned. He got off me, and I positioned myself on top of the sheets as he stripped off his jeans and boxers. I watched him eagerly, appreciating his gorgeous ass as he bent over.

"Quit staring." He stated without even looking at me. I smirked.

"I can't help it. It's just too cute."

"Shut up."

"Yes, master." He straightened up and turned to me, his expression shocked and aroused.

"What did you just call me?"

"I called you master. Now come get me." I spread my legs for him lewdly. He stared for a moment, and then got on top of me, and I could feel the heat coming off him. I summoned a bottle of lube and held it up for him. He took it, pouring some into his hand and rubbing it over his fingers. Before too long I felt his slick fingertip teasing my perineum. Even that touch made my post-orgasmically sensitive body twitch.

"Alec, please," I found myself saying. I could feel a familiar burn where he touched me. So close to being too much, and yet still not enough.

"Uh uh." He didn't stop teasing me. "I'm in charge. I decide what you get."

I felt myself flush with arousal. "I like this dominant you. You should do this more often." My voice was breathy. I felt his breath on my neck, and felt him kiss softly a spot just below my ear. It left my skin tingling.

"Maybe I will." He simultaneously bit down on the side of my throat and pushed a finger inside me. I all but screamed, the sudden sensation taking me entirely by surprise. He sucked the spot on my neck, and I knew I'd have a gorgeous hickey once he was done. His finger moved inside me, and my overly sensitive nerves felt everything. It didn't hurt, except for a very slight burn where he'd entered me. I swore to God I could feel his fingernail tickling me, and I loved it. I began to move against him, letting out stuttered gasps and moans. His body rested on mine, the warm weight of him on top of me both comforting and a massive turn on. His lips brushed against my throat, leaving marks where it pleased him to do so. I adored the feeling of being so totally and utterly his. He pushed a second finger inside me, and I couldn't hold back a slight sound of pain. I didn't quite have the threshold he had when it came to pain, though I had experienced a lot of it lately. He stopped ravaging my throat for a moment to check I was okay, and I nodded, letting him know he was good to keep going. He kissed me, being slow and gentle, but I could sense dominance and passion behind it. His tongue found its way into my mouth and I submitted for him, letting him explore me thoroughly. His fingers stroked my insides, and he knew exactly what he was doing as he curled them, finding the perfect angle to put pressure on my prostate. I moaned his name, pleasure shooting through me. I wondered at how far he'd come since we first got together. He knew how to play me like an instrument, and you could bet he was getting music out of me. I pressed my body to his, grinding up on him as he finger fucked me, his lips still on mine. My fingers dug into the sheets at my sides, the fabric balling up in my fist. His fingertips rubbed my sweet spot consistently, and I felt a little lightheaded from the overwhelming sensation. I was almost certainly hard again, ready to be fucked. He scissored his fingers, stretching me. The pain was inconsequential, coupled with pleasure as it was.

"Alec, I'm ready…" I managed to get out, amidst the disgustingly erotic noises I knew I was making. He didn't waste any time in pulling back, leaving me empty. I shivered at the slight chill as his skin left mine. He lubed up, biting his lip as he rubbed the slick liquid over his cock. Then he leaned over me once more, and I could feel him hard against my backside. He pushed against me, but not quite into me. I growled in frustration.

"Tell me how much you want it." He murmured into my ear.

"So much… I want it more than anything…"

He was silent for a moment, as though hesitating, and then he stated simply, "Beg."

I felt a shiver go down my spine, I felt so vulnerable right then.

"Alec… My love… My one and only… Please, God, fuck me senseless, I beg you." I heard the wanton tone in my voice and I hoped it would be enough.

It was.

He thrust into me, roughly enough that I cried out in a mix of pleasure and pain. My breath came in pants, and I heard his grunt of pleasure as he held himself deep inside me. He waited, letting me acclimate to the sensation before beginning to move again, once I'd muttered, "Do it."

He looked into my eyes as he fucked me long and slow and deep, his gorgeous blue eyes almost animalistic with lust. My nails clawed at his back and he gasped, his body pressing against mine as he arched his back, throwing his head back. I wondered if he was bleeding. At any rate, he growled and moved faster, rougher in retaliation. I was almost completely lost in sensation as he thrust into me. Like the expert he was, he jerked his hips upwards, hitting my prostate hard. I screamed his name as he nailed me in exactly the right spot with every thrust. I didn't even need him to touch my cock; I knew I would come from this alone. I couldn't stay relaxed, and I knew he could feel me tense around him as he moaned.

"Angel, Magnus…" He kissed me hard, fast and messily, not once slowing. "I love you… I love you so much…"

All I could do to respond was to kiss him again, my fingers knotting in his hair. He bit my lip harder than he had before, and my head spun. I knew I wasn't going to last much longer.

"Alec…" My breath mingled with his, his face millimetres from mine. "I… I can't…" He struck my prostate hard again, cutting me off as I cried out. I figured I got the message across as he went harder, faster, sending waves of heat through me as the tension in my stomach reached a plateau. My breath wouldn't come smoothly. I gasped and spasmed, my arms tight around him. I held him against me, screaming as I came. I vaguely heard him moan my name. He didn't slow down, pushing me further than I thought possible. Even so, it didn't take long for him to follow suit. I felt an explosion of warmth deep inside me, and he collapsed on top of me, panting hard. Blissed out to the point of teetering on the edge of consciousness, I stroked his hair gently. He closed his eyes, and I could tell all the tension had melted from his body.

"I think that might have been the best sex I've ever had." I heard myself say, and in that moment, I completely believed it, even though it would have been a difficult comparison to make. I could feel stickiness between us, but at the time neither of us cared.

For a while, we could forget everything that had happened, and everything that no doubt would happen, and just be safe, comfortable and happy, floating on our little cloud nine. And so we did, wrapped in each others' arms, sticky, exhausted, smelling of sweat and sex and feeling better than we had in days.


	23. Return

Magnus POV

"I don't know what came over me." Alec's voice, soft and contented, broke through my reverie.

"What do you mean?" I noticed that speaking made my throat hurt a little. I must have strained my vocal chords a touch. I stroked his hair gently as he rested on my chest.

"I mean… I've never been in charge like that before. Not really. I don't know why I did it."

"Well, I'm certainly not complaining." I smirked at him. He blushed a little, glaring up at me. My expression softened a little. "Power high, maybe. I mean, I'd noticed your magic was a lot more controlled and powerful after I summoned you. Maybe a stronger you comes with a more dominant streak."

"You think so?" He frowned at me, looking uncertain. "That seems a bit… I don't know. Out of nowhere."

"Not really." I theorised, "If you think about it, the first time you used your power you made a show of force towards me."

He grimaced. "I'd rather not think about that. I hate the idea that I might put you in danger."

"I trust you, love. You know I do."

"That doesn't help. It just means you'll be more vulnerable around me."

"Alec…" I stroked his cheek gently. His sky blue eyes- lighter when he was truly happy- met mine. "You won't hurt me. No amount of power or strength or anything will ever make you a danger to me. I know it." I smiled at him. "And even if we just completely disregard all the weirdness that's happened lately, it shows self confidence. No, you would never have acted like that when we first got together. It means you've become confident in your abilities and yourself as a person." It showed he was growing up. Maturing into the self assured, quietly confident person I knew he had it in him to become. I had noticed that he had lost a lot of the awkwardness and insecurity he used to hold himself with, and I was proud of him for that. And whilst I did love having him blushing and gentle beneath me, I liked this role reversal just as much in a completely different way.

He smiled softly. "Thanks, Magnus."

"You're welcome, Angel."

"And… Did you really mean what you said?"

"Hm?"

"That… That was the best you've ever had?"

I pondered for a moment. Memories of centuries' worth of relationships rushed through my head. I pushed them aside. I had known for a while now that no one had ever or would ever measure up to this boy, this blue-eyed angel in my arms, again. As for our times together… I remembered our first time, him almost shaking under me with nerves and cheeks flushed very red as he let me see him, all of him for the first time. I remembered our times on holiday, watching him slowly grow accustomed to the newfound intimacy of our relationship. And then when he came back, and I held him in my arms again after thinking I'd lost this forever, I'd lost him forever. And now this. Knowing that after all we'd been through, the pain and the heartache and the trials, he'd come back stronger than ever before.

"Yeah." I said softly. "I think so."

He looked shocked for a moment, then I saw a hint of smugness in his expression. I laughed as he snuggled into my chest, clearly pleased with himself.

After a lot of cuddling and a quick shower (which we shared this time), we decided we couldn't ignore the problem at hand any longer. We had to begin thinking of a plan of action. We couldn't live as outlaws forever. Someone would find us eventually. We'd need to find some way to get back on the Clave's good side if we ever wanted to live in peace again. Though I did not think I could sweet talk all of them into believing my lies the way I had Isabelle. She was inclined to trust me where they definitely were not.

Plus there was the somewhat difficult issue of Alec not knowing the truth.

I had contemplated telling him several times, but in every scenario I could imagine, it ended with him getting very, very upset with me. I knew I was being horrendously selfish, but I didn't think that would be beneficial to either of us, especially not in the state we were in now. I kept it from him under the pretence that I was keeping him safe, though a voice in the back of my mind insisted upon reminding me that I was doing it so I wouldn't lose him again. It had very nearly been the death of both of us last time.

Still… If he trusted in my innocence he might be able to persuade others too. He was not an accomplished liar by any stretch of the imagination, and everyone who knew him was aware of that fact.

"We need to talk to Jace and Izzy." Alec stated after we'd discussed our current situation. "They know us and trust us. The Clave won't listen if we contact them directly. They might be able to help." I nodded.

"Since we've spoken to them already… And they know you are actually you, unlike everyone else."

"Yeah."

I bit my lip, thinking. "The only problem is I can almost guarantee New York is under very close surveillance. They'll be expecting us to show up there."

"Could we send them a fire message? I'm fairly sure those can't be monitored."

"What if your mother reads it? Last time we trusted her to keep a secret she failed. Dismally."

"Mm…"

"Perhaps we could send a message to someone else and get them to speak for us. Someone close to them, who they trust."

"Who, though?"

"What about that vampire boy your sister is dating? They've probably spoken to him about it, right? I mean, he somehow manages to get involved in everything one way or another."

"Simon?" Alec looked taken aback. "I don't know… I mean, won't he be being watched too?"

"Not if he's under the protection of the Praetor Lupus, I wouldn't have thought. They have their own jurisdiction that Shadowhunters don't get involved in."

"And if his roommate reads it?"

"We just have to trust that if he does, he won't come after us." It was a risk, I knew, but I wasn't sure how else to accomplish this. It was the best plan we had. Alec seemed unsure, but he nodded.

"Alright. It's the best we've got."

We scavenged a piece of paper and a pen from reception, deciding to put our plan into action straight away. The sooner we could get this cleared up the better.

_Simon,_

_Hi. So I'm sure you've heard stories concerning us. Hopefully Izzy has told you that I am not evil and Magnus is not a murderer. If not, well, hopefully you trust us enough to believe us._

_Anyway. So we need you to talk to Izzy for us. We can't contact her directly because the Clave will be expecting that. Tell her to meet us at the Hunter's Moon this Saturday at 7pm. And tell her to bring Jace._

_Alec_

I let Alec write the letter because his knack of getting straight to the point seemed the right tactic to use, and because his handwriting is more legible than mine. Plus, if Alec wrote it, the boy might be more likely to believe us. After all, he was the one who was supposed to be a demon under my control. I read through it, giving it my seal of approval, before sending it up in flames with a flick of my wrist. If Simon got our message, that gave us three days to get into Brooklyn undetected. We'd picked the Hunter's Moon as our contact place because, as a werewolf hideout, the place would almost certainly not be under surveillance, and we were on good terms with most of the New York pack. Even if they had heard the news, it was unlikely that they would dabble in Shadowhunter affairs, unless we proved ourselves a threat to them. We'd probably give ourselves another day at least before moving on, since the less time spent in dangerous territory the better.

The next day was spent doing everything we could to prepare. Alec insisted upon checking the few wounds I hadn't been able to heal myself, making sure I was properly taken care of, though I assured him that unless we ended up in a fight, none of my new scars would break open again. Naturally I was a little sore, for more than one reason, but not enough to pose any risk. The biggest threat, as much as I hated to admit it, was probably Alec losing control of himself if put in a tight situation. It was almost certain that we'd bump into people we knew in the city, and if they reacted negatively… Well, someone might get hurt, and it might not be us. Alec wouldn't forgive himself if he hurt someone he knew. I wasn't sure how to prevent that, so I just had to trust Alec's newfound control would be enough to keep him under wraps. Of course, it would be better if we weren't put in that situation at all.

When the time came to leave, we packed up all our stuff and I prepared a portal. It was a good thing all the stuff we'd brought with us could fit in just two bags, because I had no idea what we were going to do when we were there. Most likely get a room in some mundane hotel, unless I could persuade one of my Downworlder friends to give us board and lodgings. Alec, despite my criticisms, had decided to sling his bow and quiver over his shoulder. I had advised him that any move we could make to make ourselves less of a threat would be better, but the weapon seemed to make him feel more secure, so eventually I relented. However, I did remind him to only use it in dire circumstance, where diplomacy definitely wouldn't work.

Finally ready, we checked out, handing back our room key, and portaled onto a familiar street. I had avoided the centre of the city, but we were still close enough to be able to walk to our destination. When sirens did not go off at our imminent arrival, I put up a quick glamour to change our appearances in the eyes of the mundanes around us and we got moving.

We kept on high alert the whole time, always conscious that there might be someone watching us, ready to report back to the Clave and bring angelic wrath down on our heads at any time. The glamour I had put up was strong, but I doubted those with the Sight would be fooled. We made our way to the Downworlder tavern our werewolf friends were so fond of, catching a few glances here and there which worried me, but no one said anything. I found us a quiet table at the back of the tavern, where we settled in to wait for Isabelle and friends to show up. Hopefully the message had gotten through. I had no idea how long we should wait.

We were only sat down for a few minutes when a face I recognised, distinctive as it was, came over. The hugely tall werewolf known as Bat Velasquez, acting head of the New York pack, surveyed me with a curious eye. Alec stared at the table uncomfortably.

"Well, well, well. Magnus Bane. What're you doing down this end of town?" He sounded amused, so I felt it was safe to assume he held no ill will towards me. "Heard you got yourself into a bit of a scuffle with the Clave." He grinned. "Nice one."

"Yes, it was all very entertaining. I'm here on business. If a couple of Shadowhunter kids wander in, send them our way."

He stared at me disbelievingly. "You what now? Do you have a death wish, Bane?"

"Nah, these ones are friendly. They're relatives of Alec's."

Now Bat's eyes turned to Alec, who gave me a look that silently conveyed a definite 'I'm going to kill you' vibe. "Oh yeah. Isn't he supposed to be dead?"

"Tactful." I gave him a look. "But yes, supposedly. I could tell you the story but we'd be here all evening."

"Mm. I'm sure. Just don't go stirring up trouble in my precinct."

"We're trying our hardest not to, I promise."

"Alright. Well, good luck."

"Thanks." He moved off.

We were there a while, but eventually I spotted a familiar face. That golden hair was unmistakeable. Alec perked up, having spotted them too, and waved them over. It appeared that only Isabelle and Jace had shown, as Alec had asked, though he had never specified asking them to not bring Clary or Simon. Still, I was grateful.

"Hey!" Jace addressed Alec, who smiled at him.

"Hey. S'been a while."

"Yeah. The last time I saw you you didn't look too good. You alright?"

Alec nodded.

"I'm fine too, in case you were wondering." I quipped.

"Ah, the Magnificent Magnus Bane. How the mighty have fallen." He smirked.

"Very funny Golden Boy."

"So you swear innocence, even though you gave a full confession in front of the Clave?"

"You saw the state I was in. I didn't have much of a choice."

"Mm." Isabelle looked sour. "I can't believe they would actually do something like that." I gave her a sad look, hoping she didn't know just who had held the whip.

"So. Let's cut to the chase."

"We need to convince the Clave of Magnus's innocence and that I am actually me." Alec broke in, looking determined.

"That won't be easy."

"I know. But we can't just live as outlaws forever. Didn't you say they have orders to kill Magnus on sight? We can't risk that."

"How can we do that, though? I doubt Consul Penhallow will be lenient. You know her daughter's dating a Blackthorn, right? If they think you killed Tiberius, they're not going to let you go easy."

Alec turned to me. "So that's what you confessed to?"

"Yeah." I couldn't meet his eye.

"That's… That's serious, Magnus. Why would you do that?"

"I had to. They expected it of me." And the guilt was weighing on me too much to let it slide. But I didn't say that. Not here.

Alec looked troubled. "I don't know how we're gonna fix this."

"We'll figure something out." Isabelle reassured him. "We're halfway there already. I spoke to Dad."

"You did?" Alec looked surprised. I had to say, I was surprised as well. After the way he'd treated us, I was sure he'd never be on our side.

"How the hell did you manage that?"

"I'm his daughter. He has to listen to me."

"So what's the verdict? Is he going to vouch for us?"

"He said he probably can't persuade the Council on his own. But he'll do what he can."

"Okay. That's a start."

"Yeah."

"Can we stay with you again?" Alec blurted. Clearly it had been weighing on his mind. Isabelle looked taken aback.

"Alec… I don't know. It might be too dangerous. Everyone'll be expecting you guys back here. Besides, you can't come in the Institute any more. You'd have to stay in the Sanctuary, and that wouldn't really be very pleasant. Isn't there anywhere else you can go? Magnus? Can't you call in a favour from one of your friends or something?"

I blinked at her. "What, just because I'm old I have loads of friends who owe me stuff?"

"Well you do, don't you?"

I made a face. "I owe more favours than I'm due."

"Well… You have money, right? You charge out the butt for your services, so you must have something put away for a rainy day."

I considered that one. It was true, I did have a decent sum of money in an account somewhere. Using that I could get us a place. Maybe on the outskirts of town. Just somewhere inconspicuous we could use as a base of operations until I could get my apartment back.

"Yeah, we could rent a place out in the suburbs for a bit."

Alec nodded. "Probably our best bet."

"How should we contact you?" Jace interrupted. "I mean, they'll be monitoring our phones and you can't keep sending messages through the resident nerd." Isabelle glared at him.

"His name is Simon, Jace."

"Yeah yeah I know."

"Uh… We could arrange a place to leave messages. One of those safe lockers or something, that both of us have the code to." I suggested.

"Like one of those post things?"

"Yeah."

"Okay… So let's say we'll meet up here again in… two days' time. We'll set up the box, and we'll give you the address and a key so we can both access it. Then we just have to check it periodically to see if the other has left a message." I nodded.

"Yeah. Sounds like a plan."

"Same time?"

"Yeah."

Having come to an agreement, the conversation seemed to draw to a natural conclusion. I couldn't think of anything else we needed to discuss.

"If there's any update on our legal situation, let us know."

"Of course."

"Well, see you around." Alec smiled. "It's been nice to see you guys. I missed you."

"We missed you too!" Isabelle stood up, and then pulled her brother into a hug. "Don't be a stranger. I worry about you."

He smiled. "You don't need to worry. We can take care of ourselves."

She gave him a look that said otherwise.

"Hey, I've just had an unlucky streak. I made it eighteen years without getting majorly hurt. I just need to get back in the game." He looked affronted.

"You're my brother. I can't not worry about you."

He didn't reply, instead just hugging her back. Jace stood up too, and rested his hand on his ex-Parabatai's shoulder.

"I trust you, but don't be dumb."

"Speak for yourself." Alec smiled. "Don't burn Clary cuz you can't control yourself."

Jace made a face. "I'm trying to get it under control, I promise."

"I know." Alec went in for a hug, but then stopped, thinking better of it. "…Better not risk it."

Jace nodded. "Probably best." Instead, he held out his hand for a fist bump, but even then Alec pulled his hand away, hissing and shaking burnt knuckles.

"Hey. Quit burning my boyfriend." I stood up, taking Alec's hand. Jace made a face. "Oh grow up. I know what you're like with your girlfriend. I'm sure you're just as bad as us behind closed doors."

"Ahem." Jace waved his hand. "Magical fire of abstinence."

"Right. Poor you and all that." I could just hear the sympathy dripping from my voice.

Jace rolled his eyes.

"Well. See you around then." Isabelle smiled and then turned away, taking Jace with her. We watched as they swept out of the bar together, garnering several suspicious stares from the other bar patrons.

Over the next couple of days, we found a place. It was a relatively nice apartment block, quite small, but then we didn't need a lot of space. Rent was… decent. I could afford it without too much trouble. Though if we were going to be staying here a while, I would need to start up business again. I wanted to avoid that as long as possible to avoid drawing unwanted attention. I supposed I could go back into black market sales. They tended to be more on the down-low, and were less likely to attract Shadowhunters. Either way, my funds weren't going to last forever. Best get this mess out of the way as quickly as possible.

The PO box system worked perfectly. The key exchange took place without a hitch and for a while we simply exchanged notes to see if it worked, with nothing much interesting to say. Still, we made an effort to check regularly, and leave our own messages in response. This correspondence continued without consequence until a couple weeks later, when the letter we found in our shared box was a lot shorter and a lot more urgent.

_LA Institute attacked_

_Idris trial underway_

_Sebastian is back._


	24. Hope

:PART ONE:

Alec POV

"Magnus… This could be what we need." I hated saying it, as I knew without a doubt that awful things had happened to the Blackthorns, but even so, here was surely irrefutable proof that Sebastian had committed the crimes to which Magnus had been forced to confess. "This might be enough to convince the Clave that you're innocent."

Magnus bit his lip, his eyes distant and unreadable. "Could be." He muttered. "Don't get your hopes up though."

I sighed. "Come on, don't be a pessimist."

"I'm not. I'm being a realist." He replied stubbornly.

"Whatever. Do you think we should visit them?"

"I think we should wait for them to say it's okay for us to visit. Leave a reply asking." He found a pen and a bit of paper, then began writing. I leaned over his shoulder to read what he had written.

Keep us updated. If it's safe for us to visit, let us know.

M + A

We deposited the note in the usual place, and then it was simply a matter of waiting for a response. I would have been checking every five minutes if left to my own devices, but Magnus kept me from visiting any more than once a day. Waiting for news was excruciating, both because I was worried for my family, and because of the trial which could mean our freedom. Eventually, after several days, we found a response.

Come over. Thursday, 4pm.

Its brevity was slightly concerning. No details, no explanation. I assumed all would be explained once we were there, but even so. I would have expected even a little context. Maybe she was being watched. In which case, it might not be safe to go. But Magnus and I discussed it, and came to the conclusion that my sister was smart enough to not invite us over if there was danger. Still, when it came to the date, I made sure to carry my bow and swords with me just in case. Magnus didn't take anything to defend himself, but he didn't need to. We used a glamour, and kept to the shadows, keeping a keen eye out for any unfriendly characters. Still, we didn't encounter anything out of the ordinary, and were soon on the steps of the Institute. Magnus rang the bell and rapped smartly on the impressive door, looking impatient. It was a cold day, the skies deceptively clear and ice edging everything not in broad sunlight, and Magnus was wearing a long, thick coat which he pulled around himself, his breath misting in front of his face. I had declined a coat, but was wearing a jacket and a plush scarf Magnus had insisted I wear. I had to admit, it did help against the biting cold.

It took a few minutes, and a second knock before Izzy answered the door. She ushered us in, and Magnus entered gratefully. I would have followed, but something physically stopped me as I tried to cross the threshold. I was confused for a second, then remembered. I gave my sister a pleading look.

"Oh, Angel! Sorry Alec… Uh…" She thought for a moment. "I'll have Jace meet you in the Sanctuary, yeah?"

"M'kay." My heart sank a little as it had just been confirmed I'd never see my childhood home again, but I nodded."What about Magnus?"

"We've got some stuff to attend to. Legal stuff. You'd be welcome to join us, but all the paperwork's in the library…"

"No, it's okay. Just tell me as soon as you come to any kind of conclusion."

"Of course." She paused, and then hugged me. I hugged back, a little surprised, but grateful. "I promise we'll get this sorted out. I swear it." She muttered in my ear. I smiled softly.

"Thanks."

She let go, and I stepped back, putting my hands back in my pockets before they went numb. "I'll see you later." Looking behind her at Magnus, I let my expression become serious. "Don't get into any more trouble."

He smirked. "Your faith in me is astounding, Alexander."

I rolled my eyes. "That's because I know you. You're either going to fix everything or dig yourself an even deeper pit to climb out of, and it better be the former, because you're already halfway to China."

He stepped forwards and kissed me reassuringly. "I promise I'll clean this up. Just for you."

I sighed, hugging him softly, all of a sudden not wanting him to leave. "You better."

"Come on lovebirds. We've got business to attend to."

We broke apart reluctantly, and I waved goodbye, before turning to walk away. "Good luck."

"See you in a few." Magnus followed Izzy into the institute, and the door shut behind them. I walked around the Institute to where I knew the heavy iron door that lead to the Sanctuary was, and tried it. Upon finding it was locked, I leaned against the wall beside it and waited.

I was lost in thought, wondering what Magnus was up to, when the heavy door creaked beside me. I stood up straight just in time to see Jace appear in the doorway.

"Man it's cold down here." He grinned.

"You're telling me." I replied in a deadpan. "I think my nose is gonna fall off."

"You'd better come in then. Though I warn you it's not much warmer in here." He stepped aside, and I went in. He was right; the air in here was still chilly, but at least it was away from the wind. Behind me, Jace shut and locked the door once more, before turning to face me. Right… I don't know how long the others are going to take. Depends how well everything goes…" He pressed his lips together in disapproval. "Your boyfriend had better be on his best behaviour, because so far him and Clave law have not meshed well."

"I said the same thing, don't worry. Besides, you're one to talk."

"Oh shut up. They love me."

"They really don't. You're trouble and everyone knows it."

Rather than being offended, he grinned. "And I'm proud of it, too. No fun in being sensible." He glanced behind me for a second. "Speaking of sensible, I'd better be going. Important matters to take care of."

"You're just going to leave me here? I get that this is important and all, but you can't just abandon family while you sort out important things without him!"

"By important I mean go find my girlfriend. I'll be back, I promise! Just give me… Five minutes."

I glared at him. "So much for bros before hoes."

Jace blinked. "Excuse me, what?"

"Oh. It's a phrase I picked up from one of Magnus's TV programmes. It means-"

"I know what it means. Did you just call Clary a ho?" He glared at me, and I winced.

"No, it's just a saying."

"It better be." He motioned that he was watching me, and then headed for the door. "When we come back you're apologising to her!"

I couldn't help a small smile as I watched him go. I was glad they were still going strong. Once I had gotten over my own petty jealousy, I had to admit they were a good match. I knew they'd had their fair share of hardships, but so far they'd pulled through.

Partially to keep warm and partially to amuse myself whilst Jace was gone, I found myself conjuring a small fire, its flames a deep indigo as they flickered. I could feel the heat in my fingers, making them tingle as warmth was returned to them. I wondered if all warlocks' magic was different colours, or if mine was different to Magnus's purely because I was a demon. I was making the flames dance across my palm absent-mindedly when I heard an all too familiar voice behind me.

"So you can do magic now then, huh?"

A sudden wave of panic swept through me, and I instinctively reached for my bow and nocked an arrow, having it drawn back and ready to fire in seconds. He was standing a few metres away, his hands up, motioning that he meant no harm. My father, the Inquisitor. My eyes narrowed, but I couldn't see any weapons on him. Still, I didn't lower my bow, remembering the coil of the whip around my throat, the blade through my stomach and the scars… So many scars all over Magnus's back. I wanted to say something, to yell or to insult or to threaten, but I couldn't find the words. Not for the first time, I wished I had Jace's talent of always having something smart to say. But there was nothing. No words could express how I felt.

"Alec…" I raised an eyebrow. He used my name. Acknowledged that it was me. Did this mean he believed us…? "Alec. Please. Put down the bow."

"How do I know you won't hurt me?" My fingers trembled on the bowstring, though I didn't move an inch.

I saw pain in his expression. "Had I known, I would never have-"

"We tried to tell you. You wouldn't listen." I tried to keep my voice low and even, but I could hear the strain in my tone.

"I was hurt. Angry. I thought I was defending your honour."

"You were so quick to condemn Magnus. Didn't you have any faith in him? In me, for choosing him?"

"You have to understand, everyone thought it was imposs-!"

"I'm supposed to understand why the next time I saw him he was nearly dead?!" My voice shook with anger, my knuckles white around my bow. I took a deep breath, trying to keep myself under control. "You tortured him. Starved him. He was forced to confess just so he wouldn't die of dehydration or infection! I wouldn't care if what you blamed him of were true, no one deserves that!"

"Alec, I'm sorr-"

"NO!" My vision was blurring, my eyes hot with tears. There was a writhing tension in my chest, fuelling my anger. My fingertips sparked. "No, you don't get to say sorry! Not for that!" He took a step back, fear in his expression. Good.

"Alec, put the weapon down and listen to me! It wasn't my faul-"

I screamed in rage, letting instinct take over. My bow clattered to the floor, the loosed arrow stopping inches from the face of the man I now had pinned several feet up the Sanctuary wall. He gasped, winded from the sudden impact. My outstretched hand shook, and I could feel the energy it took to hold him there seeping out of me. Somewhere deep down, I knew this wasn't right, but it felt good to let it out. I'd been bottling it up for too long.

"Say that again." My tone was measured, icy cold. "Look me in the eye, and tell me it wasn't your fault. Tell me it wasn't you who ran me through as though I were little more than livestock. Tell me it wasn't your orders, your hand that left Magnus on the brink of death." I increased the pressure, knowing that if I dialled it up just a little more, I'd break bones. "Go on."

He didn't answer.

"I didn't think so. You are a sadistic, bigoted, narrow minded, pigheaded, filicidal murderer. Don't you dare make excuses. If you want to make up for what you did, admit to it. Don't hide behind your wall of self righteousness. Tell me that you did it out of spite, that you've always hated Magnus and you were just waiting for an excuse to hurt him. Tell me the truth. Only then will I even consider any kind of leniency."

Through staggered, hoarse breaths, he muttered something.

"I'm sorry? Speak up."

"Alright." He croaked. "I wasn't… I wasn't against it." The distance between the arrow and his face halved. "Fine! Fine! I wanted him to be guilty!" He looked down at me, his face a mix of emotions. "The way I saw it, he was nothing but bad for you. He was the reason you were so miserable those last few months. He was the reason you neglected your training. Alec, he was the reason you died. And then he shows up with… with a demon, claiming he'd done the impossible and brought you back, days after the Blackthorn kid went missing… I hated him. Although I see that he was telling the truth now, then it just looked like he'd made a sad imitation out of one of our sworn enemies, which was even worse than just letting you be dead." I frowned, feeling a sliver of something- sadness maybe? Or guilt? - worming its way through my ire. "He was making a mockery of your memory. So yes, I hated him. I wanted him to be guilty. I believed nothing was beneath this man who would dare make such a farce of my son's death, after he had been the one who caused it in the first place. Now I see what he did, and I feel nothing but shame. He did bring you back. He gave me back my first child and I paid him in nothing but pain and death."

I wavered for a moment, unsure of what to do, but then sighed and let go. He fell to the ground, his Shadowhunter instincts letting him land neatly on his feet. My arrow clattered to the ground beside him. I turned away, putting my hands over my eyes as a wave of lightheadedness went through me. The power subsided, and I was able to get my emotions back under control. Still, when he attempted to rest a hand on my shoulder, I pulled away.

"Don't touch me." He looked ashamed, and I couldn't bring myself to feel guilty. "Clean this mess up. Use all your power with the Clave to put an end to this. Then I might consider forgiving you. Maybe." I glared at him. "Don't hold your breath though."

He paused for a second, watching me sadly, then nodded. Sensing there was nothing more to say, he turned and left, leaving me alone to consider what had just happened.

:PART TWO:

Magnus POV

I'll admit it now- I had never liked the Institute. Even when I associated the place with Alec, I found it too roomy, too impersonal. And, of course, it carried with it the oppressive laws of the Clave. So with the current sentence of my crimes weighing on my shoulders, I felt like I was walking through a prison, on my way to ask for parole. Or maybe on my way to my trial. I knew a little about how Mundane law worked, and I assumed it would be fairer than Shadowhunter law. They might actually consider evidence to be necessary.

Isabelle led me through the Institute to a room I seemed to remember held the library. As she opened the door, I saw who was waiting behind it and froze. Isabelle realised I was no longer following and turned, beckoning me forwards.

"Come on, Magnus! They're not here to hurt you."

"Forgive me if I don't trust them." I muttered. But there was no avoiding it now, as the Consul had looked up from her place at the desk, and had seen me standing in the hallway. She attempted a courteous smile. I didn't respond. Still, I entered the room, holding my head high. I felt a little like a cornered animal, surrounded by Shadowhunters as I was. Team Good was standing to one side, with the addition of little Clary Fairchild, though her golden-haired lover was nowhere to be seen, I noted. So at least they were friendly. Maryse was there, looking as charming as ever, with her steely eyes fixed on me, and beside her stood Helen Blackthorn, who wouldn't look me in the eye. Aline Penhallow was holding her hand in quiet reassurance. It struck me that Robert wasn't here either. I could admit I was somewhat grateful for that.

"Warlock Bane." Jia smiled graciously, as though she had awarded me the highest of courtesies by deigning to use my name. I gave her a sardonic smile.

"Consul Penhallow. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

She cleared her throat, like she was about to broach sensitive territory. "Due to recent circumstances concerning the LA Institute, it has come to light that we may have been a little hasty in our conclusions surrounding your… discrepancies."

Oh, wow, the mighty Clave is admitting they made a mistake? I thought, though I didn't say it out loud; I did want to walk out of here with my head still on my shoulders.

"In light of Jonathan Morgenstern's attack, we have been made to consider that perhaps Isabelle Lightwood was telling the truth, and that you were wrongly convicted. Do you have any comment on the matter?"

I thought for a moment. "I am glad to see an imperfect justice system is willing to admit it makes mistakes. I am just grateful I was able to survive long enough to see it do so." Well, it was the truth. As the faeries say, nothing wrong with a bit of creative truth telling.

"Indeed.' She cleared her throat again. "In recompense, we would like to offer you pardon for your crimes. We are willing to overlook your use of dark magic since it has not caused any harm to anyone, however I am obliged to say it will not be tolerated again. Understood?"

"Yes." Outwardly, I did not react. Inwardly, I was in uproar. By some giant karmic mistake, I was going to get away with this? That easily? There had to be a catch. There had to be.

"Magnus, I am so sorry." I blinked, my attention turning to Helen Blackthorn. She was clearly feeling guilty; her expression was pitiful. My stomach twisted. "We should have at least tried to do a proper investigation. You shouldn't have had to endure any of that."

I couldn't look her in the eye. Instead, I nodded my head respectfully, acknowledging her kindness. Kindness I didn't deserve.

"Please, if there's anything we can do to make amends-"

"No." I said firmly. Then, more softly, "No. That won't be necessary. But thank you."

"Warlock pride." Jia smiled. I let them accept that explanation for my insistence. "Well, know then that you have our deepest apologies, and from now on we will endeavour to not make the same mistake again."

Well, at least something good came out of this.

"Now then." She continued. "I am sorry to have to do this, but with Jonathan Morgenstern on the loose, we need to begin preparing for war. Unfortunately, due to recent circumstances, Magnus, your position on the Council has been given to Catarina Loss. However, it would still be much appreciated if you would contribute your efforts to the cause. Of course, Alexander Lightwood will be most welcome in participating as well, though he cannot take part in official meetings due to his… uh… status…" she hesitated. "It had been brought to our attention that his newfound abilities may prove invaluable to us." Of course. There had to be a reason they were so eager to get us back on their side. "We have reason to believe he is employing demon armies as well his corrupted Shadowhunters, which may begin to move on us very soon. Having a demon in our ranks will give us an edge Jonathan will not expect us to have."

"You want to use Alec as a spy?" Jace sounded incredulous. "Consul, with all due respect Alec Lightwood is a horrendous liar and can't act for toffee." I couldn't hold back a snigger. It was too true.

"Even so," Jia glared at him, "I am sure we can employ his talents somewhere. Which is why we would like you two to remain in contact with the New York Institute, should any new information come up."

"Of course. We would anyway. Alec's family is here."

"Good. Now that that's settled, I believe it is time for us to depart." She stood, collecting her papers. Looking up, she caught the eye of someone standing behind me. "Ah. Robert. Just in time." I turned, feeling discomfort crawl up my spine, along the lines of my scars. He stood in the doorway, looking uncharacteristically humble. His eyes flickered to me briefly, then pointedly fixed on Jia. "I trust you resolved your issues?" Robert made a noncommittal noise that didn't quite constitute an answer, glancing at Isabelle.

"Well." Jia chose not to comment on his response. "We should get moving. Maryse, thank you for your hospitality. Aline, Helen, after you." With that, they all abruptly left. How like them, I thought, to stay just long enough to sort out the legal issues and then leave so they no longer have to tolerate your presence.

"Magnus." Isabelle broke the silence that followed. "I think you should go talk to Alec. I reckon he probably needs you right now." I frowned, then remembered what Jia had said to Robert- 'I trust you resolved your issues?'. I nodded. "We'll meet you down there in a few, okay?" She continued.

"Yeah." With that, I turned and left the room, too, heading for the Sanctuary. I hoped I remembered the way.

I only made a couple of wrong turns in the long hallways, my memory serving me well enough. When I entered the stone hall, I saw Alec sitting with his back against a pillar. His bow lay on the floor in the middle of the room. He looked up as he heard me enter, and he looked like he'd been crying.

"Hey." I went to go comfort him, sitting beside him. He rested his head on my shoulder, sniffling quietly and wiping his eyes.

"Hey."

"Good news." I kissed his hair softly. "We're free. We can go back home."

"They pardoned you?" He looked up, hope in his eyes. I nodded, smiling. He smiled back, relief breaking through his sorrow. "Good."

"So what happened?" I asked, putting my arm around him.

"I spoke to my father."

"Oh yeah?"

"…I attacked him."

"What?" I frowned down at him, worried. He looked ashamed. "I let my emotions get the better of me. I didn't cause any major damage, I don't think, but I threatened him, and forced him to admit he wanted to hurt you."

I wasn't sure what to make of that.

"Well… In all fairness he probably deserved it. And like you said, you didn't do anything serious."

"Magnus, I attacked my own father!"

I sighed. "I know, sayang, I know." Kissing his temple, I let him sit in silence for a moment. He needed this.

After a few minutes, I heard the door open, and we looked up. Isabelle, Jace, Clary and Simon walked in. Fortunately, Maryse was not with them. I didn't think Alec could handle that right now.

"Hey! Did Magnus tell you the news?" Isabelle asked, sitting at his other side.

"Yeah." He smiled at her, and despite all that was weighing on his mind, I knew he was grateful. "I don't know how you did it, but thanks so much. I couldn't stand being on the other end of the Shadowhunters' swords."

"I know." She grinned, then sobered up a little. "So how did it go with Dad?"

He grimaced. "Not well."

"No?"

"I… might have let my emotions get the better of me and threatened him into admitting he wanted to hurt Magnus."

Jace laughed. "Good on you. Standing up for yourself."

"Jace, I attacked him. Pinned him to the wall and threatened him with an arrow."

"Wow. I know you're a big guy and all but you could keep him pinned and have a bow strung?"

"Magically."

"…Huh."

"Yeah." Alec lapsed into stony silence. There was a somewhat awkward pause. Simon cleared his throat.

"So. Um. Are you guys gonna be hanging out with us again or something?"

"Yes, Sean." He gave me the evils, but didn't say anything.

"Good. Because it's been lonely around here without you." Isabelle ruffled her brother's hair. He tried to get away from her hand and failed. I laughed.

"The Clave didn't ransack my apartment, did they?" I asked, frowning a little.

"I don't think so."

"Good. Damn, it'll be good to be home."

"Aww, don't go yet. We only just got you back! Hey, why don't I make you guys something to eat?"

Alec started. "No! No, that's fine, Izzy. Though I would like to stay a bit longer…" Isabelle looked offended, and the others laughed.

We spent the next few hours catching up, just chatting and enjoying being able to relax in each others' company. It was good, but I couldn't deny I was glad to get back to my apartment. It felt cold when I stepped in, and I could tell it hadn't been lived in for a while. Immediately, the Chairman was at my ankles, mewing loudly. I picked up the tiny fluffball, petting him fondly.

"Hey, you little troublemaker. You been okay without me?" He batted a paw against my chest. "I missed you too."

Alec put our stuff down next to the sofa and dropped back onto the sofa cushions with a sigh of relief. I put the Chairman down and he ran to Alec, jumping up next to him and curling up on his stomach as he lay across the sofa, smiling.

"Hey, you want coffee?" I asked, filling up the coffee machine. Its warmth and sound, and the rich smell of the coffee beans was so reassuring after all we've been through.

"Yeah, that'd be great." Alec said from behind me. I smiled, falling so easily back into old rituals.

It was good to be back.


	25. Descent

Alec POV

After all of the stress and panic of the last few weeks, I was immensely grateful to be back where I was most comfortable. The day's… activities had left me feeling drained, both physically and emotionally, so after a few hours of crappy TV and a pizza from our favourite pizza place, Magnus suggested we retire early. The satin sheets looked, felt, even smelt so much like home that I felt immediately safer under them. And with Magnus's arms around me, I fell asleep almost instantly.

The following morning, I woke up later than normal, but still long before Magnus did. He was snoring softly, his back to me as he lay on his side. His hair, jet black and longer than it was normally, spread out across the pillow. I could see his shoulders, so much slimmer than my own, and the pale pink scars across skin so much darker than mine. They looked wrong on him. Scars had always been my thing, my decorations. But now my skin was a plain white canvas and his was the mess of lines I had become so familiar with. It might not have affected how I thought about him, but it did make me sad. I reached out a hand to touch them, feeling the uneven texture under my fingertips. I traced the raised patterns for a moment, then leaned in and kissed his shoulder blade softly. I noticed then that his breathing had changed, and pushed myself up off the pillow to see his face. His eyes were still shut, but he wore a smile.

"Don't stop." He murmured, opening his eyes a little to look up at me contentedly. In the low light of the bedroom his eyes were dark, just a thin golden border around the deep black. I kissed him on the cheek, running my fingertips down his spine. He gasped a little, arching his back. "…Tickles."

"I know." I responded, doing it again. He giggled, rolling onto his front, his head resting on folded arms. Pulling back the covers, I sat on top of him, using both my hands to draw patterns on him. He made a small noise into the pillow, and I swore if he had any more cat in him he would be purring. I played nice for a bit, making him sigh with happiness, before giving in to mischief and letting my hands drift to his sides, making him twitch.

"Alec!"

"Mm?" I did it again, and he couldn't hold in a laugh, squirming underneath me.

"Stop it!" I didn't. "Alexander I swear to God…" He tried to roll over, awkwardly trying to push my hands away. I let him turn to face me, and he fought back, swatting at me whenever I went to touch him. In response, I pinned his wrists above his head, smirking down at him.

"Ha."

"Well, now what? You can't use your hands while you're keeping me down like this." He stated matter-of-factly, looking smug. I leaned down, nipping at his neck in places I knew he was sensitive. He giggled and gasped, and when I stopped to watch his face I saw colour in his cheeks. "Aleeec…" He half-moaned, "Are you trying to tease me?"

"What? No." I smiled at him, just the picture of innocence. Something about the look on his face told me he didn't believe me. He raised his eyebrow for a moment, then his face split into a grin.

"Mmm… You're definitely more dominant than you used to be."

"Magnus!" I protested, then looked down at him, pinned beneath me, and blushed.

"Confidence is sexy." He winked, and I glared at him.

"Shut up."

"Make me." He bit his lip, looking up at me with an expression that suggested he wanted me to do a lot more than just pin his wrists down. More than a little flustered, I resorted to doing something I knew how to do: kissing him. I felt him wrap his legs around me, pulling me against him the only way he could. As I trailed my kisses down over his jaw, I relished in the way he tilted his head up, exposing his throat to me. I took advantage of that, biting down hard enough to leave a mark. He gasped and twitched. Kissing the spot tenderly, I released his hands so that I could move downwards, leaving kisses and bites as I went. Coming to his chest, I ran my tongue over his nipple, teasing him with lips and tongue and teeth. He made a low sound of pleasure in the back of his throat, running his fingers through the hair at the nape of my neck. I shifted so that my hand could run down his body, making him shiver, before resting over his boxers. He ground slightly against my hand, a minute gasp on his lips. I could feel him half-hard already against my palm. Without stopping the actions of my mouth, I began stroking him through the fabric of his underwear, listening to the arrhythmia of his breathing. I worked him to full hardness, and he moaned at me.

"Alec… Just take them off already…" Instead of complying, I stopped what I was doing, much to his displeasure, and climbed on top of him once more, pushing his thighs apart with my knee so I could settle between his legs. I propped myself up with one hand on the pillow beside his head, the other tracing the line of his collarbone. Leaning over him like that, I could see the lust in his eyes, and the slight flush across his cheeks. I kissed him, chastely at first, just a soft brush of lips on lips, then again, and again, until I was dominating his mouth, grazing his lower lip with my teeth and pressing my aroused body against his. Breaking away, I regarded his face carefully. He smirked up at me, his lips ever so slightly swollen and glistening with a somehow obscene wetness. Watching his expression closely, I mimicked a move he'd used on me so many times, raising my hand and clicking my fingers, magicking away the final layers between us and simultaneously thrusting against him. His reaction was gorgeous, the way his eyes widened ever so slightly, his body jerking and the almost imperceptible moan that passed his lips.

"Fuck, using my own trick against me…" He breathed, and his hand found the back of my neck and pulled me down for another kiss. As he kissed me, I began stroking him, and he gasped against my mouth. This didn't last long, however, as I pulled back so I could move down, making myself comfortable between his thighs. I kissed his inner thigh softly, teasing, before beginning to work him with my tongue, running it up the underside and teasing the tip, responding to his every minute motion, finding the actions that drove him crazy. When his fingers tangled in my hair and I felt him pushing gently, silently asking for more, I obliged, taking as much as I could as he moaned my name. He was pulling my hair slightly, his other hand clutching at the bedsheets. I gave him some space, allowing him to thrust into my mouth while I did my best to find all the sensitive spots with my tongue. Swallowing around his length let me go further, whilst also making him twitch beneath my ministrations. I let this go on until he began to lose rhythm, and then I stopped, leaving him teetering on the edge.

"Ah… Alec…!" He stared at me in disbelief. "Wh… Why did you stop?"

I bit my lip slightly, coming back up so I could look him in the eye. He was panting, a sheen of sweat on his forehead. For the millionth time in my life, I wondered how I managed to get such a perfect being to want me, of all people.

"I want you to do something for me." I murmured. "I want you to stop yourself from coming until I let you. Do you think you can do that?" His eyes widened just a little. I could see the incredulousness on his face at my words, and even a little apprehension.

"Maybe with a little help…" He replied, and I saw the glimmer of an idea in his eyes.

"Mmm?"

He leaned forward and whispered a series of words in my ear. "Don't ask where I learned that. Just say it out loud and I'm powerless until you say my name, okay?"

Now it was my turn to be incredulous. Yet… I couldn't say I was surprised that he knew a spell like that.

"Okay." I took a deep breath, placed my hand on his bare chest and repeated what he'd said to me. He shivered, and I could feel the magic take hold.

"Alec…"

"Yeah?"

"Don't you leave me like this too long." He grinned up at me.

"Don't worry. I won't." Summoning our favourite oil, I slicked up two of my fingers and ran one down his dick from head to base, over his perineum and down to his entrance, pushing it inside him. He tensed up, so tight around my finger, and his breath caught in his throat.

"God, Alexander…"

Beginning to move my finger slightly, curling it and trying to find his prostate, I went back down on him. He moaned lewdly, his head pressed back on the pillow and eyes closed, lost to sensation. When he bucked hard, I knew I'd struck gold, and circled the spot with the very tip of my finger, moving my head back and forth at the same time. He moved with me, steady movements interspersed with jerks, like he'd been shocked.

"More…" I was only too happy to give it to him, adding a second finger and scissoring them. With my mouth on him and two fingers inside him, I could only imagine what he must have been feeling, and I felt my own lust growing to unbearable levels. When I stopped once more, he whimpered in need. I didn't leave him wanting for long, slicking up my length. I then lay on my back, pulling him on top of me. He took the hint, climbing on top of me all too gladly and positioning himself over me. When he let himself fall, I gasped. He was so tight, and his heat around me felt amazing. No matter how many times I did this, I still couldn't believe how good it felt. I watched him as he rode me, leaning back slightly so each time I thrust upwards I hit just the right spot, putting his whole body on display for me at the same time. I clutched at the bars of the headboard, my muscles tense against the onslaught of pleasure. Completely shameless, he stroked himself in time with my thrusts. As wound up as I was, it didn't take long for me to be panting and hot, my toes curling as my whole body tensed.

"Oh… Oh fuck… Raziel…" Magnus noticed my state, and leaned down to take my lips with his own. He kissed me roughly, all passion and no coordination. Knowing I was right on the edge, I pushed him onto his back, flipping us over so I could fuck him properly. He cried out as I took over, slamming into his prostate with every thrust. His fingernails dug into my back.

"Please, Alec… I can't… I can't go much longer…"

His voice, so heavy with lust and bordering incoherent, drove me over the edge.

"Ah, Ma-Magnus-!" I came hard, practically screaming his name. As soon as I said it, he cried out too, his whole body jerking hard as he came with me, the spasming of his body around me only serving to draw out and intensify my orgasm. I was left feeling weak, and I felt myself shaking as I caught my breath back, every slight movement sending shocks through me. Finally, after several long moments of nothing but breathing hard and recovering, I pulled out and fell to my side next to him. He didn't react except to roll over and rest his head on my shoulder, seeming too weak to do much else. I put my arms around him, and we rested, purely content in mind and body.

Naturally, the universe wouldn't let us get away with that for long. It was that afternoon, less than a day after Magnus's pardon that everything started to go to hell. Yes, started.

I received a text from Jace, with no context or explanation.

SANCTUARY. NOW.

My heart immediately stuttered upon reading those two words, a knot forming in my stomach faster than I could think. What had happened? Were we in trouble? Had something happened to one of them?

Before I could let my imagination get the better of me, I ran to pull my shoes on, grabbing only the barest essentials.

"Alec? What's going on?"

"Emergency text. Gotta go to the Institute. Now."

Magnus blinked, concern in his features. "Emergency? What emergency?"

"I don't know. No details."

"Well… Should I come with?"

"I guess so. Didn't say you couldn't."

He nodded, then grabbed the nearest pair of shoes and put them on. I raised an eyebrow.

"Let's hope we don't have to fight anyone, huh?" I stated, eyeing the heels on the boots he'd picked.

"Alexander, if you don't think I can handle myself in high heels you don't know me at all."

"Alright." I conceded. "Let's go."

The door was already open when we got there, and I could hear voices echoing from inside. They sounded very serious. I glanced over my shoulder at Magnus, who shrugged, and then we followed them into the stone hall.

"-have to do something! This is the third attack this month!" Once again, all the inhabitants of the Institute were gathered, along with Simon, who was standing at Izzy's side looking a little uncomfortable, like he always did. Izzy was addressing the others, her expression worried.

"Maybe now they'll actually listen to us about what happened during the battle." Clary's expression was fearful. "I mean, this is all awful… but now they might actually be persuaded to do something about it."

"They'll have to. First the angel's wings, now this? It's obvious that Sebastian's a threat. They'd have to be idiots to not acknowledge that. Then again, they haven't exactly proven themselves so far." Jace stated disdainfully. I continued forward until they noticed us. "Alec, thank Raziel. We need your help."

I nodded in Jace's direction. "What happened?"

"The LA Institute was attacked again. The whole family this time. They… Andrew Blackthorn was turned into one of them. Mark was kidnapped. The rest… all the little ones made it out." Izzy sounded distraught. "They- the Clave- should have known this was coming. They should have defended them. After what happened to Tiberius, they must have known LA was marked."

"No point in what ifs." Jace remarked. He turned his attention to Magnus and I. "They've summoned the Council. All the Downworld representatives are going to Idris. And they're calling as many Shadowhunters as they can to aid. This is it. This is war."

He let that sink in. I glanced at Magnus. He stared fixedly at the floor, seemingly lost in thought, a slight hint of a frown on his features.

"Alec, they want you there too."

"What?" Both mine and Magnus's attention snapped back to Jace.

"Are you insane? You remember what happened last time we were in Idris, right?"

"Besides, Isn't it extremely dangerous to have a demon within their borders? What if Sebastian uses me to take down the wards again?"

"He doesn't need to do that. His own blood was enough last time, and it would be again." Clary reminded us. "They're right, Alec. You could be really useful to them, as much as I hate to admit it."

"My boyfriend is not a tool to be used by the Clave! I won't let them do that!"

I faced him. "Magnus, if it's a choice between getting used and watching Sebastian destroy everyone I know and love I know what I'm willing to do." He gave me a pleading look. I just sighed, and addressed the others. "If it will help us win the war, I'll do it."

"Great. Well, we need to get there as soon as possible."

"I can portal us there."

Jace raised an eyebrow. "You can do that too, now?"

"I uh… learned some things whilst I was away."

"It's true. Wasn't even an unpleasant experience." Magnus added. "But I'm coming with you, anyway. Sorry, love, I'm not sending you off to war alone."

"I wouldn't expect you to."

"Great! We leave at first light. You know where to meet us." Jace gave me a smile that said don't-you-dare-get-all-lovey-dovey-around-me to which I responded with a look that accused him of being a hypocrite before I nodded.

"Tomorrow morning. See you then."


End file.
